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Faerie Apologist
107 Watchers23.8K Page Views121 Deviations
Artist // Professional // Literature
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Super Albino: Llamas are awesome! (417)
My Bio
Poet. Author of the 5-star young adult fantasy trilogy FAYBORN. Book-worm ("hoards books in shelves & spare rooms; likes to sleep surrounded by them." Derivation, Old Tolkienic).

In spare time, chairs the folklore department at Lightfoot College.

Favourite Books
www.goodreads.com/mrwootton
Favourite Games
Minecraft, Catan
Favourite Gaming Platform
Tabletop
Tools of the Trade
Paint.net, GIMP, nearby cameras, graph paper, mechanical pencils
Other Interests
conservation ecology + backyard gardening, education, culture, cooking, et al.

Statistics

Page Views23.8K
Deviations121
Watchers107
Watching623
Favourites1.6K
Comments Made4.1K
Comments Received489

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417 Badges
Llama: Llamas are awesome! (1)
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Llama: Llamas are awesome!
Llama: Llamas are awesome!
Llama: Llamas are awesome!
Llama: Llamas are awesome!
Llama: Llamas are awesome!

Comments

:star::star::star::star: Overall
:star::star::star::star::star-half: Vision
:star::star::star::star-empty::star-empty: Originality
:star::star::star::star::star-empty: Technique
:star::star::star::star::star: Impact

"Amazing" is clearly the word of choice from viewers, and the reaction is well-deserved. Although it's not the first time this type of illustration has been done, in this case Kastelkreuz's dexterity with ink and choice of subject give the layout new meaning.

The scene - which is to say, the story - trails behind the horseman, almost like a thought bubble. The association is especially startling because the horseman is headless. It is as if the viewer is inside the horseman's head, so much so that the head has vanished altogether. It empowers the headless horseman, elevating him to the unexpected position of protagonist, making him the narrator of his own story.

An altogether wonderful portrayal of a classic motif.
Haunting
You're welcome!
:star::star::star-half::star-empty::star-empty: Overall
:star::star::star-half::star-empty::star-empty: Vision
:star::star::star-empty::star-empty::star-empty: Originality
:star::star::star::star-empty::star-empty: Technique
:star::star::star::star::star-empty: Impact

Man. This is a great concept, well-written lyric poetry, which I haven't seen much of on DA so far.

You have a couple lines that could use a another look, purely in terms of rhythm:

4 "One for hearts heavy and sad" - there is a natural pause missing right in the middle. Maybe "One for hearts made heavy and sad"?

7 "Endless tears" is a cliche. Find another word (and an extra syllable) instead of "endless". This is a realistic poem, no need to reach for hyperbolic images.

12 Love the repetition of "one more" in this line. Perfect.

14 Instead of "ultimate" consider using "final" - again, because "ultimate sacrifice" is a cliche (and also a debatable concept) and also because "ultimate" is one syllable too many here

17 This is a great line. It's ambiguous because a family born of blood could be relatives or could be brothers in battle, so it gives the reader a choice of which to salute (or to salute both).

21 Too many syllables, or maybe just too stilted because of the word "shall". It needs something, anyway.

24 "my family" is sonorously clumsy. Although the cant is technically right the line seems to get snarled here. "the family" or "a family" would be best but then you lose the emphasized personal connection (though it's still implied by the poem overall). You could say "our family" though it's still a bit long to say.

Overall, good work, a fitting tribute, definitely one for the pub back home.
MrWootton commented on Elana by TriZiana
Thank you!
Elana