Blinx vs. Vexx - The Fight

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Literature Text

(The camera switches on to an office that looks like a bomb went off in it; the camera itself has a crack in the lens and is recording in very poor quality. Davenport is busy putting out fires while Xamweth is sitting in the middle of the office trying to calm down; he is in his base form, but chaotic energy is billowing off him like steam. A few seconds after the camera starts recording, the energy starts dying down and Xamweth gets up.)

Xamweth: (sighs) Okay; I’m good… I’m good…

Davenport: (turns to look at Xamweth cautiously) You sure you’re fine? You did demolish your own office faster than Adam could throw Chase across the room…

Xamweth: I’ll be feeling much better after tossing YOU across the room.

Davenport: (eyes widen) … I’ll take your word for it!

Xamweth: Anyways, the combatants are set; let’s end this debate once and for all!

Davenport: (puts out the last fire and tosses the extinguisher away) Alright then, now that everything is no longer on fire, it’s time for a Death Battle. Start the fight!

Blinx was enjoying a plea-

Xamweth: WHOA whoa whoa whoa; hold up, hold up! Donald, what the heck was that?!

Davenport: Um, I just said, it’s time for a Death Battle and moved on.

Xamweth: … That’s not how this works…

Davenport: Oh what were you going to do; yell the phrase “It’s time for a Death Battle” at the top of your lungs?

Xamweth: … Maybe…

Blinx was enjoying a pleasant lunch in the Time Factory’s cafeteria. After cleaning the messes involving B1Q64 and the Big Crystal, he was thinking of asking the CEO for a vacation.

“Hello, Blinx!” the waitress greeted the Time Sweeper warmly as she collected the dishes he wasn’t using anymore. “Are you enjoying yourself?”

“Yes, I am; thanks for asking!” Blinx replied, sticking a piece of fish in his mouth.

“Good to hear,” the waitress nodded, and was about to walk away to another table when the Time Factory’s alarms went off.


Blinx started at the announcement, jumping up from his chair. He remembered the last time the Time Factory had been invaded, and it had almost resulted in the destruction of all existence. Whoever this intruder was, he wouldn’t get anywhere near the Big Crystal if Blinx had anything to say about it!

Blinx hurriedly pulled out a large crescent-shaped crystal of gold and handed it to the startled waitress, telling her to keep the change as he rushed to his quarters to grab his Sweeper.


By the time Blinx had gotten to the Gate Room, he was very nearly too late. The mutilated body parts of various Time Sweepers were strewn all over the place, and blood coated the walls. Blinx looked up to the platform containing the Gate to K3C16 in time to see a Time Sweeper brutally torn in half by what appeared to be the intruder.

He wore a torn tunic and boots, and was hairless aside from a shock of wild black hair on his head. He appeared to have a cat-like face, long pointed ears and an almost feral expression on his face. But the most shocking thing about him was his hands; they were easily the size of his head, and had large wrist guards and vicious metal talons in place of his fingertips.

Little did he know that he was looking at the Guardian of Astara, Vexx.

The boy had sent many years wandering the desolate landscape of the Shadowrealm in search of a way back home, fighting off Shadowcreeps and any other beasts that dared approach him. Now, he had seen a Gate open in the middle of an empty plain and immediately seized his chance of freedom. Next thing he knew, he was in a large industrial area, and hordes of large cat-like creatures were converging upon him.

Vexx had mercilessly slaughtered the Time Sweepers, assuming that they were in league with the creatures of the Shadowrealm. Now, there was yet another one looking up at him with a look of rage and determination on its face.

With a vicious roar, Vexx leapt down from the platform and hit the floor with nary a scratch on him, then jumped up and assumed a fighting pose, a bloodied talon gently curling to taunt Blinx.

Blinx hefted his Sweeper and pointed it squarely at Vexx. Whatever he was, he had clearly proven himself a threat to the safety of the multiverse, and as a Time Sweeper, it was his duty to vanquish any such threats.

Only one of the two fighters would be walking away alive.


