Somewhere deep beneath my disguise,
under the smiles, jokes & the lies,
Theres something else,
Someone with charm,
someone with the confidence,
to do you all harm.
Yet i am willing,
to throw my mask to the wind
to give myself up and let it be free,
because i can't breathe,
because i can't see,
because when you destroy me,
I fall to my knees.
When i'm up late, on fiery nights,
When my eyes start to gleam,
and my soul stretches tight.
The patches begin to tear at their seams,
whats hidden reveals itself,
in my heated screams.
My mind begs to take leave,
as i am left broken and slain.
That is when the lining tore through,
Forever …7 letters and a life time of meaning.
Life times seem like forever…Forever and a day….An extra day just so you don't have to see me pass on…because I'm willing to let you go first…
Watching you die…
That could seem like forever…ever and ever and ever…the list just continues on…
Then there's the extra day I have to wait, without you…wandering if there is existence after existence whether existence is being forever trapped in sleep, entangled in dreams.
Or is it a whole day of memories flooding my waking moments and my sleeping ones?
Memories taking over my reality.
Reality damning me to a day of forever remembering…so Forever d
A young girl stared at her roof, eyes wide with wonder. She had been in bed for atleast an hour and she still couldnt sleep. I had been warm that night so she had done something she had never done before and completely undressed before slipping between the cool sheets of her bed.
Whilst settling herself for sleep she'd accidently brushed her hand against thethe skin the of her inner thigh. something inside of herhad twinged at that very momentand though she was tired the stirring in the pit of her stomache wouldnt allow her to sleep.
so she lay there, staring at her roof, wondering about the stirring in her stomache the way it seemed to cre
My heart was beating so fast, I could feel the blood pumping through me, just thinking about her, her luscious energy. I groaned slowly, she was so wonderful, the way she could just wind me in with the way she made me feel. Why where they locking me up? I love her! She made me happy, no one else could do that, but she did. No one wants me to see her, they all hate her! They don't understand the way she makes me feel with her powerful claws of love and hate and how beautiful everything looks when she's around, the world looks so different with her. God I missed her, my head ached being in this room, knowing that I could be seeing her
Take my hand watch me drift away into a sea of nothingness,
i will be alone until the day, you come back to my side,
My heart is bleeding,
my soul is wounded,
as you take me into your arms,
look into my eyes,
into the vast abyss,
that will eventually swallow me whole,
my pain the hate inside of me will eventually take its toll,
It never really leaves,
It never really stays,
my pain, my love, this hate, it never really fades.
Cut my wrists please watch me bleed
my terrorised soul can now be freed
you tried so hard,
now watch my blood flow,
your head on my chest,
feel my heart beat slow,
so scared you are,
but i can't go on,
you look at me now my heart has stopped,
it starts to sink in,
you think down the track,
I've been drained of my blood i can't turn back,
my eyes so blue, they weren't filled with love,
not like yours that couldn't stagnate the hunger i had for death, the hunger i had, but now there's none,
you loved me, when others had not,
i loved you, but i forgot,
get up now and leave me here,
alone in this room,
along with your fear.
There was a candle flickering in on my chest of draws as the one that I truly loved walked into my bedroom to greet me with a warm kiss. He stopped halfway Glancing at the candle and back to me, his eyes tracing invisible lines down my face, following those of my previously departed tears.
He continued walking towards me, though he did it rather tentatively as if he somehow knew what was coming. He kissed me on the forehead before dropping down beside me.
"What's wrong?" He whispered, urgently. I looked down; my heart was beating so rapidly, my head was spinning with words to say. Could I go through with this? Could I tell him the truth b
So happy they were,
Those two little devils, always on something, Drugs alcohol and dreams,
two little devils, they made me who I am, tough and strong and my own, depressed alone and sad.
Please forgive them for their troubles, they trouble me too,
forgive them for their worries, their worries disguise their pain, their pain is mine to keep and mine is theirs to slay,
and kill and leave to rot, blowing in the wind.
My thoughts will never leave them, never for a day, I'll never ever leave here at all, ever, for they killed me when they died that day.
Fulfil me please, your touch was mine, mine to hold and caress and find.
Take me please, back to that place where we used to bind alone and at peace
my soul was magic yours was my key, the key to my heart. You set me free,
My heart beat hard and fast and soft all at one time once when we were aloft, on to the clouds where we caught each others woes and put to rest our fears and we rose,
Above the houses and into the skies together forever, we shall fly
Im so confused
buried deep under the ground in my suffocating casket
I lie inside my prison
my hell nailed shut
someone take me out
someone let me breath again
i never have made sense to this world
and yet in that brief second in your arms.. when time stops
I make sense
I just make sense
as a person or a monster i just make sense
i don't know how to explain it really
some things in this word just cannot be explained
Like love, Horror and even reality
Unfortunately those will never make sense.
But darling somewhere in me believes
I still believe
We can and will make it through
I will escape from this wooden prison
and be war
and havent really posted anything in ages
i have been taking photos. but i havent really written anything.
i havent been unhappy i s'pose, and thats why i havent written much.
That and after writing and then typing 2,000 min word history essays (of my own accord i dont get forced to write that many words lol) every 3 weeks, im kinda over the whole writing thing...
but i will try again!!!!
as for the photos, my standards gone up and unless i think its the most awesome picture ive ever taken EVER it wont go up.
so il push myself past that and put them up anyway as soon as im at home and can. :D
i know its so unusual but yeah i updated .lol.
two pics of my mums cacti plant mojo. it was really pretty..
i didnt even know it existed til my mum came out all excited about the cacti shes had for two years finally flowering.. hahah. well i know its there NOW and thats the important thing.
also the DEV ID thingo. its an old photo, but my Trent reckons thats the photos of me at the formal is what made him stop and realise he really liked me :P so i put it up there for him..
hehe just to brag weve been dating 6 months.. :) it feels like 2 months have passed ^^
laurahhh if you read this...my little emote guy is what your and callens kids a