literature

Painful Comfort

Deviation Actions

MickyBluEyes's avatar
By
Published:
11 Comments
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Literature Text

Heels of hands rammed against temples
Eyelids crushed against knees
Forever foetal in the hard corner
Two blank white walls, cold scuffed grey floor
Leer closer, always closer
Strain to hear
Through pressed lips

One, tiny
         Whisper
           Word
             Worry

Just one small
              Scream
                 Stutter
                   Sorrow

One
   Just one
      ‘Vocalisation’

“Be vocal, be free” demands the bent blue-coat
Swollen, blackened eyes roll up his body
Coldly mocking chiselled canines
Hungrily glare down, fuelled by florescence
‘They too are silent’
The tortured, ironic smile is answered
Swiftly with fast heels.

Dull thud. Muted snap.
Opportunity marches out the steel door
Rattling keys fade with receding footsteps

A cynically compassionate guard
“…silence worth pain…”
was the gist: cutting remark
lost on a bloodied smiling face
it sorta truned out how I wanted it...its a bit shorter then its original

after roaming around i decided to write something for *SmileEmptySoul0 's Silence contest
I was gunna draw the image in teh first stanza but hey i seriously suck at drawing
© 2004 - 2022 MickyBluEyes
Comments11
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mgfr103's avatar
wow thats reall cool.did you take pictures of collages with the pollaroid or did you cut and paste or photoshop or what?
MickyBluEyes's avatar
um used stock photos for the three largest polAroids, pluss all the small ones. all the images are pasted in stocks :D
digimonsterz's avatar
excellent concept
MickyBluEyes's avatar
littlemissangel's avatar
i love the pictures you conjour when i read one of ur poems. There sooo vivid and real i feel as if i could reach out and touch the people in them
MickyBluEyes's avatar
hey thanks.
i jus write what i see with my minds eye-i got an active imagination i gess :)
littlemissangel's avatar
No you don't *so brendon thing to say*
puremyth's avatar
The image in the first stanza did not need to be drawn, it comes across clear as a photograph. When I read the first couple of lines I misinterpreted it as violence, before realising what it literally meant, but the lingering taste of that made the scene more powerful.

Love the intensity and strain of the fractured middle stanzas, and the use of sound imagery at towards the end is vivid and powerful.

Damn you're good at this stuff.
MickyBluEyes's avatar
i think ive got the attention span of a goldfich

-thanks for the fave as well :)

- and i was gunna draw the first stanza for the competition, but i realised i could describe the scene better with words
MickyBluEyes's avatar
hey thanks for such a cool comment. :salute: :D

yea the i wrote the first stanza as i saw it in my head. i read it again and see that it is quite violent :o

yea i try my best at writing :)
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