Notoday

Can i spend time on you? I would like It seems I think i would like To spend At least a little time Spend a little time on youCan i spend time through you? Meter filling Nickels and dimes with you Sand in sunscreen With you Dead skin flaking off of youCan i spend time with you? The usual stuff You know Nothing extraordinary Fill my life with youCan i spend time for you? Let me choose How you allocate Invest wisely for youCan i spend time near you? Sorry for the bad investments I thought i knew betterCan i spend time on you? Please?

split lips rub against a pillowcase rubs against the peeling wall open window curtains flappingcold breeze rubs against split lips warm face craving sun craves rest, craves releasefuture tense, present felt in weighed down eyelids, blurry screens, silent screamsfuture starers stare back with blurry lips and eyes no one's crying, but-- but no one is--split lips rub against a pillowcase every smile re-injuring tender things heal slowly herefuture face is different and yearning toward stability every day working toward-- working for-- future is groundless and grounding, future is scary and calmingly abstract, future is--so make your mind a bl...

i kissed a wall today today i kissed a walli slept it off today today i slept it offi split my lips today today i split my lipsi went away today today i went away

did you hear it? the cracking of another early morning sidewalk step--heel hits first-- connects with concrete beside a crumpled straw wrapper and aluminum can tab--heel hits first-- then a slow bending allows the rest to join, and, just as quickly, toes are alone, pointed downward, and brought back, once more into air

she slipsshe wrote too much today and felt it in her wristsshe spent too much time thinking about the past and felt it in her jawshe sat for far too long noticed her neck dip down below arched shoulders and felt it in her backshe didn't eat enough today and with a stomach full of air walked home past cream-colored sedans and sirens screaming loudly and felt it in her earsshe stared with concrete eyes at the back of his head the spot above his neck inviting her tightly-closed fist and, if only in her mind, she swung and felt it in her wristsshe slips

and if loose lips sink ships then tight lips are walking unlit path-ways-- sidewinding knotted snakes, and if soundings of splitting torsos seem too much like acts of undoing, then I wonder if you know where my dread rests when eye-rubbing wakeups have me feeling so

"It is possible."She wrote this on my forehead the morning after she left forever. I woke up with a sore throat, itchy calf-- eyes gummed shut.  Her laugh was a chandelier falling on the moon, and I was a golf ball that never came back after being hit.