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Bionicle- Nova Orbis- Mystery- FINAL CHAPTER

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By NickOnPlanetRipple   |   
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© 2014 - 2020 NickOnPlanetRipple
And so, we come to the end of the first years' story with more questions on our minds than ever. But for now, the important thing is that the Crust-Buster is destroyed, Ultio is powerless, and the Matoran are safe... for now. There's always next year.

So... let's talk about a few things.

The cat's out of the bag. The Matoran have seen Ultio's race. The Turaga can't hide his kind from them anymore. This'll make things interesting.

And yeah, it looks like Attra eventually escaped the wreck he made when he performed the Nova Blast (even protecting himself and Noyra, somehow... maybe with a super magnet bubble or something), but not before Noyra succumbed to his injuries. >shrugs< Oh well.

In the last few panels, I don't think it should be hard to guess what species Kopeke's agent is. It's going to be fun, getting to know her as one of next year's characters.

The craziest revelation of all is that Tenius was one of these "units," these walking, talking cameras the Edict spoke of, all along! Now, though, maybe his life will become less complicated. ...Oh, who am I kidding? It only gets worse from here. It always does.

Yeah, I figured some people would find the perspective of that panel used, like, ten chapters ago kind of odd. It wasn't unintentional. I've been waiting for weeks to reveal that not only was that scene viewed from Tenius' perspective, but that the "others" were watching the whole thing, and even that this is where the Edict got that recording played at the end of that very same chapter.

CRAZY, huh?

Anyway... I'm not sure you could say Ahkmou and Mieli are a couple. I mean, you could, but... eh. Some people have come to me, wanting to ship them, and... I guess that's okay, I mean... Ahkmou isn't exactly anatomically correct, but now we're going back to what Greg said about Matoran love.

I guess the whole idea is that Ahkmou is such a complicated person, and so different from everyone else, that only a strong empath like Mieli can even begin to truly understand him, and that connection has only gotten stronger throughout this adventure. So yeah, they do have a very special bond. Make of it what you will.

And yes... it seems that the Great Spirit, Mata Nui, is still with us, after all. Call it destiny, call it whatever you like. After all he's been through, I think Ahkmou's weary soul may be a believer, again.

I just wanna say, this whole thing has been really REALLY fun. When I began this a year ago, I wasn't sure how I'd go about it. I couldn't even be sure I'd ever get this far. I'm not stopping here, though. A little into next year, once the buzz of the new Bionicle sets has died down a bit, I'll unveil the next wave of Matoran and other 'sets,' and I'll write book 2, "Return of the Toa Miro" (working title) in late spring/early summer.

So don't worry. This isn't the end. We still have so much to learn about this world in the years to come, so many adventures to have with its people. There's gonna be plenty of Nova Orbis to go around.

At the moment, though, I think it's only fitting that we listen to "Trigger," by Cryoshell, this year's theme, if you will. www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ihN8L…

Toa Novus trigger full by NickinAmerica

Thanks for sticking with me through this, guys. I'm not sure what I wanna work on, next, but I'll be sure to turn in something special before the year's over.


Beginning >> Bionicle- N.O.- Mystery of the Toa Miro- Prologue by NickinAmerica

Previous chapter >> Bionicle- Nova Orbis- Mystery- Chapter 23 by NickinAmerica

Full series >> nickinamerica.deviantart.com/g…



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Comments27
anonymous's avatar
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Battledroidunit047's avatar
Is Voima as Skakdi by any chance? Also, Thank the maker Ultio's plans have been thwarted!
Mechx11's avatar
I have finallly finished reading (after abandoning this story around the time you had your TTV interview).....

Thank you.

