Ok, no more games. I must reveal my two projects here and now, as I'm in the middle of a limbo. I feel: enough is enough. I've been quiet for so long because I thought it would help me. It didn't.
So let me reveal my projects, to all of you.
The first project, the one I've been promoting on all of my platforms, the gear. I initially helped fission out with the first gear, I even made a folder on my computer labelled 'for fission' when he came to me about the gear (prntscr.com/l5zpx5
), i was too lazy to change it, and it became my default porting folder for qcs. Not assets, those're stored in another place on my computer. All I did back then was search for beta assets and extracted their textures. I also extracted the Splatfest tees (due to the fact they're used for the amiibo) and sent their textures to him as well.
I started gathering models, then, in January of this year, I decided to attempt to port them. I even promoted this on twitter because i was excited to start (prntscr.com/l5zqy3
). I first attempted to port the Mister Shrug Tee, at the time my favourite tee shirt of the game of the short variety. However, the project intends to port every single piece of gear, no matter how liked or disliked in my personal opinion (though not by much, I love the clothing of this series).
First I encountered rotation issues. Knowing Fission did it originally, I asked him how he did it. He then gave me the original enhanced Inklings so I could parent the gear to them and use their bones. It worked, but then the green ring was in the wrong place, and if models were too close to the floor, the shirt would blacken. I put this to a forum, and after research found out it was because the origin point of the model was below a light source. Eventually I had to delete the 'root' bone off the Inklings and Octolings and this solved both problems at once. (The current hero gear still has the green ring problem, and it's personally very distracting since it's not on the model personally)
At this point, the Mister Shrug Tee was okay. So then I attempted to port other short-sleeve shirts, so I did
The Basic Tee, Chirpy Chips Band Tee, HighTide Era Band Tee, Grey 8-Bit FishFry (the official one not my bootleg
), Wet Floor Band Tee, Squid Squad Band Tee, and an unused tee (seen in Splatoon 2's first reveal back when the Switch was revealed in October 2016, yes, they apparently left that in the game)
However, I wanted to attempt to copy Fission, so I attempted to put all the shirts in the same position. After countless hours it looked very hokey, and they weren't actually all in the same position, some were, others weren't, so I decided to leave it for now. I understood on a technical level how it worked, I just needed a little bit of effort.
And the grey fishfry and unused tee due to their shape had to be split and not ported, yet.
So then I decided to try a long sleeve shirt. This was what got me to stop.
I wanted, so badly, to make a joke picture back at FancyNight, who at the time was using a model ported by crueldude of the negative/positive longcuff sweater. I decided to attempt to port the same thing, my intention at the time was to make a picture along the lines of 'I can overuse a picture too' as a taunt since I was getting annoyed at seeing it all the time but nothing else.
So I ported it the way I attempted to port the short tees, parent to a model without the root bone, place it on the model where you'd see it without clipping, export, whammo.
I also renamed Fission's model's hand bones to the same ones the gmod models used, before I made my first version.
First up, the sleeves rotated 90 degrees when bonemerged, up or down depending on the arm you were looking at. I again ask him, and he gives a very vague response. I try for several weeks, importing about 10 versions of this same sweater all with different modifications, still no fix. I assumed 'ok, maybe I can ask later, maybe he's just not being clear enough'
It was minor for the time anyway, nothing else seemed wrong.
Then I discovered I could Advanced Bone Tool the sleeves temporarily incase the models worked, so I decided to test other things, and to my shock and horror, there was another thing wrong.
The weighting, which I didn't understand at the time.
So here I am, test-posing a gmod model and I decide 'ok, I'll unfreeze the arms and see how they go' and the wrists, the sleeves did not sync up with the wrists! This is horrible! I don't know how i could've messed this up, the short sleeve shirts functioned perfectly!
I send it to User who I also knew about the models at the time. I even asked him for the gmod versions of the models, but it seems he didn't have them anymore at the time (I think he does but at the time since he'd moved computers just recently he didn't), and he came up with a solution: turn the bone that's messing up (arm2sub) into a phantom bone, and use Advanced Bone Tool to move it.
