What would you do if you weren't afraid?
|23 votes
I would...
78%
I'm not afraid of anything :evillaugh:
22%
petrova's avatar
By petrova   |   Watch
41
Published: July 8, 2013
Comments41
anonymous's avatar
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ElementInfinity's avatar
ElementInfinityStudent General Artist
Fly.

I know it seems to be kind of a stretch, seeing as I'm human. :D But I do anything and everything [within reason] that has to do with incredible heights.

I've always hated the feeling of losing contact with the ground beneath me, and that's definitely on the top of my list of things to do if ever I was not scared to do it. :D
petrova's avatar
petrovaHobbyist
Fly as in having wings or in an air plane?

I know how it is, I hate being up high while moving around (being on a swing is awful).
ElementInfinity's avatar
ElementInfinityStudent General Artist
Sorry 'bout the typo. I meant, "I'd do anything and everything..."

---

Uh, well as in having wings, or just superpowers lol :D

I hate swings as well. In fact, I don't really like hiking much because at one point or another I've always had to get really close to the edge of mountain paths, cliffs, etc... I just... I can't.
Sjazna's avatar
I'd go to the bus station, jump on the first bus and just go where my impulses tell me. Pack a light bag, some money, a drawing pad, the camera and just go. It might be just for a day, or a week, or a month, or even years. Just go where I felt like, follow impulses and live in the now. If my money runs out? It'll be fine. I can get a job or draw for money or hitch-hike... If I get tired? Just sit down next to the road, take a breather. No food? It'll work out.
No stress, no plans, just... go.
THAT I'd do if I wasn't afraid. Drop everything and travel. Near or far, anywhere I want to go.
petrova's avatar
petrovaHobbyist
Yes, yes! I would do exactly the same minus the drawing pad (I suck at drawing, I was good once upon a time). Oh how wonderful it would be just to go somewhere like that *dreams away*
Kipporah's avatar
KipporahHobbyist General Artist
Quit my job and go do what I want, art or vet, which won't earn me any money or food or anything at all, so I put on my big girl pants and deal. I might sell my art someday but most people want portrait work, which I'm willing to try now. Sometimes I wonder if living with my Dad is a good thing or a bad thing too. And I'm afraid of fasting for 40 days. Recently, although I'm not sure if it's laziness or fear, I haven't been going out of my place on Sundays for anything or anyone. I'm afraid to date but mostly because I don't have time for that stuff either so I worry that the other one wouldn't ever get to see me.
petrova's avatar
petrovaHobbyist
Vet? As in veterinarian? If that is something you really want to do then you should look into how to maybe at least become an assistant. I think you can do it.

How is it going with portrait work? And draw what you want to and people will one day appreciate it, if you just draw for other people then the love and fun of art will soon be gone. That is at least my advise.

Why do you wonder if it's bad/good to live with your dad? :heart:

Did you fast for 40 days or is that still something that isn't done yet? I'm sure it's scary before you've done it but I have friends that started fasting due to ramadhan when we were young and they pulled it off just fine. Then again I don't know what kind of fasting rules you need to obey. Is there a reason you must fast for 40 days, if I may ask?

You don't have to go anywhere on Sundays if you don't want to, as long as you're content with staying inside then it's ok.

And last, with the dating, it can be scary to put oneself out there, I know since my heart have been broken a couple of times by now, but when someone love you back it's truly a grand thing. If you don't want to then that's ok but there will never be a right time in life to date someone.
Kipporah's avatar
KipporahHobbyist General Artist

Yes as in veterinarian! I love cats and they always seem to love me back. Dogs is always a 50/50 coin toss, they either hate me or love me. I could try it for a while I guess. I'm waiting to make regular at work which should happen within a month or two (finally after 6 years). After I make regular I don't have to be on the overtime list and work 10 to 12 hours a day and I can go back to college to study something. I just don't know what to study, maybe art.

 

Well, I think for portrait work I should start on some self-portraits because I've asked a few people at work but no one gives me a photograph to work off of, so I have no one to paint. . . I also thought about painting my brothers and sister, I wouldn't mind their portraits on my own wall in my room because their my family so that's good. I might paint Dad and some of my older friends because I know K-Hotaru won't mind. I've been painting fantasy landscapes right now though, so I guess I just jump around on my artwork, whatever I feel like. As long as I'm painting then I'm happy. Funny how certain types of artwork make you happy and others don't, like painting (usually oil but also acrylics) satisfies me but photography, sculpting, watercolors, even sketches and colored pencils will help but it's just not as satisfying. I don't how to explain that, all of those make me happy but one oil painting layer makes me happy during and afterwards for day's.

