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I don't like that person. Actually...

I found out recently that I may truly despise that boy.
I'm rather jealous of him.

My stomach churns and twists whenever people applaud him.

I'm jealous of his eloquence and outgoing personality.

 I feel denounced every time he wins an award, wins a smile. He's almost better than me in each and every way. Sports, grades...life.


And yet, despite my trapped and bitter feelings,

I'm intrigued by him as a moth by the glowing lamplight.


Like a magnet, he pulls my attention closer and closer.

I can't help but admire him, respect him, laugh with him….My heart is pulled in two directions each time he laughs….each time he successfully jokes about something.

I am really jealous of him….Yet, at the same time, I'm awed by his appearance. He feels like an alien…

I think he lives in another world.
The people he interacts with are so different from mine…
The conversations he shares with others….the way he looks at his surroundings….


Because he is so different, I've always thought that I'm but an invisible being that he'll never recognize.

Thus, I'm always caught by surprise when he talks to me and calls me by my name.

"Why? Why would he talk to me?" I would wonder over and over again like a broken record without a guide….

I usually end up with the conclusion, "He had to. I was in the way."

My heart aches from thinking too much about him.
I'm really too jealous…. I would say to myself.

Yet, for some reason,
As much as I should hate him for his superiority,
My spirit lifts when he smiles,
My heart sinks when he cries.
I feel grateful every time he laughs and smiles at my joke….
I feel oddly ashamed when he feels otherwise.

When he's around,
My emotions become butterflies.
They flutter up and around,
Never settling down.

I tend to smile with contempt each time I find his mistakes….

Yet, I'm always the one avidly defending his known status of near perfection when others complain.

Because of him,
I look down on others.
My standard has been raised.
Thus, I can't help but feel like an insignificant beetle,
Whenever I think of him.

"WHAT NOW?! HE HAS A SORE THROAT TODAY!!"I would cheerfully say to myself…..
"Wow….He's still able to have such sophisticated conversations with everyone..." …is the very next thing that pops to my mind.  o_o


....
To me,
He is fire.
He sets my soul aflame and lay ruin to my puffed up pride.
He burns me with passion to continue after my goals….
Attracting everyone's attention, he warms up all individuals' thoughts….
He is my inspiration.

I'm jealous of this guy.

I'm seriously jealous of him.

He probably does not know,
But I secretly stalk him.
Out of the corner of my eyes,
I watch his every move.
With the little time I have,
I concentrate upon him.

No matter what I'm doing,
Be it drawing, gossiping, laughing…..

Somehow, I always manage to find myself searching for his silhouette.


Whenever I find him, I would secretly pray,
Hey look at me. Look at me. Look at me just once.

Did you know?

I'm really, awfully, hopelessly jealous of this boy.


:)
Thank you all for reading. I really appreciate it!
On a side note, I think I have a slight inferiority complex. Evidence= this piece of writing. o.o
***
Feel free to comment and fav!~ :bounce:
Oh, and feel free to help me increase the popularity of this piece on the net. (lol I would appreciate it greatly if you do xD)

****

(c) Me
Everything you see here comes purely from my brain and heart. I did not copy anyone. This is completely original :)

check out my other works here: :iconfeelingfreeplz:
[link] My Prince On White Unicorns

[link] Titanic

[link] The Heroes of Our Past
Add a Comment:
 
:iconalicejigsaw:
AliceJigsaw Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2019  Student Artist
Your text was suggested by DA, at the right of my own text. The title made me curious so I read. That was cool, interesting. I understood your feelings. Moreover, it's cool because it's like a contradiction, in your text: you admire him, but you're jealous. That's an interesting fing. It's like in philosophy, my teacher (not the best, to be honest Xp) said that when you hate something/someone, somewhere you're attracted by it. Personnally, I say to this: "It depends". I don't always agree with that way of thinking, but it can be true sometimes.
Reply
:iconyagamiseven:
Yagamiseven Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2013
this is really good, I love the tile
Reply
:iconshamrock-girl:
Shamrock-Girl Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012
is this your real feelings about someone!!
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
ok. fine. I admit it. Yes it is! TT^TT
Reply
:iconshamrock-girl:
Shamrock-Girl Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012
so you really like him.
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
O///O NO READ THE TITLE! Read the title properly!!!! And please don't tell anyone at our school! O_O
Reply
:iconshamrock-girl:
Shamrock-Girl Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012
you really, really like the guy. heheheheh
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
lol.....*whistle whistle*....proceeds to walk away innocently.
Reply
:iconshamrock-girl:
Shamrock-Girl Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012
sure. your not getting away. mwahahahaha
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
....Maybe... >///<
Reply
:iconshamrock-girl:
Shamrock-Girl Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012
wow.
Reply
:iconronmaicol:
ronmaicol Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
you have been featured in the Unknown Artists Club newsletter! [link]
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
wah. Thank you! This is an honor! :iconiloveitplz:
Reply
:iconla-nora:
La-Nora Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Love the writing! :D
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank chu~ :iconfeelingfreeplz:
Reply
:iconla-nora:
La-Nora Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
And thank you, too! :D
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
xD no problem~ <3
Reply
:iconla-nora:
La-Nora Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:D:D:D
Reply
:icontexelpride71314:
Texelpride71314 Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2012  Student Artist
Oh and also, try not to be so jealous of him. try to open ur heart and ur mind to him. maybe there's something u can find out about him and use it to ur adn=vantage. That is how the female mind works my friend^^
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
lol xD
Reply
:icontexelpride71314:
Texelpride71314 Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2012  Student Artist
That's how I use to feel about this boy in my peer counseling class. I use to feel that same way, but then I got to know him a little bit and blush whenever we talk. I have a small crush on him, but try to keep it out of my head. I totally understand your feelings^^ It would be funny if that boy saw this and commented lol^^
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
OMG. I really hope that doesn't happen. I would be embarrassed to death lol.
Reply
:icontexelpride71314:
Texelpride71314 Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2012  Student Artist
lol^^ he wouldn't know...... would he?
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Sadly. I'm afraid my description of the person points to only two or three possible boys at my school...haha. xD
Reply
:iconcatfrogmustache:
catfrogmustache Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2012
I really like this piece, it's really interesting and has some great lines, but I think you could do better on the organization. It almost doesn't seem like there is any. I think it would be easier and more pleasant to read is it had more of a structure, instead of jumping all over the place. But it conveys emotion well, and it's very relatable and fun.
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Good point. How do you think I can improve the structure? I really want to improve my piece somehow :)