This worked, but I rejected it.
Why would you reject it if it worked?!
Because it's not user friendly enough.
You look at Fission's clothes addon. The clothes addon doesn't need to mention anything beyond bonemerging. To add extra steps would be tedious and further complicate sessions if people wanted to animate, or even if they wanted to test the models, see which piece of gear looks good, I like ABT, but I wouldn't want to use it all the time, that's what SFM as a program is for.
You bonemerge and forget. I want that mentality to remain with my gear. You bonemerge it. You forget it. You then fling it around whichever way. It would be tedious to go in and change a slider every single time you want to use a piece of gear, and I don't find that acceptable.
Not to mention the amount of incessant questions from people who wouldn't read the description if so asked....
So at that point, I decided to delay it. Fission wasn't willing to respond to me, and I knew no one willing to help this out at the time, so I just stopped. Silently. This was around the time I told Tomato I couldn't do it anymore, with her nagging me to release what I had, which I didn't want to for several reasons.
1. There are only 2 functioning (at best) models in the pack, not enough to constitute a clothes pack.
2. Their textures and functionality are not final, I would've gone into texture detail would I have gone past the functionality part, they were using basic textures at the time for visibility's sake.
3. Requests. Even if I specify I'm not taking requests, people would immediately assume that porting any piece of gear is the same as another. At the time, there were far more long sleeve shirts than there were short-sleeve. The stress and expectation that I couldn't live up to would make me hate myself.
I didn't want to cancel it, and so after I got a hold of the updates coming out of the game from both RTB and my friends's searching (whose identities I will keep anonymous) for information, I began to hoard assets including gear from all across the board of the game's updates (prntscr.com/l5zsh6
). In the hope that maybe, someday, I will revive this project, and that I will port every piece of gear, regardless of what anyone else has said and done.
That was the project I promoted publically. But that wasn't my only project, oh no.
The second project, the one I've been vague about and the one I care about the most: The maps from Splatoon 1 (ft. Splatoon 2 partially)
In 2017, early 2017, gm_flounder_heights was released. Fission enjoyed it for the person's efforts, but I didn't like it. Flounder Heights was always soft and colourful to me (instead of drab and harsh and confined like the recreation), I always remembered that on the Team B spawn, if you looked to the right, you would see a little playground dotted with squid rides. It was the first thing I noticed when the stage released in Splatoon 1. "Oh! They even have a little playground! That's so cute!"
So here I went browsing through one of the dumps I had of the original game's files. I gathered all the assets to do with the maps, but I didn't know what to do with them. I was also desperate to fix Inkopolis Plaza, due to the immense scaling and lighting issues. I whined on twitter, then I decided to look at SM64 after giving up. I'd uploaded these assets to various file-hosting sites in the hope I may know what to do with them someday.
I made an SM64 video, and then I was approached by DaRealUser. At the time, Fraps had lagged my video's framerate to the point my mouse was lagging and so I'd seen his notification, but I couldn't respond to him until 5 minutes had passed (prntscr.com/l5zsyd
). He wondered how I was going, and I told him how I was struggling with the maps. He'd made one recently, the portal from Final Fantasy and I knew exactly what I wanted to use it for (minorly, but I did). I was too scared to ask anyone (prntscr.com/l5zt9v
), the scale of my project was massive, beyond understanding of anyone at the time. I want to personally challenge myself to get this done, no matter what it takes.
He understood and wanted me to send stuff to him so he could help out. (prntscr.com/l5zu51
Within a few days, he'd made the Octostomp map that I've distributed. I basically thought that was finished with the amount of effort he put in. At the time, he expressed immense amounts of hope and praise towards this, and that's how things began.
