Comatose ch1 real

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By NostalgicElle   |   
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~ Chapter One ~
Koronli, a young hume male with blond hair and red tips to the ends of each strand, looked over his shoulder to the woman behind him. Her blond hair framing her face to her delicate light purple dusk eyes, she waved at him and whispered without audio for him to proceed.

Rolling his sapphire blue eyes, Koronli looked above him. The guards paced on the high riggings of the wooden walls surrounding the palace ruins. One shot was all he had. A quick inhale of air before he proceeded.

Koronli dashed through the small slit in the pillars and hurried to a stone cobbled wall. He stopped with his back to it a peered around quickly to check the positions of each of the ten guards. A quick double check before he scooted around the corner and dove into the shadows. Slowly he lifted his head up to check their positions, and then he lay flat and began to crawl on his belly toward the hole in the cobblestone wall.

The woman looked around and quickly followed Koronli’s path once he had vanished inside the palace through the hole. Once she was in, two Elf males followed.

The woman nodded to the elfs. “Stay here and keep a watch for the guards. If you see anything about them entering the castle, scream FIRE,” she instructed the two elfs. The two identical elfs nodded; each had short brown short hair and golden eyes with light skin, proving that they were of the lower rank of the Elf kind.

Koronli waved his hand, “I’ll go to the bedroom.”

“And I’ll go to the throne room.” The woman nodded.

“And if you find the prince, bring him back here?” one of the elfs asked.

“Exactly,” the woman nodded. “Three minutes. Go.” She turned and hurried down the corridor to the left, disappearing into the darkness.

“Think Lady Abandon knows what she’s doing?” one of the elfs asked after she vanished.

Koronli looked to him, “If she doesn’t then we’ll all be hanged upon exit.” The elfs looked to him. Koronli just shrugged a bit and ran down the opposite way Abandon had.

~ Scene Alters to 200 years before in the palace ~
Cyan sapphire eyes watched from the shadows with intensity only feline animals could have it. The young hume was dressed in dark brown cloaks and layers to hide his appearance while he eavesdropped onto the conversation being held inside the chapel.

“You’re saying that killing just the king and queen wouldn’t do us any good?” asked a male hume with short silver hair.

“Exactly, we need a piece of the puzzle so the people don’t revolt.” Answered the Drata, his metallic blue skin shining in the firelight. His equally metallic blue hair was tied back into several braids and was adorned with many beads that showed all colors of the rainbow.

“But sir, what is this piece?” asked the first.

“The one person they’d never expect.” He answered, “The prince. With him in our hands we can easily control all of this wretched country.”

“Planning to kill me in my sleep with a poisonous snake and then carve out my heart for a prize?” asked a young woman with skin as black as the night, golden eyes and shimmering bright white hair.

“Ah, the woman who leads the Elf,” nodded the tall Drata. “Tell me, what is it you plan on doing here?”

“That is my inquiry to lowlife such as yourself,” she answered, walking toward the two men and stopped beside them. “You want the prince? I want the prince.”

“Then I see it cause to work together,” said the hume.

She shook her head, “You humes are all alike.” The men blinked, staring at her. “You think in small ideals.” She waved her hands and paced in a large circle around the chapel. “To honestly claim this land as our own we cannot simply kill the royal family. No, that would allow them to bring forth a new family of said royal blood. What we must do is go to VanDale and trick that fortune teller of eternal life to curse our pawn.”

“Curses are no good,” the Drata shook his head.

“If you cast them with wrong intents, then yes.” She nodded, “But all we need is him to be put into a deep coma, only to awake when in the aged roses highest concentration.”

“They cover the land now!” shouted the hume.

“Silence fool!” barked the Drata. He cleared his throat, “Lady Salu, please continue.”

She nodded, “We’ll take his body and seal it away in VanJosen, where no one can reach him without permission of the Elder.”

“I like it.” The Drata nodded.

“Ah but what of the king and queen?” the hume asked.

The Elf nodded, “We’ll assonate them both. This country will have no need of them anyways when we invade.”

“We?” the two men asked.

“I stand before you, a representative of the Ptemotri Empire.” The Elf answered. “Now, either you agree to our terms and surrender over all your militia or we’ll wipe you clean when the King and Queen’s heads are slice from their shoulders.”

The two thought a moment before being forced to nod.

“Hume, get the Fortune Teller in VanDale.” The Elf ordered. “Drata, you come with me. We’ll kill them tonight.”

The young hume who had been listening ran out of the room and down the halls. In a fierce panic he ran to the throne room.

“Mother! Father!” he shouted, “They--”

“Silence, Suran,” ordered the Queen. “Your father is meditating.”

“But we must leave now!”

“This castle is our home. Don’t you ever dare to speak of abandoning it in any situation!” his mother ordered.

“But…” Suran turned around quickly as warriors from the Ptemotri army came rushing in.

“Surrender and we won’t kill anyone else!” they ordered.

Suran shook his head and ran out of the room. Down the halls, turning past the treasury and pushed his way into the weaponry room. Suran hid himself inside a chest of arrows for several hours. When dawn came, he came creeping out of the room carefully.

The palace was silent. It gave lead to believe that everyone had been taken prisoner or killed. Walking back through the silent corridors, Suran stopped at the entrance to the throne room. He looked around the pillars a bit and froze when he saw the sight of his parent’s bodies laying flat on the stone floor.

They had been killed at least four hours before.

When Suran turned around to run he banged into a guard. “Well look, here’s the missing Prince!” the captain laughed, grabbing ahold of Suran’s hair. “We’ve been expecting you.”

“Let go you monster!” Suran ordered.

Carried down through VanDale and all the way into the dark shadows of VanJosen, Suran was tossed into a pool of cold water.