Vexx charged at Blinx, who instinctively jumped to the side to evade the uppercut the Guardian sent his way. Blinx quickly sucked up a large piece of piping that was lying on the floor and shot it at Vexx. Unfortunately, Vexx had recovered from his stumble and easily jumped over the projectile.

Blinx jumped back to evade the Ground Pound Vexx sent his way and slapped a button on his Sweeper to activate a Time Control as the Valdar dived down to strike the cat down. Instantly, the room was bathed in a blue aura as time came to an abrupt halt, freezing everything but Blinx in place. By the time the Pause Control had run its course, the Time Sweeper had swept up four large chunks of stone that had fallen from the ceiling.

Vexx drove the War Talons down, and blinked as he noticed that he wasn’t standing on a freshly mutilated corpse. This confusion turned to pain as Blinx connected with the first true blow of the fight. Shaking off the stony debris, he jumped up just in time to evade another boulder, and saw the cat fire off a third projectile. This time the Guardian charged directly at it, slicing the stone clean down the middle and pushing through to deliver a three-hit combo to the surprised Blinx, the last strike sending Blinx flying through the door to the rest of the Time Factory.

Blinx shook the stars out of his eyes, and yelped as the Valdar came at him again. He bent backwards to avoid the claws aimed his face, and shot Vexx point-blank with the last chunk of masonry in the Sweeper. As the Guardian flew back, Blinx took to his heels and ran. Vexx was quick to regain his footing, and took off after the Time Sweeper as the fight progressed deeper into the Factory.

Arriving at the Factory’s coolant system with Vexx hot on his heels, Blinx jumped to the side as Vexx slammed his fist down where the cat used to be. Blinx took the time to sweep up two old gears and three trash cans lying around while Vexx pulled the Talons free. As Vexx turned to him, Blinx noticed all the large tanks of water in the room, and an idea came to mind. As the Guardian came at him again, he activated a Record Control and led Vexx over the nearest tank. As the timer ran out, he jumped up to seize a pipe hanging over the water and just before Vexx could hit him…

… time reversed.

When the flow of time reverted to normal, Blinx dived to the side as Vexx took off after his green-coloured duplicate, his foe’s eyes only seeing the Recorded actions of the Time Sweeper. Blinx took the moment of leisure to sweep up another gear, and then turned to wait for the Record to wear off.

Vexx ran after the cat as he ran around the tanks of water, eventually jumping up to a pipe dangling from the ceiling. The Guardian smirked as he jumped up to impale Blinx, only for the cat to vanish into thin air. Eyes widening in surprise, he twisted in midair to see the real Blinx shoot a large gear at him. Unable to evade the attack, Vexx took the gear to the face as he tumbled into the liquid coolant.

Blinx nodded in satisfaction as he turned to leave, confident that the intruder had been dealt with. Vexx, meanwhile, was rather incensed, scarcely able to believe how easily he’d been duped. The Guardian allowed the Talons to release a stream of energy, propelling him towards a pipe opening in the side of the tank.

Blinx walked along the walkway between the tanks, whistling a little tune to himself as he headed for the exit. With the intruder eliminated, he could report to Mother Computer that there was no longer any threat to the Factory.

But then Vexx burst out of the water beside him like an avenger of Heaven. Blinx spun around in shock that the Valdar was still alive, but wasn’t quick enough to raise the nozzle of his Sweeper before getting his face ripped in half by the angry Guardian.

Vexx would’ve won right then and there had Blinx not stocked up on Retries beforehand. A few moments later, Blinx was where he had been seconds before Vexx’s ambush with full knowledge of what would happen. Blinx prepared his sweeper for the upcoming attack, not willing to let himself be caught off guard again.

Vexx burst out of the tank of liquid coolant once more, but this time Blinx was ready. He jumped forward as Vexx’s Talons impaled the walkway, and spun around to fire a trash can.


Vexx jumped forward to continue his momentum, causing the can to sail harmlessly by his ear. Silently thanking the Talons for their warning, Vexx spun around to face the Time Sweeper with a determined expression on both their faces.

Vexx ran scenarios through his mind. The cat was certainly a tricky foe, that was for certain: he appeared to possess powerful magic about him; he even seemed to be clairvoyant! Simple slicing and dicing wouldn’t avail him in any significant way, but what would a red-hot brick do?

