Roast Ox Flavoured Crisps

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Mikenestin's avatar
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I recently made the mistake of buying a turquoise teapot. The fact that it is turquoise is not a problem; I happen to like turquoise and the interesting pseudo-japonisme floral pattern in pink also failed to make me uncomfortable in my masculinity. The problem with said teapot, is that it is a teapot.
Teapots, if you hadn't inferred from the name, are essentially pots that hold tea (an ingenious infusion of weeds and hot water) in large quantities. And this is where the problem arises. Whereas previously I would have to suffice with only one cup, and have to battle laziness and apathy (I fight I never win, but have to get panic and deadline to come and tag-team them) and fetch a second. I now have access to my own personal teapot, which sits, gently simmering, on my desk. With the handy additions of a bone-china cup (plus saucer!), milk-jug, sugar-pot and spoon, I now find myself easily consuming five or six cups within the hour.
Needless to say, the continuous caffeine-high has forced me onto a new plain of existence. Nirvana via Earl Grey.

Back to Roast Ox. On my frequent travels downstairs (which are arduous but often necessary, else I starve to death) I find myself regarding the larder with the bemused squint of those who have to focus very, very hard to actually detect things in the empirical world. Upon opening aforementioned cupboard I find a packet of crisps (having previously disallowed myself from eating both raw jam and flour), and march off back up the stairs - crisps clasped in my caffeine-enfeebled claws.

Upon arriving in my room, and flopping elegantly into my swivel-chair (with elegantly threw me off; swivel chairs having no time for flopping) I examined the packet. Written in bold white on navy-blue where the words 'Real Crisps' and under that 'handcooked' and further under that, the words: 'Roast Ox Flavour.'

What? WHAT? My brain rallied against my eyes for a moment and all I could see was little orange stars. Ox!?

Hungry and exhausted, I gave in and ate the damn things.

They where quite nice.



In other news, :iconizzymedrano: has painted a rather dashing (yet surprisingly green) characiture of yours truely. A must see, obviously. www.deviantart.com/deviation/5…
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Laroche's avatar
I found myself reading this journal yet again after a long while and one thing struck me. If you get a high from tea, then what happens if you drink coffie? I did not drink coffie before entering the intressting world of the University. To keep myself sane and awake on my historylessons I drank coffie by the gallons. Even then I fell asleep infront (!) of my teacher. Talk about humiliating. Before this missuse of coffie I was a tea drinker. I drank black tea with milk, no sugar. Now I drink, red, green, chinese, japanese and strange other teas from all over the world. Still the best tea I ever had was on portobello road in London. It was earl grey with cream and sugar with buns that had clotted cream on them. And I also had a bonechina cup with plate. I can not spell the word you used so I wont. XD Anyway How do you react to coffie my friend? Also forgive me for all and any spellingmistake in this comment of mine.
Foxfairy24's avatar
I've had those before. They're quite tasty. My packet was actually suitable for vegetarians.
Mikenestin's avatar
Hmm... [strokes beard] I guess barbecued tofu flavour can't be all that interesting...
Foxfairy24's avatar
tofu has no flavor. It would just be barbeque.
Mikenestin's avatar
... TASTES OF FIRE!
Foxfairy24's avatar
For that lovely burning flavour in your mouth, try Orbits new Barbeque Tofu Mint gum.
Mikenestin's avatar
Scorchingly fresh breath...
Foxfairy24's avatar
Like hot earth bubbling out of a volcano.
Mikenestin's avatar
Oh baby, you really know how to get me going. Rawr.
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Athenazero's avatar
Hahaha... Roast Ox? That sounds terrible. ^^

But you kept eating them so I assume they had at least a little bit of good flavor...
Mikenestin's avatar
Suprisingly delicious - however there was only one in the cupboard; I wonder if spirits had planted it there on the orders of snacks manufactuers to assess public reaction...?
Tiznaught's avatar
Wonder if I can find those in the states
Mikenestin's avatar
Have a look. Sounds like a bizzarely European thing, however.
Tiznaught's avatar
Yeah, funny that I can find all kinds of odd Asian grocery stores, but very few European ones around here.
Mikenestin's avatar
I guess it's kinda redundant as we eat the same food...
Tiznaught's avatar
Well, sort of. Canada probably has stuff like that.
Mikenestin's avatar
Except you don't get proper bread...
Tiznaught's avatar
mmyeah. I wish those delicious artisan breads cost less.
Mikenestin's avatar
Artisan breads?
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Laroche's avatar
Its nice to have teapots! I have three myself! ^^
Mikenestin's avatar
Have you ever used all the same time?
Laroche's avatar
No not really.
Gouch's avatar
you must be pissin' like a race horse lad.
Mikenestin's avatar
True. If only my penis size fit a similar metaphorical description...
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