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Mehetabel's Profile Picture
Mehetabel
is mystery
Artist | Student | Digital Art
Japan
Always Learning so always a student. I'd love it if I could afford fancy college fees...

Born in Edmonton, Alberta and live in Japan. I draw for the love of art and story. I roleplay for fun and am no where near good but do it anyway. I am Metis and proud of it! I've been living in Japan 6 years with my loving husband so my art will have a unique mix just like I am.
It's unusual I do a journal but I believe I owe you my faithful very small following some explanation for my absence.
I'm not one usually to share my personal life too much on social media unless it's to help out one of you. However my personal life has impeded greatly on my work here on DA.
Thus I think it warrants some explanation.

I've never been very healthy physically, emotionally or mentally. Since childhood I had a rather melancholy nature and weak in body.

I have struggled and tried to be optimistic and keep my commitments as best as I can manage. However the strain of two jobs and some personal issues has taken it's toll.
My arthritis in my right hand has been a painful hindrance but there have been other things happening in the background for some time.
I have lost 3 friends this last year which draws my attention greatly to mental health awareness, keenly my own. Every time I draw I am faced with the demons of never being good enough, an amateur and a failure. Every time I think of drawing I can only think how nothing comes out as I imagined it and I'm a subpar impostor trying to be something I'm not. I feel keenly that I'm worthless, fake, a disappointment, a drama queen, a bore and that I've never really impacted anyone's life. I even get those thoughts that tell me disappearing would help others move on with their life so they don't have to worry about me anymore and my failings in various areas. Sometimes I want to just stop the pain, I deal with a neurological and spinal damage that impedes my movement and causes me pain.

In short, every day I get up out of bed in under an hour is a triumph. Every piece of artwork is a testament to concentration and my love of what I do over the quality of what I do.

I really do believe as an artist, I'm subpar at best. I never had the schooling these young people had its almost all self taught.
I don't want to disappoint anyone and I don't mean to keep you waiting. I have so many lovely images I want to draw but I'm truly my own worst enemy.
I imagine other artists feel this way.
So while I'm being honest that right now I am not in a good place and right now I'm really unsure of my future (there may be some changes to clarify) I want to encourage you all that it does get better and you need to focus on those small victories. Take it a day at a time and be patient with yourself. Tell yourself that its the sickness and not you and like all sicknesses you can get better.

A step at a time. Like arthritis nodes you won't get better in a day.
I'm sorry if you weren't interested too terribly in my life. I don't do this often I swear.
I am getting better slowly and I really do have a lot of unfinished projects I'd love to art dump once I don't feel so...unsteady.
I do love you all and the work I do. Till the next update.
  • Listening to: Music for Writing I The Phantom Music
  • Reading: Iron Kissed by Patricia Briggs
  • Watching: A Centaur's Life
  • Playing: Zelda BotW
  • Eating: Nothing
  • Drinking: cocoa

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:iconnorthernmyth:
NorthernMyth Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2017  Student Digital Artist
Thanks for the :+fav: :heart:!
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:iconjwiesner:
JWiesner Featured By Owner Oct 1, 2017  Professional
Hey, thanks for the fav on my centaur girl! :heart:
Lying centaur girl by JWiesner

You have beautiful art, by the way! c:
Reply
:iconhatsumei-akari:
Hatsumei-Akari Featured By Owner Jun 7, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you for the fav on Asma's gala dress <3
Reply
:iconlouvan:
Louvan Featured By Owner May 17, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you very much for the favourite  :hug:
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:iconmehetabel:
Mehetabel Featured By Owner May 17, 2017  Student Digital Artist
I'll always favourite you ;)
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:iconshethetde:
SheTheTDE Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
Hey I like your style
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:iconmehetabel:
Mehetabel Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2017  Student Digital Artist
Well thank you! That's really nice of you!
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:iconshethetde:
SheTheTDE Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
OMG your art is actualy really good. I made that first comment after just a glance and I thought you were tracing photos cause it sort of resembles that old traced photographs comic style but you said in your descriptions that you don't and I'll trust you on that. But I like how it looks a lot it's as photorealistic as a cell shaded picture can get.
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:iconmehetabel:
Mehetabel Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2017  Student Digital Artist
I do use a lot of photograph references and I link my references when I do. I also do some tracing and I make a note of it when it is traced and link it back to the stock photo. For the most part I really try to give all my inspirations and references their due credit. I've been really focusing on anatomy and poses recently and not do as much tracing. I can see what you mean though since that is where I started. I did just purchase sai so hopefully I'll be able to branch out more from the old cell shade comic style and less referenced and traced work. It's a process but if you'd like more than happy to post the sketches some time so you can see how the picture on paper starts out.
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(1 Reply)
:iconagentk19:
AgentK19 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2017  Professional Digital Artist
Thank you  for the fav!
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