((lol I actually didn't really use any structure. I just wrote whatever was on my mind/however I was feeling on the spur of the moment))
Reply
:iconcatfrogmustache:
catfrogmustache Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2012
Yeah, I usually just spit my brain out onto paper when I'm writing something like this, it's not unusual. :/
You might want to make it a little more like a poem and separate everything into stanzas, starting out with lines about how much you hate/envy this boy, then transition to your lines about your contrasting feelings for him, and then ending it again with how jealous/spiteful you are. And just have fun with it, play around with metaphors and similes, experiment with the length of lines, which ones you want long and which ones you want short. Mess with it until it feels right.
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Alright. i shall do exactly that on my next lit piece *eyes of ambitions* xD
Reply
:iconcatfrogmustache:
catfrogmustache Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2012
If you could see me through the interwebs you would be seeing me giving you the thumbs up.
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:D
Reply
:iconbunbunzzz:
bunbunzzz Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Same thing with my crush UvU
I've admitted my feelings to him (and he doesn't like me the way I like him), before he used to make a fun of me all the time and was a douche to me but now he talks with me and calls me by my nickname, also sometimes takes a look at me =w= (hehe this morning he said "hi" to me before I said "hi" to him x33 )
I watch his every move, every time he takes a look at me and smiles for some reason, I listen to every his word... =u= damnimmastalkerlol :'D
Reply
:iconrdeanl:
rDeanL Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
close to being in this situation. gotta. get. out.
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
lol... xD
Reply
:iconrdeanl:
rDeanL Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
k im out. cuz my feelings have become stronger for another guy. it was just admiration
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
oh i see. I misunderstood your phrase before.oops.
Well, good luck to you. :)
Reply
:iconrdeanl:
rDeanL Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
haha!! cheers to that!!
Reply
:iconataraxious:
Ataraxious Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Awwe.~ I remember when I met a guy like that, he always talked to me, even though others were avoiding me :heart: Its a shame he didn't like me that way~
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
aww... :(
Reply
:iconataraxious:
Ataraxious Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:iconcryforeverplz:
Reply
:iconkyoko43:
kyoko43 Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
cute- sounds like a manga i know.......
Reply
:icontaomega20:
taoMega20 Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
sounds more like love than jelousy, but still, nice work
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I'm a bit embarrassed to admit it but... I can see what you mean. ^///^
Reply
:icontaomega20:
taoMega20 Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
i have a way with knowing peoples feelings, if only they would feel them themselves, the world would be happier
Reply
:iconkochmann799:
kochmann799 Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
awwww
Reply
:icontheresalilly4231:
theresalilly4231 Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Student Writer
I know two people who this fits so perfectly with O____o Congrats, I must now send this to friends.
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Haha! Thanks for spreading my work! Tell me what they feel about this if you don't mind! :D
Reply
:icontheresalilly4231:
theresalilly4231 Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Student Writer
She liked it :-)
Reply
:iconmoonmystery:
moonmystery Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
awesome! :D
Reply
:iconchristineanne25:
ChristineAnne25 Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
He tried to tear my best friend and I apart.

Why is he so easy to crush on?

Omigod, I think I need something to get him off my mind.

AGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Beauiful poem, by the way.
Reply
:iconpredqueen:
PredQueen Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012
This is a beautiful piece. And I think we all have that one guy where we just like "Stop being so easy to crush on!" XD
Reply
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Submitted on
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