One week of intense training, done and done.
It is currently 3:21 am pacific time because I can never sleep when anticipating something. Let alone sleep regularly. Tommorow's flight is going to be hell.
I'm looking forward to getting back to my apartment in Chicago and pulling some all night renders. The sooner I get this movie out the door the better, cause although I worked very hard on it. There could've/should've been more. All that you'll see in my sure to be pages long synopsis.
About that? Heh, I wonder. I tolerate hate on a daily basis, but it's probably not the hate you're thinking of. There's a form of indirect hate that bothers me a great deal that everyone's aware of, but god knows why everyone ignores. Perhaps its just easier to live that way, I really don't know.
To sum it up, it's something I really noticed about 7 years ago. I started playing DDR, and then shortly after that, I started playing Pump it Up. Talk of the town among the would be dancers the would be which one I preferred. "Do you like Pump more, or do you like DDR more." Me all the while not really understanding why at all I had to make a choice. "Why do I have to pick sides?" I would ask back. What is it about people that they need to identify themselves about who they are by what they like? And not stopping there, why do people who so decidedly like to state what it is they like by making fun of it's supposed opposite?
The reason I bring this up is because I have been fighting this battle for years now. There have been a number of different people I've encountered, many of those who've built of some level of conviction towards something. And I always have to play the other side of the argument. Not because I am really on the other side, just because it's not fair. These days an argument that's made without the other side present, or these days on the internet, is made in a disgustingly mocking manner. Little buzz words or terminology is made up to support an argument. In essence, this stems from dealing in a generation that empowers themselves with words, those who are good at humor rule these fights with their humor. Because we all know if it's funny it must be true. These days the most prominent argument that irks me is the need to pick a side in this "Console War."
Some of these off the top of my head, most of which with less base than wit:
"The Pads on Pump it Up are like upside down cafeteria trays"
"PSP is a brick"
"It took 500 million dollars to make Spiderman 3, I should've gone into that movie and been handed a brick of gold" (People have no fucking clue how much money CG costs)
"Playstation 3 is a refrigerator"
"I don't care about graphics I just wanna have fun" <--(Saying this is a gigantic "FUCK YOU" to every game designer for the past 20 years who've struggled with hardware in order to deliver you an experience. If you think graphics peaked at gameplay in the last Generation then you're dead wrong. Graphics isn't just polygons and shaders. Things that make it easier for developers to give you games come with upgrading systems. Building games has to be one of the most difficult things in the world. Not only to you have to build a functioning world. But you have to innovate it every 5 years or people will complain your not being original enough."
"Tekken is a dial a combo game"
"Virtua Fighter's Movments suck"
"I Hate Sony"
"I Hate Microsoft"
"I Hate Nintendo"
I'm lost on the rest for now, but this has been happening waay too often. Hate is such a strong word. Know that identity isn't what you like, it's who you are. Listening to someone else's thoughts about what you should like make you no more unique than they are. In the 70's Bruce Lee told people that they need to be unique. Almost everyone took the message as "be unique like me" rather than "be unique."
Be true to your thoughts, and don't be afraid to not have any. The sweetest and most honest people in the world don't have a reaction when asked "what is it you hate?"
I've known a lot of artists, both online and off. But a rant like above doesn't come unless someone still somehow feels... alone. Something I've come to terms with a long time ago is the fact that I'll likely feel alone for the rest of my life. Quenching that though doesn't feel quite as important as what it is I need to do. So as far as art goes, I find myself wondering why is it that although I consider myself an artist. I don't feel amongst anyone despite that many types of artist I've been among? That's a tough one. But the one important thing I mentioned above is that, life isn't about what you want as much as it is about what you need to do. I might perhaps never feel the repercussions of my efforts. But it's not about the grattitude as it is about effecting people. This might sounds silly, but one of my greatest inspirations comes from characters like Ichigo, Naruto and Ippo. Guys who never give up, give it their all and always do whats right. Depsite it being the main staple character in animes, I don't think there are enough people like that in the real world. It was watching those animes that had a pretty profound effect on me. I have a feeling that a character like that exists to inpire characters like me. Someday my movies will inspire people and hopefully effect someone.
Wow that was longer than I expected. Curse you blog! Well here's a little something for having to sit through all that ranting. The people who've sought me out are of a calibur above. I never worry that I'm letting too much out because the world is large, and word does not travel as fast as we thought. At least if it's not in video form.
So here it is in animated GIF form!