Mistress-Inu's avatar
Persistence is her weapon.
49 Watchers22.7K Page Views267 Deviations
S
Something Better.
 When I was little, I wanted to be big. I wanted to be... everything. I wanted to be a ninja, famous for mastering martial arts within a matter of days. I wanted to be an astronaut so that I could reach out of my spaceship and touch a little star. I wanted to drink the secrets of life from the Big Dipper. I wanted to be a cowgirl and chase off that one kid—William, or something, wasn't it? I wanted to be able to talk to the horses. I wanted to be a wizard (before Harry Potter ever did) and be best friends with Merlin. If I couldn't be the wizard, I wanted to be a knight, even though only boys become knights. I wanted to be a firefi
16
3
U
Under A Strain.
My bones keep cracking. Why won't you help me out? Unbelievable...
7
0
I
Icicle.
You may be naïve enough to believe that these hostile words are for you: They are.
11
2
I
I am Coming.
Whenever I don't know what to write about, I wait for it to start raining and I write little messages in the fog on my windows. One gray, misty morning, I awoke and went downstairs to find a message already inscribed into the glass of the window that was embedded within the front door. Let's play. I'm waiting.
11
3
w
where the moon cries.
With your eyes, too, the autumn leaves promised me a happy life with you. Was this to be so, or was I deceived by the chill of a new winter? Am I to be yours, or to be trapped within the claws of a monster?
3
0
B
Boys with Duct Tape.
There are certain things you should not say at all; some, you should be saying.
14
4
v
v. sixteen months
Before you came to bed at three o' clock in the morning, I left another note on your pillow. It's the 29th of our second December. All I want for our sixteenth month is you. Trust me. I love you.
7
1
i
iiii. love bites
I ended up not writing that letter because it made me cry once I had written it all out, so I ended up not leaving it on your pillow before I ended up not sleeping in the bathtub so that you wouldn't have to share a bed with a pitiful child that still throws her shoes in the corner when she gets pissed. Instead, I crumpled the paper up into a ball, and I burned it the way you burned your belt the night before, but instead of throwing pretty dust on it to smother it, I let it burn and burn and burn and burn and burn, until it was nothing but ash on the carpet. Then I started crying because I felt alone and because you were so fucking stubborn
10
2
i
iii. problematic
The next night, you refused to talk to me again, and you wouldn't even tell me why, but I figured from the rainclouds in your eyes that you were sad again and just didn't want to be bothered, like what usually happens with you anymore. So I went upstairs to your room, and I picked up these pages from where I had set them on your desk, looked through the words I had written so far, and I decided that those words and every word that came after them were going to be about you. They were going to be about you and me, in my own metaphorical, parallel universe-sort of way. These words, love, are about you and me, written by my own subconscious, bi
5
0
i
ii. animals
Two days later, you pulled us away from the eyes of the sunset and purred in my ear, "Let's make up." You ripped your belt out from its loops and set flame to it and threw it off the bed as though rejecting the bite of a snake, and you held me in your arms so that my spine was aligned with the warm center of your chest, and we watched the fire devour the leather you normally would have used to whip me on the ass in order to make me call you "Master" and you whispered against my neck that you wouldn't hurt me with it this time and I sighed in relief because I believed you, and it felt so good to believe you, and I leaned back into you and I sa
7
2
See all
S
Something Better.
 When I was little, I wanted to be big. I wanted to be... everything. I wanted to be a ninja, famous for mastering martial arts within a matter of days. I wanted to be an astronaut so that I could reach out of my spaceship and touch a little star. I wanted to drink the secrets of life from the Big Dipper. I wanted to be a cowgirl and chase off that one kid—William, or something, wasn't it? I wanted to be able to talk to the horses. I wanted to be a wizard (before Harry Potter ever did) and be best friends with Merlin. If I couldn't be the wizard, I wanted to be a knight, even though only boys become knights. I wanted to be a firefi
16
3
U
Under A Strain.
My bones keep cracking. Why won't you help me out? Unbelievable...
7
0
I
Icicle.
You may be naïve enough to believe that these hostile words are for you: They are.
11
2
I
I am Coming.
