literature

from the suicide note of Adam Kreiger

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neon-ballroom's avatar
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Literature Text

''To the God, if he does exist,
who chose to play a cruel, cruel joke on me
when he placed me where he did and surrounded me with so many uncaring faces''


"I am leaving a world to which I never truly belonged or fit in. Do not weep for me, or mourn my passing. I say this not because I expect to be missed, but to allow those who truly did not care go on with their lives with a clean conscience and dry eyes. I know you don’t want to weep for me. So don’t. But I do ask you to listen to the final words of a young man who has taken charge of his own destiny" 


"I do not know if what awaits me at the end of this gun. Will there be a void? Or will I come face to face with God? I just don’t care any more. If you’re anything like your people, I wouldn’t want to know you. You preached to love one another, yet I’ve felt everything except love from Christians. Even if I could know you were different, well, I still reject you. You have left your “followers” to treat people like me poorly. You have allowed so many of the people you “love”, including me, to suffer. So you want me to trust you with my life? I don’t want to spend eternity with a careless deity like you, or with the company you keep"

"perhaps the sacrifice of one might bring hope to others. If my death makes life for one person a little more bearable, or a little more enlightened, do I really die in vain?"


"As my final moments tick away, I wonder what impact these words will create. It depends first on this web site being found, as I doubt whether school administration will want such venom spoken publicly about their lack of caring. Still, the Internet is a remarkable place where even the least significant individual can be heard. Will anyone listen? Will anyone take action? Will students pause and pay attention to the hurting hearts around them? And even if they do, will it be a temporary salve for their egos, to convince themselves they’re really not bad people or will real change happen?"
© 2017 - 2024 neon-ballroom
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PleaseImJustaGirl's avatar
 Suicide is a Permanent Solution to a Temporary Problem.
Please forgive Me if you don't Agree.