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DBX: Shaggy Rogers VS Madara Uchiha

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The ninja battlefield.

    Cold.

    Empty.

    Not a single soul seemed to be stirring.

    A great battle, a turning point of the Great Ninja War, was waged here. Madara Uchiha stood among the nothing that remained. All around him, dust, broken lumber, fire. It seemed he had won in his battle against the Five Kage, and without breaking a sweat. No one from the Five Nations was alive around him.

    Or so he thought.

    The Five Kage, defeated, but not dead, rose from the rubble. The pain on their faces could be felt for miles, and Madara basked in it.

    “This is it...” An old man now floating in the air said aloud. The defeated appearance of the Third Tsuchikage. “Madara’s won.”

    A tall figure, on his knees, punched the ground in anger. His skin was a dark brown, covered in bruises and newly formed scars from the battle. His normally white coat had a large blood stain on it on the back. This was the defeated face of the Fourth Raikage. “There’s no way!”

    “He did it...” A tall woman, her green coat tattered and her gray top underneath torn, admitted quietly to herself. The defeated appearance of the Fifth Hokage.

    The face of a tired red haired man, a symbol on the left of his forehead signifying a mother’s love, grunted to himself in frustration. The failed face of the Fifth Kazekage.

    “It... can’t...” A female voice stuttered, beginning to weep. She wore a now torn blue dress, her hair, once styled, now fell down freely from her head, almost covering her face completely. The defeated appearance of the Fifth Mizukage.

    After they all had their chance to react, Madara stifled a laugh. Throughout their entire battle, he had not even been damaged once. “This is the end of your pitiful stand up.”

    Ōnoki, the Third Tsuchikage, at last asked out loud, “Why...”

    “...is there anyone... ANYONE... who can possibly even TOUCH Madara Uchiha...?”

    Gaara, the Fifth Kazekage, added onto this slowly. “Let alone... defeat him.”

    A long silence settled in. The weight of their failure felt crushing to them, yet they stood tall as Madara slowly walked towards them, likely about to end all of their lives.

    “Like, that’d be me.” A confident but shrill-sounding voice answered.

    The scene froze. The sound of swirling dust seemed to completely drown out everything else. From a cloud of dust just behind Madara, a silhouette of a lanky man around the Raikage or Madara’s stature began to emerge. He wore baggy pants, a pea-soup green T-shirt, had a head of messy hair on him, a small goatee, and two piercing silver eyes.

    Madara turned to see the one who dared to oppose him, unflinching at his intimidating presence.

    “Oh? You seem foreign.” Madara noticed. “I’m sure if you’re any different from the Five Kage, you’ll at least be entertaining.”

    “You got five seconds to choose, punk.” Shaggy began. “Either you walk away, or I’ll walk on your face.”

    To answer this question, Madara’s entire body cloaked itself in a massive, flaming blue aura, one of a towering samurai well over fifty feet tall. This was Madara’s Susano’o. Using one of its four arms, the Susano’o swung its massive blade at Shaggy, only for Shaggy to react by holding up one arm, perfectly stopping the sword from hitting him.

    “I see this will be a challenge.” Madara grinned.

HERE WE GOOO!

    Madara Uchiha began this new fight by testing his opponent’s potential. With lightning fast swings, Susano’o attempted to slice this casual-looking opponent in two, but these attacks were trivial to Shaggy. Dodging with amazing finesse and skill, Shaggy taunted his opponent while he moved.

    “Is that all you can do?”

    Madara did not react. This was only the beginning of his abilities. Believe me, look at this fucking list.

187571d1-c221-4f04-9d13-bdc9c7429a4b by Nekroz-of-Mokey

    Who writes this shit, Jesus Christ.

    Madara summoned forth a little more power and speed to try and gauge just exactly what he was dealing with. Unfortunately for him, Shaggy was already tired of these games. Grabbing onto the fiery blue sword of the Susano’o as soon as it was swung towards him, Shaggy quickly yanked it out of the giant’s hands and swung at the large blue spirit with a mighty slice, immediately bisecting it.

    Madara’s Susano’o was instantly broken, but his spirit was not.

    “Very impressive...” Madara commented with his eyes widened in shock. “You’re far more of a challenge than any of the Kage.”

    Shaggy scoffed. “This isn’t even 1% of 1% of 1% of my power, kid.”

    Madara chuckled. “I could say the same to you.”

    Madara quickly weaved an array of handsigns faster than any human could react. Upon doing so, he pressed his hand on the ground, and a summoning circle spawned beneath it.

    “Wood Style: Deep Forest Emergence!”

    From beneath their feet, a familiar tactic Madara just used before in the battle against the five legendary fighters was used once more. A massive, gnarly tree rose from beneath them, using the ground as a perfect platform, approaching sky high heights in seconds. Not a single soul could reach them as soon as they exited the atmosphere and reached the depths of outer space.

    Shaggy scratched his head. “This is kinda dumb.”

    “Silence.” Madara demanded. “It’s time you meet an early grave.”

    “No, I’m just saying, this is really dumb.”