Blinx shot off his second trash can, but it was knocked off course when a sudden telekinetic force took hold of it, as well as any and all nearby debris, and shaped it into a shell around Vexx. Not liking where this was going, Blinx shot his last trash can at the shell, but it simply bounced off.

A few moments later, the shell shattered, revealing the red-coloured suit of stone armour that had formed around Vexx. The Rock Suit-clad Valdar grinned as he charged at the Sweeper. Blinx stumbled back in terror, shooting off the last two projectiles in the Sweeper, but the gears fared no better than the cans and were easily reflected off, and Vexx quickly covered the distance between them and seized Blinx’s throat, incinerating the cat as he crushed him under his fingers.

Once Blinx’s second Retry had rewound time to the point in time where Vexx’s Rock Suit had begun to form around him, Blinx didn’t bother wasting his restored ammunition; he just turned and ran. He looked over his shoulder as he fled, and yelped as the Guardian quickly gained on him, the Rock Suit giving Vexx a speed boost. Blinx’s body took on an orange hue as he quickly activated a Fast-Forward Control to match Vexx’s newfound speed, the two combatants quickly leaving the coolant system behind.

Sensing that the Control was about to wear off, and seeing a large door in front of him, another idea came to Blinx. Against every instinct in him, the Time Sweeper stopped in place and let Vexx slam into him with all his strength. The Fast-Forward Control, moments away from deactivating as it was, unraveled under the force of the blow to protect Blinx from harm, and all that Vexx achieved was to fling the Time Sweeper through the door, surprising the pair of Time Sweepers on the other side.

“Close the door!” Blinx shouted. “Close it, close it, close it!” Though confused, his fellow Time Sweepers quickly responded to Blinx’s order, snapping the door shut.

It was a testament to the Rock Suit’s strength that when Vexx attacked the door with the furious head-on charge, the material composing it, meant to withstand any assault, shattered on impact and sent the trio of Time Sweepers flying. Thankfully (or rather unfortunately), moments after Vexx punched through the door, the Rock Suit’s effects wore off and so when Vexx collided with Blinx and tackled him to the floor, it wasn’t instantly fatal.

Vexx immediately started wailing on Blinx, pelting him with punch after brutal punch and refusing to allow the cat to have even a moment’s reprieve. This torturously sadistic assault went on for a good few minutes before Vexx decided to end it. He drew his fist back and began to infuse it with all the energy held within the amulet he had stolen from the hated Shadowraith Yabu. However, this gave Blinx the chance to aim his Sweeper and once again shoot the Guardian point-blank in the face, throwing him off and allowing Blinx to get up, his face scarred and bruised from the Valdar’s Rage Attack.

Vexx quickly recovered and jumped forward with his charged-up fist with an almost feral roar, intent on ending the fight there and then. Blinx managed to see the attack coming and only just barely avoided getting hit. Vexx kept going, however, and slammed his fist into the wall behind Blinx, the force of the blow utterly vaporizing it and bringing much of the ceiling down. Blinx was able to evade the falling chunks, and he quickly realized he wasn’t going to beat the Guardian of Astara in a straight-on fight. With this in mind, he activated a Rewind Control and rode a chunk of the ceiling up to the next floor as the world took on a violet hue and time flowed in reverse to repair the damage that Vexx had caused.

When time returned to normal, Blinx sprinted for the other end of the hallway he was in just as Vexx struck the wall of the floor below. The Time Sweeper was able to outrun the destruction, but Vexx caught sight of him and gave chase once again, jumping up to the upper floor to pursue his enemy.

Blinx entered the room and realized, much to his horror, that in his haste he had run to the Big Crystal. Quickly looking around, Blinx noticed a pile of warped machinery and a bunch of Time Crystals in a crate nearby. Blinx barely had the time to restock his supply of Retries, Time Controls and ammunition when the door burst open and Vexx stepped through. Blinx jumped in front of the Big Crystal in a gesture of protection, but Vexx only had eyes for the creature that had caused him so much pain over the past few minutes.