One of the best stories I've ever read!
NickOnPlanetRipple's avatar
No prob. I do intend to get back to this soon.
ColdGoldLazarus's avatar
ColdGoldLazarusHobbyist General Artist
A year after I first discovered it, I have gone back and reread Nova Orbis. Just as good, if not better, the second time around. I love what you've done with Ahkmou as a character, and this whole story is just so very amazing. You are truly the MVP of the entire Bionicle fandom.
NickOnPlanetRipple's avatar
Thanks, but... what does MVP mean?
ColdGoldLazarus's avatar
ColdGoldLazarusHobbyist General Artist
Now on to the new arc!
Sl33pdeprived's avatar
Sl33pdeprivedHobbyist Artisan Crafter
Yep still hate the turaga of fire still a fucking prick. Cant wait for more if you decide to this was awesome veryinpiring
finishingthefight's avatar
Clap 
Damn dude, you wrote a pretty fantastic story and I can't wait for more, I think Ahkmou's probably my favorite, with Uira in second
Fatonus's avatar
You've created an amazing world to share with us.

I have a couple of notes on how you may improve your writing style.
Sometimes, you could stand to convey information in a manner more helpful to the narrative.
Giving the villain's exact thoughts breaks the feeling of being in the middle of the story alongside the main protagonists. 
In addition, word choice is extremely important. The word 'stumped' could be replaced with more appropriate terms in 
various situations, such as 'astounded', 'bewildered', or 'befuddled'. My central point is just that a writer sometimes has to
carefully consider whether a particular word or phrase is the best one to fulfill a particular purpose.

Congratulations on all the success you've had. You have done a fantastic job in constructing and designing this new world.
Personally, I'm excited by the possibility that we may be taken to explore more of the island in the next arc.
I wish you good luck and I thank you for using your creativity to share this captivating expansion of the Bionicle Universe.
NickOnPlanetRipple's avatar
Thanks. About the villain... I didn't know how much of this story he was going to be present for (turns out we didn't get to see him much at all), so, since the other characters don't talk about him much and build up his character the way Makuta was in the old days, I felt the need to define his character very clearly in a really short span of time, and I can only hope I didn't make his portrayal feel rushed in trying to convey what I did to the reader just like that.

And as for my choice of words, believe me, I am VERY picky about that. More often than not, the very words you're using crossed my mind, but I kept worrying that if I threw in too many "big werds," it would seem flowery and showy, and not as to the point as I wanted it to be.. In trying to make the narrator speak like a "real" person, I don't quite know what I've done.
Fatonus's avatar
I can see how choice words may give some readers that impression. On a seperate note, I was wondering which unresolved plot points you find the most intriguing or most important to explore. There was without question a great deal of wasted potential in the final years of Bionicle G1. Will you take liberties with the story as far as the Spherus Magna story is concerned? I think that this page, (biosector01.com/wiki/index.php…) is an excellent reference for the specific arc I'm referring to. I would love to see the loose ends of this part of the story wrapped up in a way that ignores the execution and writing in these serials, taking liberties with that more dubious part of the canon.
The biggest mistake Greg made in his final treatments for the Bionicle storyline was that all of the various ideas he'd had for the continued Bionicle storyline were thrown into the final serials and assumed to happen simultaneously. There was too much going on, and it was all just kind of being thrown together very haphazardly, without any of the finesse seen during the first eight and a half official years of Bionicle's run.

To me, the most important pieces were all laid out with the Element Lords, planned as Winter villains for 2010; Takanuva, whose destiny was said to be tied to the Great Beings; and the unexplored wilderness of the Bota Magna region. It would have been cool if Toa Tuyet had attempted to conquer the planet. Perhaps a much more hesitant Velika would then have been forced to activate the Marendar in order to stop the Nui Stone empowered Shadow Toa. The role of the Element Lords could be established either before or after this arc, with the revelation that the rebirth of Spherus Magna has freed them from the maze.
Notes: While Velika releasing Tren Krom and Karzahni from the Pit adds a few too many independent villains to follow, capturing another criminal and taking them to Hydraxon would make it possible to easily establish the presence of the two in prison, thus resolving both of their storylines.

