I need an outlet.
Something to occupy my time...occupy my mind. I keep bottling up all my feelings and just...I can feel it starting to boil over. I thought coming out would make me feel better. I thought getting out of an unhappy relationship would make me happier. And it has, to a point. But even though we aren’t together anymore, you still know how to tear me down.
You still know what buttons to push to test my limits. You know what’s going to make me feel terrible about myself. You know how to drag me down and make me feel worthless. I try not to give you this power over me, but it’s hard.
I know I’m not the best person out there. I know I may not be the number one, perfect mom. But I will be damned if I ever let you call me a bad mother ever again. You can make fun of me for my sexuality. You can lash out because I hurt you and ‘wasted six years’ o