So then months passed and nothing occurred. We were beginning to hook together around this point, I don't want to go too in-depth, but you have to realise we didn't start again until late September of 2017 (we would just play gmod constantly together otherwise). I pushed him a lot during this time, gradually I think during August I began to put together the maps in blender by just moving objects around, after a fall-out we'd had between each other.
There's an object that's relative to Blackbelly Skatepark called Obj_AirDancer. It's as the name sounds, one of those dancing balloon things filled constantly with air, typically at car stores or the like. Those things sit near the edge of spawn in Blackbelly Skatepark and at the time, I wanted him to put those in. I'd only gathered a top-down screenshot at the time, and he would repeatedly question me on the importance of these AirDancers. It wasn't until we both entered a private match in Splatoon 1 that he realised the importance of these things in the stage, but by that point I'd put every map together already (just the assets).
So then late September, we then get to work.... or more like he did and I sent him the assets. I even sent him my blend to do with Blackbelly, at this time I was following SplatNet (actually scratch that, I was following a website using SplatNet's schedule and localising it because I don't live in Europe, Nintendo!) for the Turf War versions of the map so then I could copy the assets placed by eye, along with the scale. I was following both that and a python program someone had made for the byaml (layout) files so then I could make absolutely certain what was in the stage.
I originally had access to the MSBT files (text files, to tell me what stage's internal name is and what it links to) (I also use these nowadays for telling me the names of gear, anything to do with text), the Env files (shader files, these had txt documents detailing what skybox model the map used under specific circumstances, which I had to assume as it would only list the skybox model), and the models, which i would load in blender and try to correlate to memory, or the stage itself.
There were also 'kcl' files which as I researched, were the collision models for the maps. We tried several ways to get this working, even if we had to chop it into pieces, and we tried several methods ranging from splitting it via face, to putting it into how many pieces there are based on the objects loaded. User then came to the conclusion he would have to make his own, the kcls were too 'flat' and the effort taken to get them working could be spent on collisions homebrewed to be much simpler, he said, I think.
He asked me to get a picture of my inkling standing next to an object, namely, the fence near the middle tower, for scale comparisons (this is something I feel heavily about, though I later obtained on my own), and collisioned everything. He then noticed the plants in the middle and the stage was empty. With my top-down screenshot, I placed all the plants down by eye and memory and sent them back.
He was doing most of the work, at the time I was worrying 'is he ok with this' but then remembering earlier that year his hopes for a multiverse world, like Hyrule, which we had played in as one of the first maps we played in together. He'd gotten sick and demotivated multiple times, though it's not exactly easy, our timezones are whack.
For reference, here's what happens under all circumstances.
(Key is left is Australian Eastern Standard Time, where I live, right is Pacific Time, his timezone)
DST off here, DST on there (typically start of April to start of October)
DST on/off here and there (on in both places is around October until the start of November, off in both places is around March until the start of April)
DST on here, DST off there (my favourite, typically happens from start of November until the start of March)
We eventually 'completed' Skatepark, the version I'm distributing on this website is the version completed after all that. We promoted this to the group during this time, given a screenshot of Skatepark, and this stressed us out. He was anxious for reactions (prntscr.com/l608ey
) as was I but I wanted us to be able to release it. We never did.
During September-October, he... actually let's go further back.
In June, shortly after we re-met. I'd already made something after caring for him so much, but at the end of the month, he revealed to me he had feelings for me after playing in Gmod a lot with me. I'd warmed up to Gmod multiplayer and I'd gotten used to his antics, and so I let him off on a few Gmod sessions where we'd have fun together. But, when he revealed this to me, I had to say no.
I had someone else who did this once, who i'll refer to for you all as Zerb. it's not far from what his actual name was but he used to contact me often, and even loved me too. But later on I discovered one of my friends he'd said something horrible to directly, and so I lost all contact with him. He later tried to email me, talk to me, but I didn't want to speak to him again.
I just simply don't want to dig a hole too deep for myself.
