Yes as in veterinarian! I love cats and they always seem to love me back. Dogs is always a 50/50 coin toss, they either hate me or love me. I could try it for a while I guess. I'm waiting to make regular at work which should happen within a month or two (finally after 6 years). After I make regular I don't have to be on the overtime list and work 10 to 12 hours a day and I can go back to college to study something. I just don't know what to study, maybe art.
Well, I think for portrait work I should start on some self-portraits because I've asked a few people at work but no one gives me a photograph to work off of, so I have no one to paint. . . I also thought about painting my brothers and sister, I wouldn't mind their portraits on my own wall in my room because their my family so that's good. I might paint Dad and some of my older friends because I know K-Hotaru won't mind. I've been painting fantasy landscapes right now though, so I guess I just jump around on my artwork, whatever I feel like. As long as I'm painting then I'm happy. Funny how certain types of artwork make you happy and others don't, like painting (usually oil but also acrylics) satisfies me but photography, sculpting, watercolors, even sketches and colored pencils will help but it's just not as satisfying. I don't how to explain that, all of those make me happy but one oil painting layer makes me happy during and afterwards for day's.
Sometimes I think Dad is restraining me from doing what I want but others times I'm glad he's around so I don't do as many stupid things. I suppose it doesn't matter, with or without him I still do stupid things and probably restrain myself from doing what I shouldn't do anyway (like going to the postal parties where everyone gets drunk and stuff like that). At least Dad and I get along, we don't fight (well maybe once a year but it's usually over something big and life changing like his last girlfriend and her daughter, he wanted them to move in to my condo but there is nowhere for the little girl to sleep and there really isn't that kind of room in here so we fought about it and then she broke up with him so whew).
I can't really fast for 40 days while walking mail at work but I would still be too afraid if I had the time off. I fasted for 2 days last Sunday and Monday because Monday was Labor Day holiday and I got sick on Monday. It's very hard for me to make it while fasting to day 3 and past that is almost impossible, I wonder if my body is too frail? I'm a skinny shrimp as it is, no fat, very little muscle and small bones, not that all that is an excuse but I guess it's rougher for some people than others? I don't know. Oh sure, in my religion (not sure if it's officially that way) your supposed to find your calling for you lifetime, like what your supposed to do for God in your lifetime by fasting for 40 days. Even Jesus did that in the Bible, in the wilderness but I'm too afraid, I keep thinking that I'll die. I guess if I die, I'll go to heaven but that thought isn't comforting when your body won't even move because it's too weak, then I panic and eat.
Okay I'll stay in on Sunday's then! LOL It's a break for me, I work outside in the heat and want a break, that's all.
I'm just afraid of being hurt again right now if I date. I was hurt for 10 years over the last boy and now that God set me free from the pain (thanks so much) I can do my own things. It's so nice not to cry myself to sleep anymore every other day or at least once a week. It's just nice so even if I get bored and sometimes a little lonely I'm just too afraid of the pain to bother right now. And your right, there is never a good time to date anyone, it depends on that person and myself to be understanding.