literature

10 Ways to Annoy Emmett Cullen

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Literature Text

10 Ways to Annoy Emmett Cullen

10. Tell him he looks like a creepy stalker rapist.

9. Inform him, as politely as possible, that he has grizzly in his teeth.

8. Ask who wears the pants in his relationship.

7. Try to stab him through the heart with a stake.

6. Tell him brawn is out, scrawn is in.

5. Inquires as to how he feels to be the least-liked Cullen male.

4. When he is around, wonder aloud what Rosalie calls him in bed.

3. Ask if he is overcompensating for something with that Jeep.

2. Ask if he is overcompensating for something with those muscles..

And the Number One way to annoy Emmett Cullen?

1. When he denies the above two claims, respond with “That’s not what Rosalie saaaaaid!”
Emmett is pretty cool. But the guy who is playing him in the movie looks like a creepy stalker rapist, dontcha think?

Alice: [link]
Bella: [link]
Carlisle: [link]
Charlie: [link]
Edward: [link]
Esme: [link]
Jacob: [link]
Jasper: [link]
Rosalie: [link]
© 2008 - 2022 nikatil
Comments241
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ReasonIDrink's avatar
I don't know what you're talking about. Emmett is my favorite Cullen male. He's the most like me (or vice versa I guess)
HoneyRoastedNuts's avatar
Well, scrawny is in. Leo Valdez says so
DlyanBlake1666's avatar
Me: *Looking at the list, looks over shoulder*
Emmett: *Emmet standing across the room*
Me: Hmmm... *Looks over Shoulder again to see He has vanished*
Emmett: *Appears over My shoulder* whachya doin?
Me: ACK! *leaps up and clings to ceiling*

The next day...

Me: Hey Emmett!
Emmett: Huh?
Me: You got uh, Grizzly in Your teeth...
Emmett: Really? *begins picking teeth*
Me: *shakes head scratches 10 off list*

Me: *hides around corner durring Paintball match with Emmett, drops gun takes out wooden Stake*
Emmett: Hiding won't help!
Me: *spin around corner thrusting stake at Emmett*
Emmett: dude! You don't get points for Melee Kills! *Sprays Me with Pink colored Paint Balls*
Alice: You look good in Pink!
Me: *stares ominously at Alice*
otisali's avatar
I had finally hit rock bottom I was able to regain my independence using this these days im making my way to the top take a look at what I mean
[link]
I finally made a life changing decision this was the perfect solution now I feel whole again just trying to look out for you
[link]
bella-katniss-2555's avatar
you are awesome! lol!
Rocky-da-kitteh's avatar
I like 9, 8, and 4.
TheForgottenDaughter's avatar
I was half expecting something along the lines of "so if you're so strong how come the newly turned vampires can beat you no problem? Aren't they like... baby vampires?" lol I really liked #9
Berries-Fields's avatar
That is a good one.
Emrilb's avatar
I LAUGHT SO HARD AT #8!!
EmmettWrestledABear's avatar
Kellan doesn't look like a stalker o.O ARO Looks like a stalker... as does Mike... little annoying pipsqueak.
tinkerbell52589's avatar
I agree with you 110%!! =D Kellan is awesome and so is Emmett! =)
xxBronzeGoddessxx's avatar
I LOVE EMMETT AND KELLLAN! I think this is funny tho
Wulfluver11's avatar
That's not what Rosalie saaaaaid! Lol.
blizzardstar33's avatar
I LOVE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
fangrl62's avatar
that IS NOT what rosalie said :iconraepfaceplz:
celiarussell's avatar
he would be like "compensating?" as if, ill show you ;P haha
DlyanBlake1666's avatar
*Covers Alices Eyes* Dude children present!
Leopardnight's avatar
The way for me to annoy him would be this. "I'm shocked with you-Some one as strong as you doesn't know as much as a prep like your girl-friend Rosalie?" Then he might kill me, but I'd claim I was Bella's best friend and say that Edward would kill him if he hurt me because Bella would be in pain.

I enjoy #1, #2, and #5
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