I wasn't expecting User to do any of what I just mentioned. But I'm extremely wary and cautious, my nature is that of rather seriousness. I'm not a particularly jolly person, unless we're already having a good time in which believe me, I'm loud and obnoxious. But I don't have feelings for anyone, my mind I feel is too immature to truly understand love on anything beyond a level that is fantasy. (Especially if you go too far to the point it may hurt you)
I know it's real. But I just don't think I'm suited to it.
So I told him: no.
But then he was upset.... I researched what this meant, as I've never really understood. Websites tended to mention if that's the only thing someone is looking for and they're rejected, they tend to fade off.
So then I got upset. I didn't want this to be the end of our friendship. I then made it very clear to him that night that I don't ever want to stop being friends just because I don't feel that strongly.
In August-September, he began meeting more people and began to hang around Ellie. I have a vague memory of this time since User had given me the plants I was still putting together the base for Bluefin Depot at this time, and I remember her saying something like 'wow your attention to detail is amazing' since I mentioned I was doing something. I had no issues with her, this was when the stuff surrounding Heavy and her actually happened, I was witness to several arguments.
Eventually he stopped talking to Ellie for reasons I will keep private. Then we worked on Skatepark together, me trying to support him along the way (this was while people would endlessly harass the both of them for both hooking up and then later not doing so)
He then didn't work on anything again at all. I pushed, I even asked him if I could help more, and he suggested something cruel, which made me extremely mad.
I have to say this aloud, I'm sorry.
He was losing motivation for the maps. He didn't want to have to do so much alone. If it were to continue the way I intended it to, we would have to open a donation page, and accept money from you all.
Initially, for a brief moment, I thought so. But as time ticked by, I grew scared.
We would be directly profiting off of stolen assets. In doing so, we could potentially attract attention, and this could (I don't know for certain, but I was paranoid) take down the whole workshop with it, or at least anything belonging to Nintendo. I tried to reason the former with him, he kept trying to dance around it even though it still sounded like we were going to ('we'll make them for another gamemode,' which by the way would mean more work that i was unwilling to pursue) and soon after, I quit it.
This was when I announced the first time we were done.
I desperately wanted to help at this point. I would repeatedly ask him for information on how to help him, I was desperate after he'd asked me to do the qcs shortly after Skatepark had started dev (which had taken about a week for me to make for everything)
So during Feb i think, he came to me and told me the scale of Skatepark was x3.4 the original size of Skatepark. Does this fit with the other maps I wanted to do? Not all of them. By this point, SplatNet and all corresponding websites were down, so I instead analysed potential scale points, turned on the game repeatedly around midnight, waiting for the turf war maps, and grabbing screenshots (with a half-deprecated site since my Wii U didn't play nice with Imgur anymore). I did this until March, when I had to do the egg hunt.
I ported the eggs from roblox, at this point he grew less and less interested (except for one point when he asked me for 'the Salmon Run map' I had (at this point I only had Spawning Grounds and I figured if Fission likes Salmon Run so much (as do I) we should put the only one we have. I even put it all together and anything, I've sabotaged my own gameplay for this)), consistently playing and playing after I was done making everything. By this point, I'd made qcs for all of the maps I'd planned.
We had a fall-out again in April, because I was concerned he didn't care for me after deliberately saying a week before my birthday 'I'll make you something' and then not even saying Happy Birthday on that week. I was rather busy since I was at a holiday house with my friends for a 3-day stayover at the place (the first day was a party between me and them, and it was minimum 2 nights, so I spent the rest with my wii and playing with my chao) but he didn't even leave a message on the day of my birthday. I felt horrible, however sarcastic I pretend about birthdays, I still care enough.
I didn't want to believe him if he wanted to be selfish. However, I had been selfish too, slightly, by hiding my feelings, by not telling the truth.
Why do I care about the gear and these maps so much?
I wrote these stories once, and I cannot tell them without these assets.
I'd even written stories while being inspired by the porting, when Camp Triggerfish was in Blender, I wrote a whole story around it for the then-upcoming Splatoon 2 (the selected being such prntscr.com/l5zxi7
). I sent him some of the scripts I'd written, and told him this was how I truly felt. It's still how I truly feel. That's why my stories are so fractured. I could put them together if these existed. Even if I was the only one to read them.
