The Suspicious Servant

Sanura Shani and the Suspicious Servant

The blistering sands of ancient Egypt. A time of warriors, magicians, pharaohs...and gods. A kingdom, nestled snugly in the heart of the Egyptian desert, flourished. This kingdom was called Scarab Spitz, and it was relatively small. However, it did have a guardian. A powerful being watched over them...when she wasn’t asleep, that is. An advisor to this guardian entered the temple in the heart of the kingdom, only to be greeted by loud snoring. This was how just about every day started for him. He ventured into the darkness, calling out, “Great goddess Sanura Shani, arise and hear the call of your people!”

The next sounds he heard were a few sleepy snorts, as whatever being the advisor addressed slowly awoke. A voice called back to him, “Ugh, Imhotep, it’s so early... Can’t I sleep just a little more?”

Imhotep shouted, “Most certainly not, you lazy cat. Now get up and do your job!” A bright light shone in the immense chamber, and revealed a massive feline creature, built like a sphinx, but all cat. Her fur was blue, and she possessed medium-length, purple hair. The cat sported quite luxurious jewelry, and she flaunted her authority whenever she chose. Her wings were small; they probably wouldn’t carry Sanura for very long. The bright light obviously agitated the creature, and she covered her eyes instinctively. “YOW! Agh, Imhotep, why do you DO that?!”

Her advisor replied sharply, “How else am I to wake you up? You heard me, Sanura; get up.” Sanura begrudgingly complied, slowly crawling to her feet and rubbing her eyes. “Way too early...” she mumbled, slowly walking toward her bath chamber while Imhotep followed.

Sanura’s bath chamber consisted of a very large pool (it had to be large to accommodate Sanura’s body), which was already filled with pleasantly warm water. Slowly the goddess eased herself in and smiled softly. “Ahhh, that’s it, that feels great...” Imhotep stood nearby, sighing to himself. He was supposed to be helping the sphinx to become worthy of full godhood, but instead he felt like he was reduced to babysitting her.

Sanura’s stomach gurgled very loudly as she bathed, and Imhotep groaned. He knew this could only mean one thing... His suspicions were confirmed when a large number of bubbles erupted to the surface around Sanura, who just grinned and sighed in relief. At least since her rump was underwater, Imhotep thought, the smell wouldn’t be nearly as bad. Still, he growled, “Sanura, that is a disgusting habit! It is not becoming of a goddess to display such crass manners... Plus, you’ll kill off everything if you keep doing that!”

Sanura just laughed. “Aw, Imhotep, you’re such a nag! I gotta rip ‘em a lot, especially with all you’ve been feeding me!” She saw no problem with her behavior, though Imhotep certainly did. Still, at her size, Sanura’s “emissions” were quite potent. Her flatulence, as well as her enthusiasm for “ripping them”, as she put it, had gotten her into trouble more than once. Still, trying to force her to stop behaving in such a way was like trying to stop the tide—impossible.

After Sanura had had a satisfying bath, she dried off and said, “So, what’s on the agenda today? Bless this, fix that, what?” Imhotep, gazing at a scroll, replied in surprise, “Actually, it doesn’t look like there’s anything that you need to do today.” Sanura was torn between two governing emotions. On the one hand, she wanted to do something to Imhotep for waking her up early, but on the other, she was ecstatic that she had the whole day off. The latter won out, and she practically jumped into the air with glee. “YIPPEEEEEEEE! You mean I’ve got the whole day off? Awesome! Nothing but me time!”

Imhotep sighed and growled, “Just try not to get into any trouble, okay? We don’t need any sort of crisis just because you don’t have anything to do today. And above all, try to keep...THAT...under control!” He rolled up the scroll and placed it nearby. The sphinx chuckled and said, “Pshaw! You worry too much! Now, go on! Scoot! Time for my day of pampering to begin!” Imhotep walked out of the temple, mumbling in disgust to himself.

However, before Sanura even had time to get herself comfy, a man entered the temple. His hair was dark blue, and he had sparkling green eyes; the man appeared to be in his early to mid-twenties. He was dressed in white cloth and golden jewelry, including two golden snake-bands on his arms. The goddess blinked; he didn’t look like any manservant she had seen before. The man walked forward and knelt before her. “Great goddess Sanura Shani,” he said, “I have been sent to tend to you for the day. Anything you desire, you have but to name.” This made Sanura grin; she leaned down to get a better look at this gentleman. “Anything, you say? Hmm, what’s your name?”

The man replied, “I am Nephrus, great goddess. It is an honor to be able to serve you.” Sanura giggled and said, “Well, then, Nephy, go out and get me some grub! I’m starving!” Nephrus nodded, smiling. “It would be my pleasure.” He then rushed from the temple, leaving Sanura to laze about on her mountain of cushions. About 40 minutes later, Nephrus returned. “Miss Sanura, the food you have requested awaits you at the altar.” Sanura laughed and shouted, “Now yer talking!” She happily exited the temple, trying her best to exert an air of superiority. In her mind, she succeeded.