 

Sometimes I think Dad is restraining me from doing what I want but others times I'm glad he's around so I don't do as many stupid things. I suppose it doesn't matter, with or without him I still do stupid things and probably restrain myself from doing what I shouldn't do anyway (like going to the postal parties where everyone gets drunk and stuff like that). At least Dad and I get along, we don't fight (well maybe once a year but it's usually over something big and life changing like his last girlfriend and her daughter, he wanted them to move in to my condo but there is nowhere for the little girl to sleep and there really isn't that kind of room in here so we fought about it and then she broke up with him so whew).

 

I can't really fast for 40 days while walking mail at work but I would still be too afraid if I had the time off. I fasted for 2 days last Sunday and Monday because Monday was Labor Day holiday and I got sick on Monday. It's very hard for me to make it while fasting to day 3 and past that is almost impossible, I wonder if my body is too frail? I'm a skinny shrimp as it is, no fat, very little muscle and small bones, not that all that is an excuse but I guess it's rougher for some people than others? I don't know. Oh sure, in my religion (not sure if it's officially that way) your supposed to find your calling for you lifetime, like what your supposed to do for God in your lifetime by fasting for 40 days. Even Jesus did that in the Bible, in the wilderness but I'm too afraid, I keep thinking that I'll die. I guess if I die, I'll go to heaven but that thought isn't comforting when your body won't even move because it's too weak, then I panic and eat.

Okay I'll stay in on Sunday's then! LOL It's a break for me, I work outside in the heat and want a break, that's all.

 

I'm just afraid of being hurt again right now if I date. I was hurt for 10 years over the last boy and now that God set me free from the pain (thanks so much) I can do my own things. It's so nice not to cry myself to sleep anymore every other day or at least once a week. It's just nice so even if I get bored and sometimes a little lonely I'm just too afraid of the pain to bother right now. And your right, there is never a good time to date anyone, it depends on that person and myself to be understanding.

xdeathbybananax's avatar
xdeathbybananaxHobbyist General Artist
I would devote myself to him and ask him to be only mine.
petrova's avatar
petrovaHobbyist
Why are you afraid?
xdeathbybananax's avatar
xdeathbybananaxHobbyist General Artist
Because it's only been a month since we've been dating and two months since we were aware the other existed. And my last relationship, the one I thought would end in marriage, was almost an emotional catastrophe for me. What if I'm wrong again? It's not so much the heartbreak I'm afraid of so much as it is spending my time on someone who didn't end up deserving any of it.
petrova's avatar
petrovaHobbyist
I see where you're coming from. Sad to hear your last ended up so bad :hug: And I usually try to see it as every relationship gives me experience I need for the next one (or if you say the last one I will ever have). I've been in abusive relationships, I've been in a moviesque, I've been in one that started in a short time after we got to know each other and I've been in long distance (more than once) etc.

It's not easy when the heart is still broken to see any good coming out from it but with fresh eyes and time there's always something, if it may only be you now can eat avocado (happened to me), you've found an new amazing band or you've learned to not take or be taken for granted.

I really can't say what is the right thing to do for you since I don't know much about the situation but all I say is follow your gut feeling and heart. There are those who have moved in and gotten married within 6 months (or less). There are no set rules on when things should happen or how, it's just to follow the flow.

You can of course always check the status and see how he feels by just testing the waters. You don't have to go full out monogamy right away if you're afraid he backs away. If he plans you in into his life longer than let's say some weeks in time then I'd say he really likes you and you shouldn't be too scared to ask him. But you know, sometimes we need to take that leap and see where it leads us, sometimes we need to be brave and dare :heart:
xdeathbybananax's avatar
xdeathbybananaxHobbyist General Artist
I don't think my heart is broken from it. I'm just terrified of making the wrong choice again. I thought he was the one for 5 years, but looking back on it now, I can see he never should have been. We should have just been friends. I don't regret the relationship because I don't know where I'd be if it hadn't happened, but I know I wasn't myself for most of it. He made me be someone I'm not just because I wanted to try and keep him happy. Unfortunately for us, it was usually the case that only one of us could be happy at a time.

