Beautiful in Hijab

AsSalamu Alaykum WaRahamtullah
MashaAllah brother very well done. I’v always been a fan of your art, and now your poetry. I will give a little critique since this is your first poem and since I myself write Islamic poems. It is also my first time critiquing so here it goes ^_^

I have to agree with the first critique. In most poetry it is very rare that people use words such as “She’s” They would rather write it “She is” and this will also keep the words consistent.

So for example you wrote:
“She’s a Muslim Girl
She is a real Pearl.”
You can also write it as,
“She is a Muslim Girl
She is a real Pearl.” Notice each line has five words now…You might even say “Who is a real pearl” if you didn’t want to keep repeating “she”

And I noticed that you want to rhyme at the end of every line, I loved this part very much

“In her they see oppression
and backward discrimination
they throw their accusation
not hearing her explanation”

You are rhyming here and you are getting your point across, which is very good b/c for many people it is hard to do that. They will rhyme but it makes no sense and there is no meaning behind it, just words that rhyme and that is not what poetry is all about.

Repetition is good to sometimes, there is nothing wrong with it, but it is usually done if it is a song. If it is for poetry sometimes it makes the poem boring, since you are just repeating. Make it creative and unique. Like critique 1 said find a structure to follow, maybe every other line can rhyme or every other two or three lines can rhyme.

Also some words may have the same ending but may not always rhyme, For example:

“She's not a scarecrow
She's brighter than snow
very little do they know
the freedom she has now” <---- You started that off very well, but at the end “Now” does not rhyme with “Know” even though they may have same letters at the end. And when this happens the rhythm of the poem gets lost.

You might have reworded to something like this

"She is not a scarecrow
she is brighter than the snow
very little do they know
about the freedom that she shows"

Also I really like this part, but again the last line does not go with the flow.

“Freedom to her Allah gave
To only him she is a slave
She's nice and always brave
Islam is her way of life” <--- "For Allah is her only crave"

I hope my critique is not harsh. Everything else mashaAllah I really like. I, myself am a beginner as well, and I have much more to learn. I’ll be looking forward to more of your art and poetry inshaAllah <img src="e.deviantart.net/emoticons/s/s…" width="15" height="15" alt="" title=" (Smile)"/> Keep up the great work. May Allah swt reward you for all the dawah work you do. Ameen!