Shop Forum More Submit  Join Login


The morning of the red sun
An angel held my hand
His slightly rustling wings
Were a string orchestra’s violins
Pure gold in the new born light
And the bitter tears I never shed
Those wings of whispered dreams
Touched my ocean eyes
Suddenly I could clearly see
My reflection in the sky
Was a thousand unseen stars

“You will never have wings”
My angel softly spoke
“But you’ll fly beyond the light”
It must have been the truth
Whether or not it really was
Because he believed it
Hand in hand I walked
Through dreams and fairytales
Hopes and little white lies
I loved for the first time
Because he couldn’t die

“You must never forget”
I knew it was important
Though I would not remember
He was convinced I had to
On unspoken words and wishes
He carried me to yester dreams
Not ever to come true
His colours painted me
With butterflies on white lilies
Swaying in a winter breeze
My unbreakable pain shattered
On the drops of a pearl haze

“Close your eyes to see”
This is my only memory
Even if it never happened
For I trust he still remembers
His wings were of liquid silver
Under the bright blue moon
Of the night I knew would bring
Another red sun in the morning
But I would never see it
Because at the break of dawn
He welcomed me with a kiss
To Eternity Without Wings
This one is very personal... :happycry:

Somehow It Never Rains Forever brought it all back
So ~Pentagram-Keeper thank you for letting me use your beautiful piece as a preview
Be sure to view it in it's full glory!

Editing:
~TacitPoet
Marcel, you're the best :smooch:
Add a Comment:
 
:iconditzibum:
ditzibum Featured By Owner Aug 30, 2006
tis is sweet! i like it!! =D
Reply
:iconcatchmeintherain:
CatchMeInTheRain Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2005   Photographer
really really good. i love how you brought it all together with your last two lines.
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2005
I'm glad you liked it
Reply
:iconniki-m:
niki-m Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2004   Writer
did u got to poetry school, cuz this i soo good. u really have talent for poetry!
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2004
thank you so much :hug: it's just a little something I like to do every now and then
Reply
:iconniki-m:
niki-m Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2004   Writer
well ur work is very good.
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2004
:blushes: thank you...
Reply
:iconniki-m:
niki-m Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2004   Writer
^__^
Reply
:iconbubble-gum:
BubBLe-GuM Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2004
wow, its soo booootiful. felt like i was there. wow.
xx
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2004
:) ty so much
Reply
:iconbubble-gum:
BubBLe-GuM Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2004
:hug:
Reply
:iconsherazai:
Sherazai Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2004  Professional General Artist
Tis sad yet lovely in its depth. It reminds me of being surrrounded in darkness....without hope, lost in eternity with the sole desire of loving someone but only to have my heart taken with broken dreams and broken promises. Once I wondered where was hope...this poem reminds me that I have hope in my hands...within my reach...as fragile it may seem but it is something to cherish and hold on to even more once its gone and found again. Seeing the young lady with so much depth and emotion in her while holding the precious rose in her hands, I can't help but get the feeling I can spend eternity without wings an eternity loving someone :blushes: Its beautiful in its pain and sadness as well as the beauty that comes with it.

----------

I don't like to give critique but I like to write more than one word on how I am moved by a poem. It is my way of appreciating art and express my love for Aesthetics, what I consider Beautiful. I'm blabbing as usual but I can not help to appreciate words so beautiful and full of artistry as yours. I am moved. I am moved by your eloquence. I am moved by your talent. I am moved by how you can accomplish so much in your poetry at such a young age. That...that you don't see every day. :aww: hence this is going into my favorites.
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2004
wow, this is such a wonderful comment. I'm really glad you liked it, because this one means so much to me. thank you
Reply
:iconsherazai:
Sherazai Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2004  Professional General Artist
^^; np. you're welcome.
Reply
:icondovenwolf:
DovenWolf Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2004
wow, this gave me chills, very emotional and great imagery, very well written :clap:
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Nov 5, 2004
that's lovely to hear :hug:
Reply
:icondetangler:
Detangler Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2004
The poem is ... awesome!! I've got SO much to learn... And the image is beautifull! So well-chosen for the poem!