Whenever I don't know what to write about, I wait for it to start raining and I write little messages in the fog on my windows. One gray, misty morning, I awoke and went downstairs to find a message already inscribed into the glass of the window that was embedded within the front door. Let's play. I'm waiting.
11
3
w
where the moon cries.
With your eyes, too, the autumn leaves promised me a happy life with you. Was this to be so, or was I deceived by the chill of a new winter? Am I to be yours, or to be trapped within the claws of a monster?
3
0
B
Boys with Duct Tape.
There are certain things you should not say at all; some, you should be saying.
14
4
v
v. sixteen months
Before you came to bed at three o' clock in the morning, I left another note on your pillow. It's the 29th of our second December. All I want for our sixteenth month is you. Trust me. I love you.
7
1
i
iiii. love bites
I ended up not writing that letter because it made me cry once I had written it all out, so I ended up not leaving it on your pillow before I ended up not sleeping in the bathtub so that you wouldn't have to share a bed with a pitiful child that still throws her shoes in the corner when she gets pissed. Instead, I crumpled the paper up into a ball, and I burned it the way you burned your belt the night before, but instead of throwing pretty dust on it to smother it, I let it burn and burn and burn and burn and burn, until it was nothing but ash on the carpet. Then I started crying because I felt alone and because you were so fucking stubborn
10
2
i
iii. problematic
The next night, you refused to talk to me again, and you wouldn't even tell me why, but I figured from the rainclouds in your eyes that you were sad again and just didn't want to be bothered, like what usually happens with you anymore. So I went upstairs to your room, and I picked up these pages from where I had set them on your desk, looked through the words I had written so far, and I decided that those words and every word that came after them were going to be about you. They were going to be about you and me, in my own metaphorical, parallel universe-sort of way. These words, love, are about you and me, written by my own subconscious, bi
5
0
i
ii. animals
Two days later, you pulled us away from the eyes of the sunset and purred in my ear, "Let's make up." You ripped your belt out from its loops and set flame to it and threw it off the bed as though rejecting the bite of a snake, and you held me in your arms so that my spine was aligned with the warm center of your chest, and we watched the fire devour the leather you normally would have used to whip me on the ass in order to make me call you "Master" and you whispered against my neck that you wouldn't hurt me with it this time and I sighed in relief because I believed you, and it felt so good to believe you, and I leaned back into you and I sa
7
2
hugs anyone
75
101
Someday
14
10
Not The Brightest ...
176
1.7K
while my guitar gently weeps.
4
6
promises.
16
5
get well soon
17
240
Yin and Yang
14
23
Love, Peace and Donuts
40
113
United States
Deviant for 11 years
Badges
Llama: Llamas are awesome! (4)
Facedesk
Oh yeah, I forgot to mention: I'm on Facebook now. If you've got one, look up Shelbs Mrgn to find me and drop me a message.
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MSN
So, for all you guys that didn't know I made a new account months back and are still following me here, I made another MSN. I use AIM too, still, but also MSN. shelbyflannel@hotmail.com
1
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So, It's Come to This.
I'm officially going on a sort of hiatus now, I suppose. I'd rather not, but I'm much too tired, busy, uninspired, and severely much too stressed to deal with deviantART right now, mmk? I don't want to go on a hiatus, believe me. But under the current circumstances of my life, I don't really have a choice by now. I've more important things to focus on, as well, and they need tending to. I need to get my life back together. You guys can find me here http://www.littlepenchan.blogspot.com/ if you want to keep up, if you don't already know that. I update there whenever I can, but only when something actually happens in this godforsaken nowher
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bytail's avatar
bytail| Digital Artist
*noms on*
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MayhemManicX's avatar
The King of Pop just died ! it made me think of you! dont ask why :\ i just miss you!!!! :la:
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xXTheHatterXx's avatar
Miss you mistress mine
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Cookieka's avatar
Miss you Rei. ):
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Policide's avatar
Policide|Hobbyist General Artist
I mees you. :c
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MayhemManicX's avatar
wait i should have read the journal first ...allright hun , i hope you doo come back in this lifetime , please note me as soon as you return!
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MayhemManicX's avatar
long time no talky , you allright , whats new ?
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