The Red Star's presented purpose was so disappointing to me it's almost hard to describe. It would be cool if the Toa Mahri were sent to uncover it's true nature, perhaps with the help of somebody else. This would be especially interesting if the Mahri received new bodies which combined some of the powers of the Inika with the masks of the Mahri, maybe with new weapons as well. In their quest, they might encounter the spirit of their fallen comrade, Matoro, who could assist them in some way.

In the exploration of Bota Magna's wilderness, I like the idea of a team based on the one originally planned for Bionicle 5. This might consist of Takanuva, Gresh, Kiina, a new fight-fixing fire and ice pair, and a female Skrall who escaped Anonna's control.

Finally, I would love to see a dystopian story where Ahkmou struggles with morality during the Reign of Shadows arc, with Rahkshi capturing Toa, and Vahki patrolling the city in search of resistance. The main plot could follow the Matoran of Voya Nui, all of whom have been leading the resistance in Metru Nui. Velika could reprogram Bohrok to fight the Rahkshi/Vahki forces, being an engineer like Nuparu, while the Av-Matoran could use their abilities to assist the remaining Toa.

I know I've said a lot here, but it would be awesome to hear your thoughts on these many unresolved plot points, and whether or not you will address them in your narrative somehow, be it in passing, or in some detail.

"The Golden being, his arrival heralded in Skakdi legends, takes the name of prophecy: IRNAKK, THE MASTER OF NIGHTMARES."
NickOnPlanetRipple's avatar
Believe me, I will take some time to address certain loose ends from the later serials, if only to show where some of the characters we don't see on Nova Orbis may've ended up.
joztxd's avatar
i think this story will make a great movie :)
Avalaxy11's avatar
Avalaxy11Student Digital Artist
I've loved every bit of this story so far.  Can't wait until next year!
taconui's avatar
This whole series is amazing! I just read through all 24 chapters in about an hour or two, I couldn't stop reading once I discovered the first chapter. I loved everything about the story and the characters you created, and the drawings really helped bring it to life. I can't wait to see where you go with this in the future!
IbenTesara's avatar
Loved it ! I can't wait to read about the new year, to see what happened to the Toa Miro as I love the whole "Hero goes bad"-vibe. I think we never saw this enough in the old days, we never really got to see what would happen if one Toa Team would be forced to fight another one.

I'm having a hard time trying to figure out what species Voima is, though I kinda get the feeling she's a Skakdi ?
EDIT: Yeah I must have read over the part where you described her xD I based my thoughts on the drawing, but the descriptions says it all :P

Anyway, wonderful ending to an amazing story, well done !
lillyseven7's avatar
I think she is a skakdi since only they have sharp spines razor teeth and red eyes
toalorikan626's avatar
This was such an awesome story, great year it has been :), sad to know that we have to wait again but I love the feeling all the same. You know I kinda see some paralels of ulito and another character from the Halo series the Didact how he sees the matoran as scum like the forerunner and how his body structure looks like a fearce version of the race he's apart of like the comparison of dogs and wolves
ToaAerrow's avatar
ToaAerrowHobbyist Writer
Great story, can't wait for the next one!
I like how your doing an arc-per-year type format, like BIONICLE does (or at least, it did in it's original run).
Unexpected and complicated new developments. I'm excited to see where they lead!
Also, I'm glad you're not just finishing with just this one story, as I was worried you were going to do. More excitement, interest, and entertainment for us!
KUTGW!
(Keep Up The Good Work)
TheICombaticon's avatar
TheICombaticonHobbyist General Artist
Clap Clap Clap Clap Clap Clap 

As you said: it's been a good first year.

Honestly, I always preferred to lump Ahkmou and Silva together under the "herterosexual male couple" trope due to how they interacted throughout this year (E.g. Egoraptor and Jontron during their run together on Game Grumps; like they're not gay, but they're just really "comfortable" around each other) 
NickOnPlanetRipple's avatar
Thanks. You may want to re-read the part where Albus talks to Ahkmou in a moment, though. Some really important dialog ran off the page, and I've fixed it just now.
Glenfoxx's avatar
GlenfoxxHobbyist General Artist
Awesome. Just awesome.
anonymous's avatar
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