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My art piece "Sleeping Eye Pod" is in my merch' stores.  :-D

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#DeviantArt #Redbubble #Art #Merch #Eye #Eyelashes #Wings #Ribbons
I'm never doing traditional work in my life ever again. Why?

Autism impacts my life in a lot of ways. My moods and motivations shift and swing around so frequently. Often, I don't even know who I am.

My personality is wildly inconsistent, and I hate it. Fairly frequently, I question my identity. Who am I really? What bugs me to a ridiculous degree one day, will hardly bother me another day. This inconsistency is infuriating.

I regularly cannot control how happy, sad, or neutral I am. Sometimes I'm full of energy, other times I'm utterly drained.

I yearn for a consistent mood and constant motivation, yet a regular lack of control over my brain's mood constantly persists, and it's incredibly aggravating.

Imagine all of the above in a work environment. Exactly, fuck that. I will fight to continue my self-employment art work for the rest of my life.

What really pisses me off is this: If I was suicidal, more people would be quick to not pressure me into any work whatsoever...

... However, because I'm "only Autistic", I sometimes feel pressured into jobs that will just not work out. I want this toxic mentality to end; adult does not necessarily equal fit for work, and it's about time more people realised this. There's so much more to the picture.

That's all I've got to say on this matter at the moment. I may make follow-up posts to this, and I may not. I don't know.



My art piece "Weathered Crescent" is in my merch' stores.  :-D

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My art piece "Spotlight Shell" is in my merch' stores.  :-D

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My art piece "Log On Fire" is in my merch' stores.  :-D

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My art piece "Genie's Forgotten Waterworks." is in my merch' stores.  :-D

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My art piece "Thermometer Exclamation" is in my merch' stores.  :-D

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My art piece "Wrecked Window - Pane Pain" is in my merch' stores.  :-D

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My art piece "Palm Atop The Rugged Embankment" is in my merch' stores. :-D

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Due to being stressed recently, I felt the need to record me venting about my worries, frustrations, and other feelings.


After watching this video, I have discovered that it unfortunately contains unintended portions of black screens.

The audio commentary is the main focus here, and I am stressed enough as it is right now, so I am not going to bother with trying to fix the visual issues. Sorry!



● IMPORTANT NOTES

○ Please bear these notes in mind regarding the entire commentary.

1: This video contains a significant amount of vulgar language. I do not typically have a very harsh attitude, however this recording was done during a time where I am very stressed, so my commentary is more aggressive than usual. I have the best intentions and interests at heart.

2: I am not well versed with on the spot commentary, particularly while being recorded, so significant gaps between speech is quite frequent. I stutter/stammer a fair bit too.

3: Due to speaking on the fly with no script, and also being inexperienced with live commentary recordings, the topics that I rant and ramble about dart around all over the place. Additionally, some points are repeated more than once.

4: I have no hate or ill will towards anyone who I criticise in my commentary. My aim is to attack the points themselves, and not the people from which the points originate from.

5: I want to keep my commentary feeling raw/real, and not manufactured. To this end, I have refrained from making significant edits. (No big gaps edited out between speech, for example.





#Autism #ASD   #AutismSpectrumDisorder   #AspergersSyndrome   #MentalHealth #WorkLife   #Stress   #Anxiety   #Depression   #Commentary   #Vent   #Rant

Due to being stressed recently, I felt the need to record me venting about my worries, frustrations, and other feelings.


After watching this video, I have discovered that it unfortunately contains unintended portions of black screens, as well as some flickering oddities.

Considering that this video was already a pain to render correctly (I had to re-render this video, due to MAGIX VEGAS Pro 14.0 crashing [After 24+ hours of patience!] during a previous render attempt at 99% completion.) I am not going to bother re-rendering yet again and re-uploading the video.

The audio commentary is the main focus here, and I am stressed enough as it is right now, so I am not going to bother with trying to fix the visual issues. Sorry!



● IMPORTANT NOTES

○ Please bear these notes in mind regarding the entire commentary.

1: This video contains a significant amount of vulgar language. I do not typically have a very harsh attitude, however this recording was done during a time where I am very stressed, so my commentary is more aggressive than usual. I have the best intentions and interests at heart.

