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literature

To Dream of Falling

Daily Deviation
MoreaGaara's avatar
By MoreaGaara   |   Watch
336 212 11K (1 Today)
Published: May 14, 2010
I dream of falling.

It's not a dream common to angels.  After all, we have a pair of wings--or two or three--and we can use them.  We float upon the air, dance among the stars, shape the clouds with our breath, and so on.  All that lovely wordplay to describe an indescribable.  A joy, a graceless power.  Flight.

Humans dream of it often, I am told.  It makes sense.  They have no wings save for what they create with their hands.  Airplanes, hang gliders, helicopters.  Kites.  They are obsessed with the sky, more so than the angels themselves, many of whom will fly three thousand miles rather than walk across the street.

And yet I dream of falling.

And in my dreams, I always start out as what I am--a bookish secretary pushed into a role never intended for him--and I always end as a human.

And the first thing I feel is falling.

Sometimes I jump off the edge of one of the Heavens.  Sometimes I am flying when my wings lock and I plummet uncontrolled.  Sometimes I start diving for no reason and can't seem to pull out.  I prefer it when I jump; at least then I am choosing to fall.

During the fall, I feel my other four wings burn beneath my skin, burning me in symbols I would know if I could but see them.  During the fall--if I have jumped--I instinctively extend my wings to try and catch air, but I always fail, for there is no air.

And then I feel those begin to burn.  I feel each filament of each feather snap to flame, and then I feel the fire eat its way up to my wing-arms.  I feel the skin there sizzle, and I feel the blood begin to boil.  My muscles burst from the superheated fluid within them, and I continue to plummet.  I scream.

Only when naught but my bones are left does the fire extinguish itself.  But by then, I am consumed by the pain, and I am still falling, the soil of Enoch rushing up to greet me.  I smack into the ground hard, more than hard enough that if it were not a dream, I would become only a bloody smear, and then an ashy smear.

But somehow, in the dream, I live.  And I scream louder, scream from the pain of my lost wings, and for the pain from my shattered skeleton.  No one comes for me, for apparently no one has seen me fall.  I continue to scream until my voice gives out, and then I scream silently, weeping from the effort.  And when I can no longer hold my head up, I fall a second time, collapsing into the dust.

And then my eyes open to my own safe room, my wings whole, if not particularly healthy, and I am in no physical pain.  And then I resume my life, pretending that I slept well and am as rested as I could get given my numerous onerous duties.

And I tell no one, not even the healers, that I dream of falling.
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she strides like a sea walker, each step rippling outwards in search of a kindred being. this echolocation finds nothing- angry waves crash her delicate signals now as confused as her footsteps balanced upon the water's skin. she falters and begins to sink- a dangerous game to play Jesus and not know how to swim. soft hands slap against the cold hard surface as she flounders for a grasp on reality. her belief keeps her afloat for now. the water stings her face, evidence of struggle and suffering. her figure frames a distorted self portrait as she crawls back to her feet- on the other side of sane.
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Comments174
anonymous's avatar
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Rema-Alkhany's avatar
The torments of the soul that I read .. Thank you for this description successful.
shaymind's avatar
nice! not much more to say, i think.
Osterkaktus's avatar
OsterkaktusHobbyist Writer
God I love this
analillithbar's avatar
analillithbarHobbyist General Artist
:love:
MaryEvans's avatar
MaryEvansHobbyist Writer
Very nice! I love the emotional picture and mood as well as the vivid descriptions.
LadyofGaerdon's avatar
LadyofGaerdonProfessional Writer
Ooh wow - so intense! Congrats on a well-earned DD.
LadyofGaerdon's avatar
LadyofGaerdonProfessional Writer
Sure. :)
songbird264's avatar
songbird264Student Writer
wow i love this and i think your details really push your story past amazing
ItalianInNaziTrainin's avatar
I love this. It is sweet. It also sound like a familiar character from Haibane Renmei.
MoreaGaara's avatar
I have never read any of this person's work.
ItalianInNaziTrainin's avatar
I know. It has a different thing in the end. It is still good! I LUV IT!!!! <3
Birdkiller's avatar
BirdkillerProfessional Writer
Strange, I felt like I was floating through this piece rather than reading it. You are so direct, and I eny your ability.
MoreaGaara's avatar
I'm glad you liked it. :)
3qu1nox's avatar
3qu1noxHobbyist Traditional Artist
Glad you linked it, this is very very good. Unpleasant, intriguing, very good.
dragonwriter142's avatar
:wow: Definitely worthy of the Daily Deviation award! Wonderful storytelling and imagery!
anonymous's avatar
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