H
literature

Here's Your Map

Muzica-chan's avatar
By Muzica-chan   |   Watch
5 5 285 (1 Today)
Published: November 22, 2012
It's on the left, fourteen doors down
You can show yourself out

It's not that I don't want you
Not saying that I do
I just can see through you
And it makes me sort of blue

Teehee
Haha
I rhyme~
Something, something time!

Sarcasm, spite, cynical dismissal
I'm waving goodbye eagerly~
I can see that you're sick of me!
Here is your invitation to leave!

Because just because you don't say it
Doesn't mean it isn't said
Because just because you can't voice it
Doesn't mean I don't hear it

Loud and clearly captain!

Your half hidden bitchiness isn't missed
It has been noted with vague interest
I just can't really seem to give a shit
Something, something it!

Gotta keep up the rhyme
Each word in place at the right
Time

Oppz, fucked up
Just like everything else
Oh well
It'll still sell

Now, I'm sure you're tired of trying
I'm certain you're confused
You've always put forth kindness
Something I've refused

Even when you're angry
You front like you're not
But if you take a moment
You'll realize you've been caught

If you're done, it's a short walk
A right and three left clicks

Maybe I'm just overreacting
I tend to do it
But I am done with it
Forced friendship

It seems to me the more I try
The less I like
So I'm just sticking with goodbye
Alright?

Now, I won't be pushing you away
But I won't be saying hello today
[or tomorrow or the next day]
I will attempt to be friendly
Until the inclination goes away

Fake, false, faux, pretend
I don't want to be those again
I like you well enough, I suppose
But all good things must come to a close

You've not worn out your welcome
You're not no longer wanted here
I just won't be tolerating your shit
I won't be coddling you, m'dear

It's not that far to escape
Just a few seconds then you're always away

Maybe coddle isn't quite right
Because with me, it's always a fight
I snap, swear, huff, glare, and bite
So quick to set things alight

I like my isolation
I like my distant friends
I like one or two close to me
And that is where it ends

So I've been trying to adjust
To fall in love and love myself
But with Desa never far away
Some things must come off the shelf

Throw away the old pictures of us
Forget me completely if you must

Because Desa, Hin, and Bambi are here to stay
The rest of you can find your way
Fourteen doors down
One right click and three left
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B
Broken
Something in my brain I am told is broken, dysfunctional. It leaves me inept when left to deal with language unspoken, the intricacies of smiles, the unclear line between malice and mirth. It may have been the shot given by the doctor meant to protect but somehow doing harm, and ignoring the Hippocratic oath. Or so say my parents, their organization, so they may be exonerated. They liken me to Ted Bundy, H. H. Holmes, and Einstein. Because a sometimes-flat affect is abnormal, and it makes people uncomfortable. Especially when it is not maintained. At times I am too broken to understand and sometimes I am not broken enough because my pu
T
The Clash
Take that feeling of hopelessness And wipe it from your face That frown will get you nowhere, And yet nowhere you will go. Listen to the snow that breathes On this glacial mountaintop. The summit watches you, and it Laughs at your marked cowardice. It is telling you to turn away, For the God that rests atop this crest Holds a crown of blizzards, The blood of dragons on his collar. Slicing open the girths of faeries That bleed harsh cold and despair. A boy—a sapling—a man like you Could never brave the victorious screams. You trudge onwards, yet, Like the fool that you are. Can you hear that sound, above This b
© 2012 - 2019 Muzica-chan
One the messaging system I talk to the friend this is directed at, the fourteenth option is to block someone. You have to right click their name, click the block, click remove from contacts, and then okay it. Fourteenth door, one right click and three left.

Lately, a friend of mine has been pushing not only me, but several of our other friends away. For reasons I don't feel like sharing, I've been blaming myself for this. I keep trying to be friendly and draw her back in, but sometimes, I just can't help myself. At my very core, I am and will always be an indifferent bitch. If you aren't part of my triad, I can't seem to care for long. My triad changes occasionally. Like, growing up with Hin in a different state, it was Alex, myself, and Steven. When Hin moved back, it was Alex, myself, and Hin. As Alex and I drifted apart, my triad took on a point different from before with Hin, myself, and Bambi.

All I need is three. If you don't like me, if you don't want to be around me, allow me to draw the map for the door.

P.S. Of course my first post after an epic vacation is me bitching. xD
Recommended Literature
H
How to be Popular
don’t talk just breathe stand straight smile brightly don’t argue don’t fight don’t cry don’t frown do homework go to parties sneak out get drunk listen to friends go with the flow be silent drink some more don’t let them see the tears as you cry yourself to sleep for the most important thing is to be popular
B
Broken
Something in my brain I am told is broken, dysfunctional. It leaves me inept when left to deal with language unspoken, the intricacies of smiles, the unclear line between malice and mirth. It may have been the shot given by the doctor meant to protect but somehow doing harm, and ignoring the Hippocratic oath. Or so say my parents, their organization, so they may be exonerated. They liken me to Ted Bundy, H. H. Holmes, and Einstein. Because a sometimes-flat affect is abnormal, and it makes people uncomfortable. Especially when it is not maintained. At times I am too broken to understand and sometimes I am not broken enough because my pu
T
The Clash
Take that feeling of hopelessness And wipe it from your face That frown will get you nowhere, And yet nowhere you will go. Listen to the snow that breathes On this glacial mountaintop. The summit watches you, and it Laughs at your marked cowardice. It is telling you to turn away, For the God that rests atop this crest Holds a crown of blizzards, The blood of dragons on his collar. Slicing open the girths of faeries That bleed harsh cold and despair. A boy—a sapling—a man like you Could never brave the victorious screams. You trudge onwards, yet, Like the fool that you are. Can you hear that sound, above This b
Comments5
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LostInTheMorning's avatar
LostInTheMorningHobbyist General Artist
I'd suggest a mature warning for some of the language :XD: but I love it. This poem has a sort of topsy-turvy, I'm a little too high or drunk kind of flow to it. It's very well written.
Muzica-chan's avatar
Punch drunk and high off life was how I was feeling and the emotion I wanted to convey~
And I shall take the warning into consideration ^^
LostInTheMorning's avatar
LostInTheMorningHobbyist General Artist
The emotion was well conveyed. This is seriously one of the coolest poems I've ever read. :D
Muzica-chan's avatar
I thank you for that. It's flattering to hear. >w<
LostInTheMorning's avatar
LostInTheMorningHobbyist General Artist
You are very welcome :D
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