So I asked him what I could do to help him, and he showed me how to collision. He'd done so in April before he'd acted selfish by not telling me how to collision slopes at the time.
I'd 'collisioned' (make a cube, extend it along the flat surface, rinse and repeat for any other flat surface) some of the maps at this point, though after learning how to extrude and stuff, I then pushed on, doing the hub worlds (the Square and the Plaza), both taking me two months, then I went and referenced Octo Valley (a week) and the boss levels (this took me a week), then I finished the multiplayer levels in about two weeks. I was done at the end of July this year.
So then we start on Flounder Heights in August. We both have a schedule, ish, and progress moves slowly, we need to put in the map entities that were compiled. It's comparitively easier to fix their scale than the rotation of the gear, and I then put it in. The collision model bugs out, we then spend weeks attempting to fix it.
There were still ones he wanted to do, and kept telling me 'don't worry, don't worry, I'll take care of it.' These were:
- Walleye Warehouse (He'd done this to show me how collisions work initially, and it was nearly finished in that regard, he also had a personal connection since it was one of his first levels)
- Saltspray Rig (This was also one of his first levels, and felt strongly toward it as well)
- Camp Triggerfish (After telling him about my stories he felt motivated to take Camp Triggerfish)
- The four Salmon Run levels
Initially, I only wanted to do Spawning Grounds (since it was the only one we had due to lack of updates). But truth be told, it was my least favourite map out of the 4. This doesn't mean I hate it, I actually like it a lot compared to even the multiplayer levels of Splatoon 2. Since I'd already worked so hard on it, it felt horrible to exclude it now. But after I got assets of the other three, I also put them together and wanted to mess with them. However, after explaining the tide thing, he told me he would be fine with doing them, I was asking him 'how should I collision these' and immediately he says that. Comparitively at this point, I had more to do than he did. I was fine with this, and still am.
Things happen in August. It's harder and harder for him because it's his final year of school. This time, I'm being selfish, and I have a hard time with this. We stop the schedule we were on for a few days (where I wake up at 10am and we'd work for 2 hours before stopping), and instead I continue motive to where every maps entities will be placed. Flounder Heights's collision model is ok, the map loads alright, just the nodraw block I put in does something to the middle of the stage, which doesn't show in Hammer. I assume since it's nodraw maybe I pulled it over the middle the wrong way, the assets are still there in Hammer.
Also the collisions don't exist the map is a vacuum of nothing, despite me labelling the prop as a prop_static, which was odd. It has no skybox either, that was for later.
So instead, my mum tells me 'Do what you can until you're up to the next bit' so I instead create vmfs for every other map, placing their entities in. Since the entity type is changeable, I figured it wasn't a big deal if they're all just nothing now.
So I make vmfs, changing the map props and their textures, all until September 13-14, the day of the Direct.
I created vmf files of every one I'd done up to this point (prntscr.com/l5zz4d
). We were so close, I can and could feel it. I also fixed up all the textures and materials of every prop I placed, except ones that had 'glass' on them that didn't have a texture assigned.
He became more and more busy, when I asked him, he said 'I don't know when I'll be ready' and I kept asking 'when you finish, will you be ok' because I was trying to speak from personal experience, having gone through and still remembering my final year of school.
He didn't answer that as an affirmative until much later. He said 'I should be ok in December at the very least' and at this point I'd been negative and doubtful of his actions. He told me not to be, work on something you were doing until then.
'It really isn't that long from now. Two and a half months'
(considering it was mid september at the time, that meant nearly 3 months, because you had October, November, and mid September + mid December, which would amount to basically 3 months)
And so I delayed myself. I then started telling people my drive is full (which it basically is... prntscr.com/l6019p
yes i put i real name there, it's not exactly a secret), and eventually, I'll be back to work.
