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Zaq gazed down at the ashen face of his husband of twenty years, a painful mix of heartbreak and denial warring across his features. Even as the twenty-five years they had shared repeated in his mind, he could only hear the words of the doctor.

"There is no activity in his brain at all. Even the most basic functions have shut down completely. His chances of recovery are virtually nonexistent. His life is dependent on these machines."

Pressing his lips into a thin line, Zaq fought off tears for the millionth time. Knowing that his partner was a vegetable seemed somehow worse than him being dead, and for the past month, all he had been able to do was cry. He didn't even have the rage to demand which god could be cruel enough to steal Bobby from him.

His own grief was so severe that he had not even been able to comfort his daughter or work at the café. Those two things had been the center of his world for the past eighteen years. Sometimes they had even took preference over Bobby.

Of course, he was supposed to have only been a father for eighteen years, and then their baby girl could move out. They were going to leave café in the care of a manager, while they went on a long, well deserved vacation. They were supposed to have left at the end of this school year, a final family vacation, but they wouldn't return with everyone else. For a few years, it was just going to be them, drifting around Canada and then Europe until they wanted to go home.

They should have had a life time together, not a mere quarter of one.

Zaq would have been a liar to say that he wasn't bitter about that. It was not fair that he had found and married one of the best men, only to lose him so soon, and on their anniversary to boot.

"I could have waited the twenty minutes for you to get home safely," Zaq whispered, brushing Bobby's hair away from his face affectionately. His eyes were warm with a love so overwhelming that he couldn't look away. "I waited nineteen years to meet you and nearly another for you to love me back, didn't I?"

There was no response, and Zaq couldn't even lie himself into believe there might be. The flutter of a pulse was just that. The soft exhale was the mechanical work of his lungs, half prompted by machines. There simply was no response.

Sighing quietly, he settled onto the edge of the uncomfortable bed. He was too weary to stand. It had been another long day, just as each of them had been.

His hands touched the familiar face with the sort of adoration that was rare. Gently, he touched the soft lips that had rarely smiled, brushed over the elegant nose, traced the proud cheek bones, and ghosted across the closed eyes. Memories filled his mind as he felt the warm skin beneath his fingers, and he almost wished it was cool.

The feel reminded him of sweet kisses, loving nuzzles, and eyes as warm as a summer storm.

He had seen rain and he had seen lightning boil in those gray eyes. He had weathered the darkest storms and delighted in the brightest days through those eyes. He escaped reality and he found happiness with those eyes.

Those eyes now haunted his dreams, and one orb of matching hue met him every morning, staring out of their grown daughter's face. She was as pale as both of them and more beautiful than either of them. Even with the strain of her father's death, she still held radiance that was rare for one so young.


"Bobby, I am forty-five years old, and people still hit on me. I didn't realize that until Kegra pointed it out recently. You've been the center of my world for so long...I guess I grew blind," Zaq whispered, forcing a weak chuckle. Still caressing the weak face, he marveled one last time over the fact that he had finally seen his own beauty because of the man before him, only to forget that people other than Bobby could see it as well because of him.

Mr. and Mr. Wolf... He still had trouble believing that was his last name. While he had laughed at his parents outrage of it, he had known it never really suited him. He was truly and totally a cat, maybe not a Felune as was his family name, but a cat all the same. Wolf did not fit him.

It, however, did fit Bobby, and quite well at that. Handsome and strong, he fit the modern idealization of the creature. Sweet and playful, he had a pup hidden inside. Loyal and faithful, he never made Zaq worry even when he was around the most beautiful women. He was a silent wolf that protected Zaq when he needed it the most.

"I could have done better than you, you know," he suddenly declared brashly. Not even once in the twenty-five years had he considered such a thing before. When they first began dating, he had been too giddy, too caught up in childish love. While the immature happiness had faded, the love had not. Unlike with every other relationship Zaq had been in, he never stopped loving Bobby.

Every morning when he woke up, he squeezed his eyes shut and hoped it wasn't a dream. Every day when their gazes met, the world was banished for a long moment like when they first met. Every time they made love, it was like the first time, both of them eager to explore each other and kiss every scar, as if that would make them fade.

Now there were no more morning wishes, no loving and longing glances, and no passionate nights. They were no longer alone together. They were just alone; Bobby hovered on the brink of death, and Zaq went along only half alive.

He had never, even in his worst nightmares, thought it would end up like this. In a great many ways, it was almost painfully fitting.

"I could have married a rich man. Maybe he wouldn't have been as handsome as you, but he'd have been old enough to over look any indiscretions. He might've even knowingly paid for a few. As long as I purred for him, he would've paid for my happiness," Zaq speculated, thinking of his sister's life. Certainly Aelwen was happy enough with her old man.