The fight was nearing its conclusion, and all the pieces had fallen into place. It was time to end this.

Blinx shot a piece of machinery at Vexx, but a pair of wings burst from the Guardian’s back and propelled him to the heights of the room. Vexx grinned viciously as he rained Ground Pounds down on the Time Sweeper, who frantically evaded the spheres of destructive energy as he shot up into the air in a desperate attempt to hit the Valdar as he soared around the Big Crystal.

Then Blinx scored a lucky blow, hitting Vexx squarely in the chest and causing the Air Suit to dissolve in a flurry of feathers. Vexx tumbled through the air with Blinx watching all the while, but just before the Valdar hit the ground with a loud splat, he halted his downward momentum with a quick Flare Kick, and landed on the ground with nary an ounce of trouble.

Blinx pointed his Sweeper at Vexx and pulled the trigger, but his eyes widened as he only heard a brief click. He was out of ammunition, and thus an easy target for the Guardian of Astara.

Vexx saw his chance and charged forward, nailing the cat with two blows that dazed him long enough for Vexx to deliver a Charged Punch, followed by a vicious uppercut that sent Blinx flying skyward. When Blinx came down to earth, the Guardian jumped up and hit the Time Sweeper with another Flare Kick, and then another, and another, mercilessly juggling the cat and keeping him in the air.

Eventually, Vexx let Blinx hit the ground in a pathetic heap. Vexx calmly walked over to the fallen Time Sweeper and hefted him up by the collar, glaring at him with unbridled hatred as he drew the Talon back to spear Blinx through the gut.

Then Blinx did something completely unexpected: he swung his Sweeper into Vexx’s face.

Vexx reeled backwards, dropped Blinx as he clutched his aching head. Enough was finally enough, and Vexx screamed in pure rage as he charged at the cat, intent on slashing away at him until there wasn’t even enough left to make fertilizer.

But something was wrong. Moving suddenly took more effort than normal, as the air felt like it had turned into treacle. Little did Vexx know that Blinx had used the Sweeper as a distraction to activate a Slow Control. It was now a race against time as Blinx tried to get up before the Control wore off.

Blinx won the race by the merest of nanoseconds, and reared back just as the golden aura of the Slow Control faded from the room and the War Talons lacerated the spot where he just been. Blinx activated another Pause Control before Vexx could leap at him again, and ran a quick self-diagnostics check. His ribs were fractured and his face was ruined, but he could still fight. He quickly jumped back to the pile of machinery and sucked up a few more pieces of machinery, as well as a rather large chunk of stone that had fallen while the Time Sweeper had been shooting at Vexx’s Air Suit.

When the Pause Control wore off, and Vexx saw Blinx standing, and still ready to fight, he lost it. The Guardian roared as he released the Charge built up in the Talons, ready to destroy Blinx. Blinx activated another Fast-Forward Control as Vexx took off with insane speed, firing blasts of blue flame from his hands and setting the room ablaze. In between sweeping up the resulting fires, the Time Sweeper occasionally fired a piece of machinery at the Valdar, only for the projectile to be deflected by a ferocious backhand.

Eventually, Blinx was on his last legs. The long fight had taken its toll on the cat, and he was just about ready to drop. He saw the Guardian charging at him again, and quickly aimed his Sweeper and shot the gigantic boulder at him.

Had Vexx been thinking rationally, he would’ve realized that the boulder was too big to smash and jumped out of its path; but his mind was clouded with pain and anger, and so he pooled all the remaining Talon Charge into his fist and attacked the projectile, causing it to explode.

When the dust settled, Blinx crawled over to the remains of the boulder, pausing only to look up at the Big Crystal to check on its integrity. To his relief, the Crystal had miraculously been unscathed by the fight, and so he kept going. Taking a peek through the debris, he saw Vexx crushed under a large chunk of the boulder. The Time Sweeper checked for a pulse; there was none.

Satisfied that the threat to the Time Factory had been finally eliminated, he rose to his feet. Using his Sweeper as the makeshift crutch, he left the room to report to Mother Computer.