This was me deciding to do videos and edit them, releasing them on my channel properly. I then decided to finish my to-do list.
It felt long, I grew apathetic but I didn't want to, not after coming so far, to turn back now.
I'd made so much progress. I couldn't just destroy it.
During our schedule discussions in August, I'd told him DST was looming, and he'd pinned the post as a reminder. That day came in October and I sent him a message about DST: hey, today, DST turned on, I know we haven't been talking much, but just making sure. (prntscr.com/l601s2
He didn't respond. I assumed he was busy, after all I remember I couldn't respond to people when the HSC (final tests) was happening, so I let it slide, after all, he wouldn't go back on what he said, right?
That we would help each other, in December?
A couple of days later, JosephtheKP came to me, asking me about modifications to Skatepark. 'We've added HDR, and a skybox!'
Skatepark already had a skybox, but it's the one 'from Lpower's maps'
and this sent shivers down my spine.
Splatoon doesn't use VR_SkyDaytime00 (the skybox they used) for any of the multiplayer levels. This was obvious even without the vr_model.txt file, by the colour of blue, or the shape of the clouds. I'd already known what ones the game used.
They also removed the bunkers, which I wasn't pleased about, having tried desperately to copy the Turf War map down to the location.
'where are the bunkers, and what the hell is that skybox' was my response
and then later gave them a revelation about the skybox, and that's particularly why I'm not as fond of the maps they've ported. They're lit well, I have no idea about their collisions but I'm picky about that, but they're missing several props, and are using the wrong skybox.
Kelp Dome uses VR_SkyDayFilterCloud, not Daytime00. VR_SkyDayFilterCloud has a green horizon, along with more scattered, dusty clouds. It's obvious to someone who went into the maps multiple times like I had to (and have had to in gameplay).
Plus I want the Splatoon 1 ones for consistency with the Splatoon 1 half of the story I never got to tell. They're using the ones from the second game.
I also kinda winced at Camp Triggerfish needing two variations of the maps for each state of the doors. Actual doors in Source can be opened and closed, so it shouldn't be hard to make it a toggle rather than two. separate. bsps.
So here I was assuming he's busy until I spot him online. 'Maybe this is his free time,' I thought
He'd been at me for being negative about this. 'Better you carry a bit of faith instead of doubt. I'd actually prefer faith more than hearing you say you're not getting your hopes up' he said. (prntscr.com/l600hk
So I clogged my schedule up with the to-dos I'd saved until after the project to last me several months, and I was desperately assuming we could help each other in December (since Flounder's collisions that I'd made were broken, as a result, so were all the rest). By this point, my Wii U gamepad died, and is still dead, my console works but the battery of the gamepad is dead. So much for reference (I was going to record the Squisters for a lyrics video people had been requesting and I wanted footage from the amiibo dances).
and then he posted what he did in the group.
I want to be supportive. I don't want to look selfish but i can't help it. He lied to me. Again. I don't mean anything to anyone, so they'll feel comfort in lying to me, constantly, over and over again... even when I still don't know anything.
The collisions were the next major thing, but also fixing the flickering, since z-fighting looks disgusting, and he'd shown off how to fix it on stream, but my sorry mind didn't pay attention how and so I didn't know. I assumed we could do it later while we're busy with the rest anyway....
I can't destroy my schedule now, but once I hit december, I'll have nothing to do.
I desperately need help, and I'm not going to settle for only passing. I want these to be magnificent.
I sound extremely selfish, I know, you are 100% entitled to hate me or feel anger. But he was the one who started all of this originally.
I don't want to give up. I'd hate myself. But I'm lost.
My mother keeps telling me that we can looky look for this kinda thing but i so heavily doubtful considering how niche we are
and I'm fearing the worst
you don't need to help me, but there's no reason to keep any of it a secret anymore. Especially since I'm still lost after all this time, trying to strive only for the best.
However it'll make me look in the end... I don't care.
I'm revealing the truth now. Take it as you will.