Rubbing Bobby's shoulders as he had done every night for years, he continued, "Or I could have gotten a man more handsome than you. I am smart enough to know that there are plenty of them. Maybe someone less scarred or more muscular could have stood at my side. Maybe even a Clan leader to start a scandal."

Giving his face a sharp look, Zaq searched desperately for the patient amusement that he knew Bobby would have shown. It made no sense to him why his heart broke again when he couldn't find it.

Swallowing back tears, he declared, his voice agonizingly rough, "Don't think I couldn't have! If I put my mind to it, I could have anything."

'Except having you back... I can't have that, can I?' the broken voice of his heart whispered mournfully.

Biting his lower lip, he swallowed the sharp cry of pain that rose up. It would do no good to start sobbing and make a mess of himself. He wasn't ready for that again, not yet, possibly not ever.

Somewhere, in the back of his head, a voice had wailed blatant denial when he had been told of Bobby's accident. Even now, it showed no sign of lessening. The part of him that couldn't believe Bobby was finally his now couldn't believe that he had been lost.

"I could have had any man, and you could have had any woman. Why did I go for a human that could be broken so easily? Why did you go for a man that is so weak?" Zaq whispered, his voice breaking completely. Leaning forward, he pressed his forehead to Bobby's, still fighting not to cry. His hands gently cupped the cheeks, painfully aware of the pulse that relied on machines to keep going.

Opening his eyes, he wished that he could see those beautiful gray hues one last time. The one thing that they had ever been to argue about was who had prettier eyes. While they didn't necessarily agree on everything, they were both level headed and open minded enough to discuss it. They didn't need to fight. Plus, they got more than enough time fighting just with their friends. It was easy for them to come to a compromise, up until one of them complimented the other's eyes.

Cenas and Kegra had gotten so frustrated because of that. In fact, he could clearly remember them complaining about it the day before the accident, and the memory brought a smile to his face.

"You have prettier eyes, and you can't argue this time," Zaq murmured, his voice rough and tears pooling in his eyes. Kissing Bobby's forehead, he held onto him lightly.

Before coming into the room, he had asked the nurses to leave Bobby alone for the night. Cenas had donated enough money to the hospital that they were willing to break a few rules for their family, and Zaq was grateful for that. He needed some time to mourn on his own.

Kicking his shoes off gently, he slid the rest of the way onto the bed, wrapping an arm around Bobby's waist and nuzzling his face against the slender neck. Sighing softly, he remarked, his heart twisting painfully in his chest as he did so, "Even though we never said it seriously, I think you just might have been my soul mate."

Reaching past Bobby, he wrapped his fingers around the syringe. Sitting up, he began unplugging everything from Bobby slowly and carefully. The doctor had told him that Bobby couldn't feel, hear, or see anything going on. He was dead. Knowing that Bobby wouldn't have to suffer made it easier to cut off his life support. He would finally be free of the body that never let him forget.

For a moment, the azure eyes lingered on the pulse, watching it grow weaker. Shaking himself, he brought the needle to his throat, forcing it beneath the skin. Biting his lip, he braced himself for the pain to come, and then pushed the plunger.

Air went straight into his veins, up to his brain. For a moment, there was agony a thousand times worse than the worst migraine he had suffered. Then, the pain was too much and his mind shut down. No longer in control of his body, he fell across Bobby, dying with the only person he had ever wanted to spend his life with.
The average human being lives to be about 80 years old. The average shifter lives to be 125.

Zaq and Bobby met when Zaq was 19 turning 20, and Bobby had just turned 18. They dated for two, nearly three years before they got engaged. They purchased a cafe, which they owned and ran together. Two years afterwords, they got married. A year or so after that, their daughter was born.

Seventeen, not quite eighteen years later, Bobby got into a car accident.

On the day of their wedding anniversary, Bobby was rushing home from the cafe. He knew Zaq had something planned, and he was close to being late. Zaq was a prompt person, so he didn't want to spoil the evening and rushed, not stopping at a stop sign. He was hit by another speeding car.

It wasn't a fatal car accident, but it might as well have been. The forty-three year old human suffered massive trauma and ended up in a coma. After several CAT scans, it was determined he was brain dead. Even if he physically recovered, he would never wake.

Before Bobby, Zaq had gone from one abusive relationship to the next. Everyone he has ever "loved," hurt him purposefully. The only exception was Kegra, whom he wasn't really involved with.

It was his first good relationship, and the two had such a simple, elementary compatibility that it stayed that way for two and a half decades.

To have it end so abruptly was tragic enough. It was enough to break Zaq's spirit and make him numb inside. Except, it wasn't just over. Bobby's heart was still beating, but he was gone.

They expected Zaq to be the one to man up and give the okay for them to cut off the life support. They expected him to give them the okay to kill Bobby. They expected him to be strong enough to let go.

He couldn't. He simply couldn't.

As much as he loved his child and loved his life, he could not let go of Bobby.