A very old hume woman stood at the edge of the pool and began to chant. “Suran thy soul locked time within thee hours of seconds to nothing. Thy spirit and time locked within the chest of eternity. Death comes nither and life stays ever. Destined rock fate be thy true. Aged Rose pollen and fragrance awaken you. Locked here by the spirit guards. Only thee Elder of Josen Land will free thee.”

As she chanted the water came up and circled around Suran until he was submerged. By the time she finished the water had hardened to ice and locked the prince into a coma he couldn’t awake from.

~ Scene Alters back to present time, 200 years later ~
Koronli tapped his right foot impatiently after entering the dusty old bedroom of the Prince. “Something’s not right…” he mumbled as he looked around.

He circled around and stopped at the largest wall, studying the tapestry hanging on it.

It depicted a giant rose with a body trapped within the petals. Along the base of the tapestry were red flames and people crying in agony. At the top were bright clouds shining blue light. From the left side came the moonlight and from the right came in the rain, hiding shadows of warriors dressed in black shining armor.

“It’s like… He never came here.” Koronli answered the silence, looking to the bed. Everything was covered in a thick layer of dust and cobwebs strung around the ceiling and furniture.

Walking slowly, making footprints with his boots in the dust, Koronli stopped next to the bedside at a small chest sitting on the table. He tilted his head before leaning down and blowing off the top.

“3773 Dream?” Koronli read the inscription. He shrugged and picked up the chest, moving it around in his hands to look for a way to open it. “Oh,” he nodded seeing the latch on a side. He put the box down on the table and then opened the box.

He sighed heavily seeing only an old tan envelope inside, tanned by time. Grumbling he picked it up, “This is it? Hardly worth hiding it in a chest.”

Disappointed, Koronli went back down the hallway to the whole at the north. He waved seeing Abandon back. The group walked out of the castle walls carefully and hid behind an edge from the guards.

“Find anything?”

“Nothing,” Koronli shook his head.

The elfs pouted, “Then let’s just leave!”

“No!” Abandon shouted. “We came here for a reason!”

Koronli rolled his eyes. He walked around the arguing group to the corner nearby. “A hatch..?”

Abandon looked over to him, “What?”

“A hatch.” Koronli repeated, pointing to the different shaped stone on the floor.

The elfs walked over before feeling around the edges and lifted it up to the side. They all peered in.

“A ladder..?” one of the elfs asked.

Abandon nodded, “A ladder. Let’s go home.”

“No.. I wanna know what’s down there.” Koronli said softly as he climbed down the ladder.

“Koronli!!” Abandon whispered at him angrily. “Get back here!”

“You go back. I’ll be back later.”

“You’re gonna get us all caught!”

“We only had ten minutes!” one of the elfs answered.

“The guards’ll be after us!” replied the other Elf.

“Then c’mon,” Koronli answered from the darkness, his figure gone from sight.

Abandon rolled her eyes and climbed down after him, “If we get caught I’m killing you…”

“Yeah. I know.”

The two Elf looked to each other before sighing and climbing down after the hume. Koronli stared around himself. People with pale skin and dark hair walked around the cobblestone streets. Everything was dark, lit by lanterns and the children’s cheery attitude. Abandon jumped down next to him, looking around. The two Elf fell down next to them.

“Wow!” exclaimed one Elf.

“Cool…” nodded the other as he stood.

Koronli walked out of the alley a bit to see all the people walking around their daily lives. Slowly, one by one, they stopped and stared at him. The whole small town falling silent.

“Well, this is awkward,” Abandon nodded. “Any idea where we are?”

Koronli didn’t answer for a moment, thinking. Then a small smile crept its way onto his face. “VanDale.” He walked toward the crowd, waving his hand with a smile.

Abandon blinked, “VanDale..? The VanDale? The town the palace was built on?”

“Guess so,” nodded the Elf as he ran past to walk with Koronli.

“Didn’t know it was literally,” answered the other, running after the first.

“That’s crazy.” Abandon shook her head, walking after them.

“You there,” called an old woman to Abandon.

Abandon turned and looked down a darker alley to the old woman. “You referring to me?”

“Yes, lass,” nodded the woman. Abandon walked toward her. “You look like the one it speaks of.”


“The Guardian is coming and wants your sunshine hair and clothes of the moonlight.” The woman answered.

Abandon laughed, “You mean the Dynast-Guards? They were wiped out two hundred years ago.”

The woman nodded, “The Guardian is coming for you…”

Abandon nodded slowly, before hurrying back to Koronli. “So, find out anything?”

“It’s VanDale, they all say so.” Koronli answered.

“Great…” She looked around him. “Where’d the Elf go?”

“To the Bar,” Koronli shrugged. “Apparently this is the only place near here to get the Elven Beer.”

“…Find out anything?” Abandon asked after a minute, the people surrounding them starting to go back to their lives.

Koronli nodded, “The South Alley has a path open all the time. It leads to the sort of slums of VanDale. Someone said that’s where the lineage was taken.”


The two ran down past a rounded building and looked toward the square of the town. People were shouting and laughing, acting drunk.

“Looks like they found the beer,” Abandon rolled her eyes. “This is why it was outlawed above grounds ‘cept in the woods!”

Koronli blinked, “What’s it do?”

“To Elfs who haven’t had much of it, it puts them into a simple state of lacked motor skills and stupidity. Much like a full drunken hume.” Abandon answered, starting to run toward the square. “I’ll handle them. You wait there!”

Koronli pouted, before turning around. “Between the gardening shop and the scribe’s house…” he mumbled. He looked quickly back toward the direction Abandon ran. “I won’t be long…” he nodded and ran to the scribe’s house.
© 2007 - 2020 NostalgicElle
Comatose ch1 since I never put it up here.

The labeled ch1 is the prologue.
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