Davenport: BOOM! (blows imaginary smoke from a finger gun, and then ‘holsters’ it)

Xamweth: ‘Boom’, indeed; Vexx’s long-awaited spotlight didn’t last long…

Davenport: Well, he’s never gone up against a time master before…

Xamweth: True… well, Vexx may have had the advantage in terms of close-range combat and superpowers, but Blinx trumps him with superior long-range combat and his time manipulation.

Davenport: Oh yeah, the time manipulation is easily a game-breaking ability; that pretty much won the fight right there!

Xamweth: Yeah, Blinx’s Slow and Fast-Forward Controls pretty much negate both the Rock Suit and the Talon Charge’s increased speed, Record can easily fool Vexx into attacking something he normally wouldn’t and the Guardian has no defence against Pause and Rewind.

Davenport: And even without the Time Controls, Blinx has a few advantages; he can get rid of potential dangers by sweeping them up in that overpowered vacuum cleaner of his, and he can easily outwit Vexx by triggering that temper of his.

Xamweth: Also, while Vexx technically has more health, Blinx does have more lives with his Retries, which he can replenish with the Time Crystals.

Davenport: But we’ll give Vexx some credit; with his Air Suit and superior swimming ability, the kid’s got an edge in mobility, and he didn’t need to worry about losing his only means of fighting because the Talons are pretty much a part of him, literally.

Xamweth: Still, Vexx ended up getting the ultimate timeout!

Davenport: The winner is Blinx. Now uh, do you think Molestia’s still after us?

Xamweth: (checks the surprisingly untouched security monitors) Well, it has been a while; and I don’t see her anywhere near my office, so I’d say we’re safe.

Davenport: Oh thank goodness… that means I can finally get back to my lab! Say, Molestia said there were teleporters to take the writers back to their homes; are there more than one of those?

Xamweth: Well, the closest one is the third door down the hall from here turning right, but –

Davenport: Okay then, see you around, Xamweth; it was fun working on a Death Battle with you, but I need to get going. (heads for the door)

Xamweth: Whoa, hold up, that teleporter’s been malfunctioning as of late…

Davenport: Doesn’t matter; as long as I get home to my kids, I don’t care. (leaves)

Xamweth: … (mutters) Alright, but if you come back here with hands for feet and vice versa, don’t come yelling at me…

The Lab, Davenport’s House, Mission Creek

Chase and Leo had been spending the last few days trying to create a device that would help them find Donald, while Adam and Bree were working on convincing Douglas to snap out of his panic attack. So far, neither group had had much success.

Chase was busy coughing and waving away the smoke from the remains of the latest machine while Leo picked up the fire extinguisher and put out the fire.

“Well, I guess we can rule out that design…” Chase muttered.

“Yep,” Leo nodded, “three hundred and forty four down; at least ten thousand to go…”

“I don’t understand!” Chase groaned. “We replicated the exact co-ordinates Mr. Davenport put into Douglas’s interdimensional transporter, but no matter what we do, any attempts to build a monitor or a receiver for another transporter go up in smoke!”

“Literally,” Leo gestured to a few of the other attempts at a machine to find Donald, all of which were little more than charred husks.

Chase opened up Donald’s files and began checking for what the problem was. “Maybe whoever has Mr. Davenport is using a jamming device that blocks any signals from other dimensions…”

Leo looked at Chase uncertainly. “…Uh, if that’s the case, then how did Big D get there?”

Chase hesitated. “… Well, either they realized who they had and how he got there and didn’t want anyone following him, or the jammer was always there and it suffered a momentary glitch that let Mr. Davenport slip through?”

Leo raised an eyebrow. “You have no idea what the problem is, do you?”

“No I don’t,” Chase sagged. “What are we gonna do?! I mean, for all we know, Mr. Davenport is out in some random dimension fighting off pig zombies! … Or running from pig zombies…”

“I just hope Adam and Bree are having better luck than we are…” Leo muttered.

“Nope!” Bree answered as she and Adam walked up to the pair. “Douglas is still curled up on the couch.”

“Couch?” Leo asked. “Don’t you mean the floor?”

