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About Literature / Hobbyist Alexander Jay WeinzatlMale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 7 Months
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TotDB- Book Page 250- Idea Thing by TheYUO TotDB- Book Page 250- Idea Thing :icontheyuo:TheYUO 12 4 hey by ShivaWalker hey :iconshivawalker:ShivaWalker 156 7 Veezara by GalooGameLady Veezara :icongaloogamelady:GalooGameLady 706 66 skyrim - nightingale by justduet skyrim - nightingale :iconjustduet:justduet 4,424 204 Skyrim mix by HATE0619 Skyrim mix :iconhate0619:HATE0619 26 0 skyrim by SchastnySergey skyrim :iconschastnysergey:SchastnySergey 2,227 132 Daughters of Skyrim: The Warrior by Erulian Daughters of Skyrim: The Warrior :iconerulian:Erulian 616 55 Mother Needs Me by mbrisa Mother Needs Me :iconmbrisa:mbrisa 235 17 Cicero by HOLOI Cicero :iconholoi:HOLOI 22 4 Cicero's Puppet Theatre by NorroenDyrd Cicero's Puppet Theatre :iconnorroendyrd:NorroenDyrd 63 38 TES Skyrim Cicero by ZVilka TES Skyrim Cicero :iconzvilka:ZVilka 828 53 Cicero and Listener by Smeha Cicero and Listener :iconsmeha:Smeha 175 13 Salandit by TheBowtieOne Salandit :iconthebowtieone:TheBowtieOne 79 3 Salandit by CuteSkitty Salandit :iconcuteskitty:CuteSkitty 266 8 Team Edgy by PacificPikachu Team Edgy :iconpacificpikachu:PacificPikachu 40 5 Litten by nightsanghaw Litten :iconnightsanghaw:nightsanghaw 477 18

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loopyfierce
Alexander Jay Weinzatl
Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United States
I encourage any input anyone can give me in regards to the arts of drawing or writing. I would like to develop the skill, and I probably need help. I'll be honest, I'm not great.
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You tell me to be happy,
You tell me to find a therapist,
To untangle the intricate assortment of knots that tighten around my heart like a hangman's noose.
You say, "it gets better."
But
You don't quite understand.
Have you ever stopped to think, between your brief looks of pity
That I don't want it to?

Now, what an awful thing to say.
Let me explain.

Consistency.
That's what my depression provides.
The icy spear of agony that pierces my heart offers more shelter than anything you can come up with.
It's the cold brick wall that I lean on after pulling through a hard day.
It stays, waiting to greet me at the door of hardship and loneliness.
The anguish lays dormant in my mind, whispering in my ear so I don't forget of its existence.
My depression is not a monster. It does not pursue me with clawed fists, nor a dark aura.
It offers its hand in a display of honesty. Trust.
It leaves an empty void in my brain, teaching me the irrationality of filling it with fickle people who all eventually notice what a tedious addition I am to their lives.

It's not a terminal illness or disease.
My depression is a bittersweet melancholy with a promise of continuity.

Don't tell me to push it away.
It's been there for me more than you have.
    I'm obviously new on this site, and my illustrating prowess could most definitely use work. However, I would like to move forward in my writing. If anyone has any requests, I would appreciate them immensely. I will write almost anything, and I'd love to hear your ideas. 

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:iconfranken-fish:
Franken-Fish Featured By Owner Jul 2, 2018  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks for faving :hug:
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:iconlenalog:
LENALOG Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2018  Hobbyist Digital Artist
thank you for the watch owo
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:iconarasteia:
Arasteia Featured By Owner Jun 15, 2018  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you so much for the watch, and welcome to deviantART! If you have any questions feel free to ask! ^^
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:iconn0ctrne:
N0ctrne Featured By Owner Jun 15, 2018  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks so much for the :+devwatch:! And welcome to dA! :)
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