    “Sh-shut up!”

    “Dude, come on, have a bit of self-awarene-“

    “I said sh-shut up!!”

    “Madara, are you okay?”

    “No, just leave me aLONE-“

    Trying to suppress his true feelings from his opponent, Madara summoned one of his many stands, King Crimson, and deleted the past few seconds from existence, making the conversation never happen. That’s not really how King Crimson works, but Madara probably maybe has an ability that does something similar maybe probably.

    “Huh? When did we get up here?” Shaggy said, looking around quietly.

    “Your despair.” Madara answered.

    Throwing out several Yasaka Magatama at his opponent, Shaggy had no choice but to start fighting without knowing what was going on. Shaggy avoided each shuriken-like projectile that was nearly the size of him, but as soon as they passed him by, they exploded into massive, colorful balls of destruction the size of city blocks. Deciding now that he had to break out some techniques of his, Shaggy tried something new by charging a purple ray of power in his palms.

    “Like...” Shaggy began, gathering the ki in his hands. “Gallick Gun!!!”

    Letting his hands loose in front of him, a massive beam of energy erupted from his palms. To protect himself, Madara formed just the skeleton of Susano’o in a planck instant (thanks to Sharingan, Rinnegan, Byakugan, Geass powers, Future vision from Steven Universe, scrying powers, tarot cards, and a palmistry reading he got when he was just a young child predicting this exact event would happen to him) to shield himself from the massive ray of power. After just a few seconds, the skeleton began to crack under the ungodly high pressure. Relenting to the attack at last, the Susano’o skeleton exploded into shards, causing the beam to hit Madara dead on. At last, it was proven. There IS a character that can possibly even touch Madara Uchiha.

    But the question remained, could he defeat him?

    While Shaggy would have normally done insane amounts of damage in that one, all-out attack, Madara regenerated from literal nonexistence after he was atomized and promptly erased from existence. It seems Shaggy would need to go even further beyond to defeat this foe.

    Madara decided to try a more hands on approach. Entering the Speedforce, Shaggy now seemed completely frozen in time to him. Running at a couple sexsexagintillion times faster than light, (the best number) rivaling Lucifer Morningstar’s Sunday best speed, Madara manipulated his molecules in such a way that he would perfectly pass through Shaggy and hopefully tear him apart, particle by particle.

    So he did exactly that.








    And nothing happened.

    “What...?”

    As soon as he exited the Speedforce, not only was all of Shaggy still intact, but he was not even changed in the slightest bit from what Madara could see.

    “You keep trying all these moves.” Shaggy pointed out. “Why don’t you fight up close with me like a real man?”

    Madara obliged, if only to save his pride.

    Casually breaking the time barrier, (that exists shut the fuck up) the two did a bunch of really repetitive and boring JoJo punches that are not funny parody and are actually an entry level reference. Jesus Christ this is painful

    The two made contact with each other multiple times, but neither seemed to be fazed from the attacks. At last, the clash seemed to end when Shaggy socked Madara with all his might in the face, forcing him to the other side of the platform, facefirst in the dirt.

    Madara got up, somewhat sore from the exchange, but was nonetheless grinning and giggling.

    “I’ve hit you in your vital pressure points. There is no way you’ll live to see the next picoseconds. You’re already dead.” The master of Hokuto Shinken grinned.

    “No u” Shaggy said.

    Madara’s eyes widened. “He knows the Secret Technique...!!”

    At a speed so great it actually happened in the past and not the present, Madara exploded instead of his opponent, but don’t you worry your pretty little face, because he regenerated immediately after. I am a very original and not tired writer that does not need to go to bed

    Madara growled, frustrated by these humiliations. “Alright, no more games. This ends now!”

    Shaggy thought aloud while he stroked his goatee. And his dick. “Why now specifically?”

    “You’ve upset me now. Also, because the author doesn’t know what to do anymore. Also, why are you jerking off in front of me ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew”

    In a massive explosion of light, with radiance so brilliant it cannot be captured with pitiful and weak words, Madara assumed his Ultimate form.

    Sage mode sage of the six paths Juubi Jinchuuriki Gedou Rinne Tensei Legendary Super Saiyan 4 Uchiha Madara with the Eternal Mangekyou Sharingan, Rinnegan, Mystic Eyes of Death Perception, and Geass doujutsus, equipped with his Shining Trapezohedron while casting Super Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann as his Susanoo, controlling the Gold Experience Requiem stand, having become the original vampire after having absorbed Alucard as well as a God Hand, able to tap into the speedforce, wearing the Kamen Rider Black RX suit, with Kryptonian DNA implanted in him and having eaten Popeye's spinach while possessing quantum powers like Dr. Manhattan and having mastered Hokuto Shinken.

    Please take a break from reading right now to try and imagine what that looks like because it’ll be a cold day in hell when I describe that to you in words.






    Is that long enough

    Okay good

    Shaggy understood that he could no longer hold back either if he wanted to save the Ninja World. At this very moment, he was not using his fully mastered form of Ultra Instinct yet. It seemed that this fight would push him over the limit, though.