“Adam dragged the couch down to the lab and put Donald on it…”

“What, if he’s not gonna budge, the least we can do is make him comfortable!” Adam protested.

“… Well, he does have a point there…” Chase conceded. “Is he eating at least?”

“Yeah…” Bree looked back at Douglas, who was slowly chewing on a donut.

Chase raised an eyebrow. “…Well, it’s something…”

“We’ve tried everything; we’ve tried comforting him, we’ve tried bribing him, we even tried outright yelling at him!” Bree grumbled. “Heck, Adam literally pulled him out of his little ball and made him stand up; he just curled back up and sat back down.”

“If I had to guess, I’d say he’s not gonna snap outta that funk until Big D gets back,” Leo surmised.

“Well, in that case, let’s work on getting Mr. Davenport back!” Bree announced.

At this point though, a familiar voice rang out, “Or he could get back home by himself.”

In the other room, Douglas immediately perked up at the sound of his brother’s voice. He then jumped up and ran past Adam, Bree, Chase and Leo as he tackled Donald in a fierce hug.

“Thank God you’re home, Donny; I’m so glad to see you’re alright!” he cried, then promptly changed his tune and released his brother. “Uh, I-I mean, what is wrong with you, man?! Next time, check that you’re not messing with my stuff!”

Donald smiled and laid his hand on Douglas’s shoulder. “I missed you too, Duggy,” he nodded.

“Mr. Davenport, what happened?” Chase asked his surrogate father, cutting straight to the chase (no pun intended). “Are you injured? The pig zombies aren’t following you from the other dimension, are they?”

“No, I’m not injured,” Donald reassured his son. “Although I was nearly scarred for life…”

“How so?” Leo asked.

Donald hesitated. “W-well… Bree, do you remember that weird Pony Blog that was discontinued?”

“Yyyeah, Ask Princess Molestia; what about it?” Bree asked cautiously.

“Well, as it turns out, she’s kinda real…”

Bree’s eyes widened at his revelation. “WHAT?! Oh god, ohhh god, I did not just hear that, I did not just hear that, I see sick things in my mind, make it stop, make it stop!”

“Bree, Bree, relax,” Donald was quick to calm her down. “I’m fine; some guy calling himself Xamweth saved me from her.”

Bree turned to Donald with a look of bewilderment. “How? How did this Xamweth guy help you? That thing is basically a perverted version of Celestia! You’d need to be have, like, godlike abilities to even stand a chance!”

“Well, I don’t know about ‘godlike’,” Donald shrugged, “but he is able to create a disaster area in less than a minute…”

Adam’s eyebrows shot up at this. “Oh, so that must be why you look so different!”

Donald frowned. “Adam, what exactly is that supposed to me– guys, what is he talking about?”

“Uh, nothing; he’s just spouting gibberish!” Douglas frantically remarked.

“Yeah, you look great!” Leo followed up.

Then Adam wrecked their efforts by saying, “Yep, you definitely don’t have green hair or yellow skin.” He then turned to his siblings and muttered, “Saved it!”

“I WHAT?!” Donald yelped, and then ran to an inactive computer and checked his reflection in its surface.

The group just stepped back and muttered, “3, 2, 1…”

Donald’s horrified scream at his new appearance could be heard all across Mission Creek.


+ Time Controls are essentially gamebreakers
+ Has more lives than Vexx
+ Can get rid of certain environmental dangers
+ Unlike Vexx, Blinx can easily replenish his extra lives thanks to the Time Crystals
– Vexx can easily punish Blinx if his Sweeper runs out of ammo
– Presumably cannot swim as well as Vexx

+ The superior in close-range combat
+ Has much better mobility
+ Technically has more health than Blinx
– His Elemental Suits and Talon Charge only last a short time
– Has no defense against Blinx’s Time Controls
– His temper can blind him to traps
At long last, this fight is done and dusted!

Vexx belongs to Acclaim Studios.
Blinx belongs to Artoon and Microsoft.
© 2014 - 2023 LordXamweth
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ToxicMouse77's avatar
Huh, so I'm not the only person who remembers Vexx.