A fav.
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2004
:hug: that is sweet of you to say, I'm just an amature
Reply
:iconslitface:
sLiTfAcE Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2004  Hobbyist General Artist
freakin awesome...
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2004
thank you :)
Reply
:icondeconiv:
deconiv Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2004
I like the first two stanzas! Great imagery! =)
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2004
thank you
Reply
:iconemochick91:
emochick91 Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2004
kool pic...goes along with the poem! In the poem its so vivid in a way that you can see it! I love it!
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2004
:happycry: that's a lovely comment
Reply
:icondemonlight:
demonlight Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2004  Professional Writer
This is wonderful; there isn't much here I could pick apart. Very, very good.
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2004
that's nice to hear, thank you
Reply
:iconpoormanssuperman49:
PoorMansSuperman49 Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2004   Filmographer
wow this is beautiful...very good imagery
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2004
:hug: thank you
Reply
:iconpurgatorys-bay:
purgatorys-bay Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2004
I know for a fact that I commented on this. It was a rather lengthy comment too. I wonder if DA ate it.
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2004
hehe, it's there, don't worry... sometimes it just doesn't show for a while, it is there though
Reply
:iconpurgatorys-bay:
purgatorys-bay Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2004
Splendid!
Reply
:iconpurgatorys-bay:
purgatorys-bay Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2004
This is amazing. Not many works do I favorite, but I believe your writing to be that good. If a poem brings a person incapable of crying to the brink of tears, then it has more than done it's job. I would like to send my thanks to you for writing a truely outstanding piece. Well done. Maybe I will critique it to find fault (if fault exists) later, now I will let it sink in more.
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2004
:hug: that's one of the best comments I've ever received :smooch: you don't have to critique it though... not this one, I won't change it anymore... it's too personal, to me it's finished, no matter how imperfect it might be. Thank you for this wonderful comment
Reply
:iconmtlv:
MTLV Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2004  Hobbyist Writer
very nice ;) your good at giving visuals
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2004
:) thank you....
Reply
:iconagirlnamedluna:
agirlnamedluna Featured By Owner Oct 31, 2004
That´s really a lovely tale you pictured there :)
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Oct 31, 2004
that's sweet of you :hug:
Reply
:icondamephantasm:
damephantasm Featured By Owner Oct 3, 2004
It's a lovely peice.
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Oct 3, 2004
thanx :glomp:
Reply
:icontearofpurity:
tearofpurity Featured By Owner Oct 3, 2004
Wow! *picks jaw up from the floor* this is so beautiful...
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Oct 3, 2004
:) thank you... :hug:
Reply
:icononeinmany:
oneinmany Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2004  Hobbyist Photographer
flows nicely...I like it very much...especially the last line (also the title) ..an eternity without wings...its moving
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2004
:hug: thank you
Reply
:icondirtangel221:
DirtAngel221 Featured By Owner Oct 1, 2004
Very nice...me likes.
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2004
cool =D
Reply
:iconbaka-fujin:
baka-fujin Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2004
Absolutely beautiful..And I love that you used the word yester,I just don't see that a whole lot!
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2004
:) thank you, it just seemed to fit there
Reply
:iconnocturnal-creations:
nocturnal-creations Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2004
This is so emotional and real. I love the lines "close your eyes to see" (b/c I love phrases that contrast and contradict each other) and the line "His colours painted me" simply because it's so elegant and romantic. Well done!! This is a fav!!
Reply
:iconlost-faith:
Lost-Faith Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2004
thank you so much, I like love contasts and contradictions as well, but I did it unintentionally here
Reply
:icontrinidadhunni:
Trinidadhunni Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2004  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Oh wow, that is gorgeous. It has so many feelings put into it too. Wow
Reply
Add a Comment:
 
×

More from DeviantArt



Details

Submitted on
September 28, 2004
File Size
1.6 KB
Thumb

Stats

Views
1,474
Favourites
16 (who?)
Comments
63