2: I am not well versed with on the spot commentary, particularly while being recorded, so significant gaps between speech is quite frequent. I stutter/stammer a fair bit too.

3: Due to speaking on the fly with no script, and also being inexperienced with live commentary recordings, the topics that I rant and ramble about dart around all over the place. Additionally, some points are repeated more than once.

4: I have no hate or ill will towards anyone who I criticise in my commentary. My aim is to attack the points themselves, and not the people from which the points originate from.

5: I want to keep my commentary feeling raw/real, and not manufactured. To this end, I have refrained from making significant edits. (No big gaps edited out between speech, for example.)


○ Additional Note:

For the first part of my rant, I have made one edit to my commentary.

At some point, I accidentally blurted out somebody's name in the spur of the moment, and I didn't actually consciously realise until afterwards when I played back my rants, and discovered it then.

As such, I have edited out the name, and put a censor beep in there in its place, so that's what the censor beep is for. Other than that though, my commentary is unedited.





I'm in the process of rendering 2 new YouTube videos. Due to being stressed recently, I felt the need to record me venting about my worries, frustrations, and other feelings.

These videos are each over 1 hour long, so it will be some time until they're uploaded and available.


My art piece "E-vase-ive Action" is in my merch' stores. :-D

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My art piece "Curly Bloboy" is in my merch' stores.  :-D

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#DeviantArt #Redbubble #Art #Merch #Blob #Curls #Loop #Smile
I have decided to scrap specific upload schedule dates.

Recently, I have been producing new art more frequently. I would rather upload art as and when it is complete. Going forward, I aim to upload more art each week.

That said, expect new art very soon!  :-D
Father's Day, a family member's birthday, me going to the doctors, and everything surrounding E3's events... It has been a busy week or so, and after taking a break from art, I have resumed drawing.

Apologies for the period of inactivity; new art uploads are coming shortly!  :-D

Amongst the recent Pokémon Quest, Pokémon Let's Go and 1997 Beta Pokémon buzz, here's a mashup I made of the Gym music tracks from Pokémon Black/White and X/Y.  :-)





#ArtistsOnFacebook   #PokemonQuest   #PokemonLetsGo   #Pokemon1997   #BetaPokemon   #PokemonBlack   #PokemonWhite   #PokemonX   #PokemonY   #Music   #Mashup

I spent the past few days trying to relax and de-stress.

I think that I am starting to feel better now. My current priority is to get back into the groove of working on my art regularly.

I'll see how things pan out over the next week or so. I've recently backed out of doing a lot of additional work, so hopefully I don't get stressed as much again.  :-)
After reconsidering what is reasonable for me to produce on a regular basis, I have decided to scale back on the amount of deadlines that I give myself.

So, going forward, my new art upload schedule is as follows:

1 new A5 drawing every 2 weeks, and 1 new A4 drawing every 2 weeks, uploaded on Sundays, running in a hit-one miss-one style. This means that one Sunday there will be a new A5 drawing, then next Sunday there will be a new A4 drawing, then next Sunday there will be a new A5 drawing, and so on as the cycle loops.


As for photography, this involves considerably less reliability for consistent uploads. This is because there are many more variables in the outdoor environment, which are factors in whether or not I happen to take any photographs that I decide are worth uploading.

Due to unreliable conditions and scenarios that may result in suboptimal photograph opportunities, I have decided to scrap photography entirely from any upload schedules. I still plan to upload new photographs as and when good photography moments arise, just don't expect 1 new photograph per month as previously planned.


These new deadlines should be a better fit for me, and relieve some of my stress, as I will not feel pressured to produce content as frequently as before. This new art upload schedule will come into effect on Sunday 03 June 2018.


A big thank you to everyone for your continued support.  :-)



I would like to deeply apologise for not sticking to my new art upload schedule as I intended to.

Settling into self-employment, along with other recent things, and trying to stick to my own art deadlines for the first time, have all been severely stressing me out.

As a result, I have fallen significantly behind schedule with my art. I am not in a good head space right now, so it's best for me to not comment further about future art uploads at this time.

Again, I'm very sorry for the lack of art uploads. I am determined to work something out here, and will update about this some time soon-ish.