For the last month, we've spent almost every day together. It simultaneously feels like we met yesterday and we've known each other all our lives. We make the same comments at the same time and our style of joking lines up so well that sometimes neither of us are sure if we're really joking or not.

I think we'd been dating for about two weeks when he asked if I would move in with him next year because he's planning on getting an apartment once he graduates. We are well aware of how fast we're moving by normal standards, but neither of us feel like we're rushing anything. He told me that he just wants to be with me on our second date. We decided on an open relationship because I was nervous, but I've recently come to realize that my brain has already "friendzoned" everyone else that I talk to. I haven't talked to him about this yet, but we're going to be spending the weekend together up in Hartford for a convention so I am hoping to talk to him about it soon. We've been exchanging "I love you"s and other deep sentiments for about two weeks. We drive each other crazy, but in a good way. We know how to deal with each other when we get into a grumpy mood, so we haven't even had a little argument [unless we're being sarcastic. (I want to sleep! But I want to go in the pool! Well fine, go in your pool.) I think we ended up napping on a towel in the yard.]

I think I'm just afraid that I'm throwing myself too far into the deep end and I might forget how to swim.
petrova's avatar
petrovaHobbyist
I see, I've been in that type of relationship too - not as long but it really sucks. :hug: FYI, no I haven't had a lot of partners it's just some of them can be bundled up in a lot of different types.

There's nothing 'normal' when it comes to relationships, don't define yourself from that. Define your relationship from what it is for you two no matter the pace. There are those who date for 10 years without moving in and those who date two weeks and move in and get married.

And with the argument, it's good to have those. I know more than one couple that didn't fight for years but the day they did neither of them could handle it because it was new territory in their relationship. Arguments clear the air, but of course, you're not that far along though - you're just in the 'honeymoon' phase and it would be kind of weird if you fought now :aww:

If he already planned you in a year from now and if you two decided for an open relationship due to your nervousness then I'd say you shouldn't feel so afraid to say you want to be exclusive, you seem to be that already, just that you haven't said it. I think it might be a good idea to bring it up toward the end of the weekend (in the beginning isn't good since you will be stuck with each other just if the slim slim chance his answer will be negative). I also think that the ball is with you, since it's because of your nervousness you decided for open.

Worst case he will say no and then you have to decide if you want to keep being in the open relationship or drop it all together. It is terrifying though and I do see why you're afraid of ending up in the deep end without remembering how to swim. From the little I know you shouldn't be so afraid, you obviously love each other, it's just a matter of laying out the terms for the relationship - have the talk so to speak.
NorseValhalla's avatar
NorseValhalla General Artist
Nothing really scares me much anymore. If something happens then something happens, just don't bore me to death.
petrova's avatar
petrovaHobbyist
How come?
Photopathica's avatar
Photopathica General Artist
i would pack up, and leave.
don't know where, maybe scotland, maybe japan, maybe australia.
just - leave.

as someone else pointed out, lack of money is of course also a big reason.
but even if i had that money and wouldn't have to care about stuff that has to do with money - i still wouldn't have the guts.
petrova's avatar
petrovaHobbyist
I'd to the same but like you I don't have the guts or money :/
Photopathica's avatar
Photopathica General Artist
hatar begränsningar :(

det är inte det att jag tycker illa om sverige. verkligen inte. eller ja, klart det finns sådant jag skulle överleva utan.
men alla förväntningar från min omgivning, alla band jag har, allt jag upplevt - jag har en känsla inom mig, en panikkänsla. jag vill bara fly, ett tag. försvinna, klippa alla band.

tror jag skulle må bra av det. bygga upp mig själv på nytt, på något sätt.
sen kan jag nog kanske återvända. om jag inte får smak på världen och reser jorden runt :)
petrova's avatar
petrovaHobbyist
Jag håller med om varje ord du skrivit.
Velox-Mortis's avatar
Velox-MortisHobbyist General Artist
"Snakes! Why did it have to be Snakes?!?" ~Dr Jones

In all seriousness though, fear doesn't keep me from doing anything I want to. Lack of money keeps me from doing anything...and everything...
petrova's avatar
petrovaHobbyist
:lmao:

How I wish I was as brave as you :heart: I do hope your finances will be better soon.
Velox-Mortis's avatar
Velox-MortisHobbyist General Artist
I'm sure you're very brave. ^_^

They will, just need to find a job.
anonymous's avatar
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