Jedi: Hello, fellow Ninjas, Jedi, and Padawans, I AM JediNinja5, and today we're doing a test run of what we hope will be a new regular feature in our channel, (cue title card) The Lunchin' Loony! Starring everybody's favorite cooking lunatic, Chef LoonyLizard! (token applause)
Loony: Now right off, I'm afraid I must correct you. I am NOT a chef. I've never been to culinary school, I don't have the knife skills, and I've never worn a white jacket in my life.
Jedi: Here I thought you were a chef.
Loony: No, no, at best, I'm a flavor mechanic.
Jedi: I could have sworn you were a chef.
Loony: That memory of yours leaks worse than a sieve in a paint shaker, poor lad.
Jedi: Anyhoo, what are we fixing for lunch today?
Loony: Today, we're getting back to basics with the simple, classic BLT. Easy to prepare, a delight to the palate, and since both lettuce and tomatoes are in season, it's fairly cheap, too. Especially if you have gardening neighbors who like to share.
Jedi: I don't really like