Rather than drag it out and torture all off them, he sat his daughter down and explained this to her. Lei wasn't even eighteen at the time, but as Zaq spoke to her, she realized what he was getting at quickly. Hugging him, she promised that she'd take care of the shop and that she'd always love him and her papa.

He told all of them in his own way. He said he was leaving, and he apologized. Cenas and Rekon understood. Kegra went into denial about it, convincing himself that Zaq was going on a vacation.

That's a story for another time though. In the end, Zaq made peace with his loved ones and then joined Bobby on the other side.


NOT CANON! \owo/ WHOO~ Hin killed Bobby off, so I turned around and wrote this. It upset her so much that we agreed it wasn't canon. Zaq gets his lifetime with Bobby and the two pass on together in their sleep. Epic. Cheese.

Also, since it is no longer canon, I didn't bother to edit and add in that they have a second child. Two years after Lei is born, they adopt a son.

So, even /if/ they did this, Lei would have a big brother she could depend on. Zaq is still a horrible parent.

Enjoy the feels. \owo/ xD
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:iconhinfallend:
Hinfallend Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
WHY IS THIS BACK?!! :iconcryingplz:
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:iconmuzica-chan:
Muzica-chan Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2013
Cause I had to share it D:
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:iconhinfallend:
Hinfallend Featured By Owner Jan 21, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
;A;
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:icondigiman96:
Digiman96 Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013
I've never read the original story but this practically brought me to tears. I feel so bad for Zaq. That's a horrible way to lose the person you love.

It was written really well. Good story. Where is the original story?
Reply
:iconmuzica-chan:
Muzica-chan Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013
In all honesty, it is the worst way I can imagine. It's like choosing to say goodbye.

Thank you so much. Unfortunately, the original story is still a work in progress.
Reply
:icondigiman96:
Digiman96 Featured By Owner Jan 22, 2013
Aww well whenever the original is posted I would really like to know. This short story wa very moving and brought tears to my eyes.
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:iconimchangingmahname:
ImChangingMahName Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013
This is a canon pairing? From what?

I love the concept of it all, I love their love, I love how they complimented each others eyes...This has probably got to be the best thing I've read in all my life, and I speak of that from the heart and soul. It was so touching...if only I had a boyfriend like that, and at the end...when Zaq cut off Bobby's life support machine...and took his own life, it was just like the real, modern version of Romeo and Juliet...I just wanted to cry, at it all. You couldn't have written this any better. Thanks for this spectacular piece.

Usually, I'm a tough cookie, but you've cracked me.
Reply
:iconmuzica-chan:
Muzica-chan Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013
:XD: It is an original pairing written by my friend *Hinfallend and myself. They are, eventually, going to be in a multi-book series.

Out of all of the pairings I have, Zaq and Bobby are by and far the most dependent on each other. [link] This piece sort of explains their dependency on each other and why they are so wrapped up in each other.
I am so intensely flattered by your praise. Like, I've never felt so complimented before. Thank you. <3

xD I tend to get misty eyed when I reread this piece. I poured a lot of angst into it.
Reply
:iconimchangingmahname:
ImChangingMahName Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2013
No problem :)

By the way, it there any pictures of this couple, and maybe their family and friends? I'd love to see what they look like.

I shall praise this forever, don't you forget it
:worship:~Muzica-chan is god!
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:iconmuzica-chan:
Muzica-chan Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2013
[link] This is some of the art I have of them. Friends have drawn fan art, and I have commissioned some pieces. xD

>w< I'm so flattered. I cannot even. Thank you
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:iconimchangingmahname:
ImChangingMahName Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2013
Ahh, they're such a cute couple. They deserve each other. I take it Bobby's the one with the Blonde and blue longish hair?

No problem. After this amazing piece you've written, you deserve to be flattered.
Reply
:iconmuzica-chan:
Muzica-chan Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2013
Zaq is the one with longer hair, while Bobby has the short gray hair. The redhead male in some of the pictures is Kegra, while the female is Cenas. The black haired male is Rekon, while the black haired female is his daughter Trinity (not in many of the pictures). Lei, Zaq and Bobby's daughter, is in the picture with Trinity. [link] There is more of them. xD; I am actually sorting all of the art I have of them now.

>///< My head is going to get so big if you keep talking to me like that.
Reply
:iconimchangingmahname:
ImChangingMahName Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2013
Wow, you got quite a nice cast of characters there.

Well I won't stop talking like that to ya until you're famous, so suck it up, buttercup! xD

*talks to your head* grow, my pretty, grow!
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:iconkmbrother:
kmbrother Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013  Student Writer
This is so depressing and moody. I love it!
Reply
:iconmuzica-chan:
Muzica-chan Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013
xDD Thanks :thumbsup: Depressing and moody can be fun too.
Reply
:iconkmbrother:
kmbrother Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013  Student Writer
In a way it can I suppose.
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:iconmuzica-chan:
Muzica-chan Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013
Well, more fun to write than read.
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