It didn’t take too long for the goddess and her new servant to arrive at the altar, where, as Nephrus had promised, mountains of food were piled up. Sanura began drooling at the sight, getting slobber on Nephrus, who groaned slightly and brushed it off of him. Within moments, the sphinx lunged at the mountains of food, devouring the morsels messily and heartily. She even licked the altar clean to make sure she hadn’t missed anything, topping her fantastic meal off with a long, loud belch. “Ahh, that was so good... Man, why can’t I get treatment like this all the time?” She chuckled and slowly got to her feet, her belly now having attained a more significant paunch. She walked back to the temple slowly, while Nephrus followed. When they returned, the fat cat flopped down, smiling in pure bliss. “Man, Nephy, you sure do know how to charm a girl...” Nephrus chuckled and said, “It is my pleasure to serve you.”

Smirking, Sanura replied, “Oh? Well, in that case...” She pointed to her bloated belly with a claw and said, “How ‘bout a tummy rub?” Nephrus gladly obliged, walking over and kneading her stomach slowly, but not too firmly. This felt great for the sphinx, who “accidentally” ripped a few loud farts during the course of the belly rub. Nephrus coughed as his nose caught the foul stink, but he didn’t openly complain like Imhotep had. This satisfied Sanura even more, and pretty soon, it was a little after noon. The young man said to Sanura, “After a hearty meal like that, you must be getting thirsty... Would you care for anything to drink?” Sanura thought about this; she was thirsty indeed, but didn’t know how much more her tummy could take...

In the end, she nodded and ordered Nephrus to bring her juice, and lots of it. A massive pot was close by, and after about twenty minutes, it was full of juice. Nephrus then pulled out a flask and poured a strange, greenish liquid into the juice; curious, Sanura decided to take a peek. “Whatcha doing?” she asked, which startled Nephrus a little. “Oh, just adding a little something to make it taste better.” This satisfied Sanura, who smiled. “Ah; in that case, juice me!” She reached for the pot and practically chugged its contents. Another temple-shaking belch later, Sanura had grown even chubbier, but only by a bit. “All right, now, Nephy, you’ve done very good. Now, I order you to let me take a little cat nap; I’ll call for ya when I wake up.” She grinned and slowly drifted off to sleep, emitting a few bursts of flatulence while asleep. She was rudely awoken an hour or so later, but by her own stomach. “Urgh, I don’t feel so good... Whew, I haven’t felt this yucky since I ate those sick cows... Urp! I think I might be...” With that, she uttered a monstrous fart, even more powerful than any she had loosed that day. She winced in pain and hollered, “Nephrus! Get in here!” Nephrus ran in, with a look of concern on his face. “You called?”

The sphinx nodded and groaned. “Yeah... *urp!* I feel really weird... Maybe it was something I ate...” Nephrus nodded. “I hope you didn’t overdo it, Miss...”

With that, Imhotep walked into the chamber. He shouted, “Hey! Who are you, and what are you doing in here?” Nephrus turned and said, in a mellifluous voice, “Hello, sir. I am Nephrus, a recently appointed servant. Sanura isn’t feeling so good, so I just came in to check up on her.”

Imhotep growled, “I don’t think you staying here is a good idea. I am Sanura’s advisor, and I would ‘advise’ that you leave as soon as possible.” Sanura scoffed, then grunted a little. Pushing out another super-fart, she moaned, clutching her belly with her paws. “Oog, maybe I did overdo it a little... But it was all so good...*hic* Aw, man, I think I’m gonna be sick...” As if to accentuate that last statement, she covered her mouth with one paw, groaning again.

“ACK!” Imhotep cried, coughing and fanning the air. “Ugh, Sanura, do you HAVE to do that? It’s worse than before!” Sanura groaned and said, “That’s the point! I haven’t had gas this bad since that big feast two weeks ago...” She chuckled as she reminisced about that feast, until her aching stomach brought her around once more.

Nephrus said, “Well, I don’t want to be a third wheel; I’ll see you guys later.” With that, he left the temple, leaving Sanura and her advisor alone. “Sanura,” Imhotep said, “what all DID you eat?” The sphinx answered, “Just the usual at the altar earlier today, plus a pot of juice before my nap. It was fresh, though, but Nephy added a little something to make it taste better.” She giggled and added, “And it worked too! He must have been in a hurry; he left the bottle of it over there.” She motioned with her tail, and Imhotep hurried over to pick up the flask that Nephrus had left. He observed whatever liquid was left in it, and after a few minutes of observation, his face paled.

“Sanura,” he said, hands trembling, “this isn’t an additive...

“It’s...poison.”