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Personalias's avatar
By Personalias
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When Melody and Beatrice decide to skip their senior class field trip and go where THEY want to go, they find out the hard way that they may never graduate at all...or get to kindergarten.  (Altered reality)
Published:   |  Mature
© 2020 Personalias
anonymous's avatar
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RangerBaby's avatar
RangerBabyHobbyist Filmographer

I know exactly what songs that guy with the guitar was singing lol

Personalias's avatar

Just gotta get tix to that show.

Sax--Player's avatar

It is kinda sad the 2 main characters didn't even have a chance to go back to being grown ups... All this was just kinda forced onto them against their wishes.

Personalias's avatar

correct. not a fair ending. no lessons to be learned.

ZordSavage's avatar

You really are a master at the slow mental regression trope: easing your character into new think while bits of old think drift back in and start mixing together. I don’t think even the infamous long_rifle is quite as skilled.

This one has some major Better Late Than Never vibes but is a lot more streamlined. I would say it is the stronger piece since it is more concise than your longer story.

The epilogue is really rewarding and sells the ending. With a lot of these kinds of stories you have the whatever that happens and that’s the end of it. You get no real sense of what the character’s new life will be like. You’ve been pretty good at including epilogues, but I’d say this is your best one yet. It holds the promise of more things to come and leaves the future to the reader’s imagination.

Well written personalias and as always thanks for the story.

Personalias's avatar

Thank you. I try to improve.

crono3567's avatar

Phenomenal work as always

TamaeFTT's avatar
TamaeFTTHobbyist Digital Artist

Wow this was a long one but worth it

Diaper-Dragoon's avatar
Nice stuff! Epilogue was a nice touch.
Personalias's avatar

Thank you.

zeeko28's avatar

Very well written. Love the slow regression, pacing and the school humiliation theme. A new favorite!

Personalias's avatar

Thank you.

Areat's avatar

Neat story. Really liked the epilogue. :]

anonymous's avatar
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