   “Alright...” Shaggy began. “Get ready...”

    Standing in a squat as he began to power up, a towering aura of ki larger than the solar system surrounded him. Shaggy’s hair began to glow a bright hue of grey, or perhaps a very pure white. He was beginning to be flooded with more power than ever before. At last, the DeviantArt recolor transformation was completed.

    Mastered Ultra Instinct Shaggy stood before Sage mode sage of the six paths Juubi Jinchuuriki Gedou Rinne Tensei Legendary Super Saiyan 4 Uchiha Madara with the Eternal Mangekyou Sharingan, Rinnegan, Mystic Eyes of Death Perception, and Geass doujutsus, equipped with his Shining Trapezohedron while casting Super Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann as his Susanoo, controlling the Gold Experience Requiem stand, having become the original vampire after having absorbed Alucard as well as a God Hand, able to tap into the speedforce, wearing the Kamen Rider Black RX suit, with Kryptonian DNA implanted in him and having eaten Popeye's spinach while possessing quantum powers like Dr. Manhattan and having mastered Hokuto Shinken at last.

    With no words left for each other, (I’ve run out of funny dialogue worth a damn) the two clashed with power that would easily destroy the planet, but somehow it literally does no collateral damage whatsoever since this is a loose Dragon Ball parody.

   The multi-galaxy sized TTGL Susano’o proved powerful with its massive drill and literal quasiquintillions (super rad number I just made up) of probability missiles being fired, but Shaggy easily powered through those meager defenses. It was up to his powers of Dr. Manhattan, the Speedforce, Popeye’s Spinach, his Schrodinger powers, his Great Spirit, his Geass powers, his ability to use Fire, Wood, Water, Lightning, and Earth style, his ability to tap into the Speedforce, his Kryptonian DNA, and his ability to fold paper napkins really well now.

    Using all of his might, with every ounce of power he had, Madara unleashed a massive barrage of attacks that enveloped the observable universe and beyond with so much matter that this fight might as well have been over something besides a small planet. In a flash of light so bright that not even Shaggy nor Madara could see each other, the two had to wait for what seemed to be an eternity to regain their vision.

    When at last they did, the fate of the battle was sealed.

    Regular Ultra Instinct still activated, Shaggy stood tall, still burning energy. Madara, without a single bit of Chakra left, stood as well, not looking as proud as he did at the beginning.

    To his surprise, Shaggy’s UI deactivated, and he fell to the ground.

    The ground began to crumble beneath him. Shaggy was now hanging on to a ledge for dear life. Madara approached him slowly.

    Shaggy began to remember all the memories of his life. All the people.

    The gang.

0056acca-7250-4035-9d68-0b81cb28c3f6 by Nekroz-of-Mokey

    The Mystery Machine.

Ff9a8e5f-acbd-4db3-97ae-21451b9716d9 by Nekroz-of-Mokey

    Velma.

Ffe51e74-97fe-4c3f-9914-0d31af1f037a by Nekroz-of-Mokey

    And most of all, the one thing he would miss the most,

    The Scooby Snacks.

656f6da5-72d4-4f05-811b-63b8bc5ba744 by Nekroz-of-Mokey

    The Scooby Snacks.

    No more Scooby Snacks.

    THAT TEARS IT.


    He couldn’t give up now. Not when so much was at stake. Shaggy charged up what remained of his energy and tried to hoist himself back onto the ledge to land something fatal on his opponent. Maybe he could Hakai him to death once he got up there. Whatever it was, it was worth a try. Madara was only one step away from him, and he had to think of something quick-

    Madara used Luigi’s Down Taunt from Super Smash Bros and Shaggy fucking died lol

DBX
Happy fun safe adventure for kids and the whole family. Philosophical, educational, and fun.
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© 2018 - 2020 Nekroz-of-Mokey
Comments13
anonymous's avatar
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Kredory's avatar
RIP Shaggy for MK11

Btw great DBX
Nekroz-of-Mokey's avatar
Nekroz-of-MokeyHobbyist Writer
It's weird because I didn't actually start it but I take full credit and give me all the money, memers, this announcement is an executive order, thank you
ZapikNunciateKnuncia's avatar
MY CHILDHOOD HAS BEEN DESTROYED! 
ShadowFrost1's avatar
Sorry I only got Monopoly money and "Exposure". Is that good enough?
ShadowFrost1's avatar
dis is epic

No seriously
Caesar9999's avatar
I thought Madara was gonna use the ancient Joestar technique? 

www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXXIjF…
BladeSmith55's avatar
BladeSmith55Student Traditional Artist
I AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIM gonna take that one sitting down
Br3ndan5's avatar
Br3ndan5Hobbyist Writer
Shaggy didn't slaughter Madara in one second

0/1000
ragazz's avatar
epic. i was sure that ultra instinct shaggy would take it tho....
Bigdaddy9716's avatar
Bigdaddy9716Student Writer
April fools?
masterofhorr's avatar
masterofhorrStudent
Lol
Demarlion's avatar
ITSAMASTERPIECE
anonymous's avatar
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