I lay here, completely lost
I lay here shaking
Waking and sleeping
In my empire of dust
I can’t move, physically
I don’t have motivation
I don’t want reincarnation
Could my soul be lively?
I’m infinitely scared. Terrified.
Of absolutely all. Responsibilities
Of myself and my capabilities
From all, outside myself to inside
So I find myself stuck, paralyzed
Everything’s gone, empire of dust
Blind, unknowing, to what I must
Won’t I die right here, fossilized?
In my empire of dust.
Self
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Literature
Empire of Dust
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Literature
Until When
When I stop breathing
I always have to wonder
Until when?
Sometimes it's an evening
Or just one breath before going under
Again and for how long then?
It's a terrifying thing
To just lose it
And it seems endless
Like a piercing sting
Or hit after hit after hit
It turns to distress
Maybe you scared me
Or maybe it's coming from inside
Sometimes it's my past too
Regardless, I cry out a plea
And fold on myself to hide
Wondering what to do
All I want is to air in my lungs
All I'm asking for is composure
And I'm praying for this to stop
In my head a million tongues
Clicking and clacking with disclosure
Of my worst fears in every saliva drop
Basking in my own head, drowning
It takes my breath away, suffocating
And I just have to ask: when will it end?
I can see the abyss rising, in downing
I can't function, incapacitating
And all I want to know is until when
I always have to wonder
Until when?
Sometimes it's an evening
Or just one breath before going under
Again and for how long then?
It's a terrifying thing
To just lose it
And it seems endless
Like a piercing sting
Or hit after hit after hit
It turns to distress
Maybe you scared me
Or maybe it's coming from inside
Sometimes it's my past too
Regardless, I cry out a plea
And fold on myself to hide
Wondering what to do
All I want is to air in my lungs
All I'm asking for is composure
And I'm praying for this to stop
In my head a million tongues
Clicking and clacking with disclosure
Of my worst fears in every saliva drop
Basking in my own head, drowning
It takes my breath away, suffocating
And I just have to ask: when will it end?
I can see the abyss rising, in downing
I can't function, incapacitating
And all I want to know is until when
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San Pascual
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Under My City
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Literature
Haunting Memories
Broken up, broken apart
We're right back at the start
Tearing up, swallowing pride
I said I was ok, guess I lied
High and low, up and down
Going around the Merry-Go-Round
The clock tick and tocks fast
Look it's time to remember the past
Wait a precious moment
Did you forget your torment?
Never forget, always remember
Inside your heart's burning in fire
You thought it was all powder
You thought it was all over
But inside there's still ember
And that's enough to start a fire
I believed the heat inside was passion
But the demon is the king of deception
I feel my insides filling up with water
The pressure hurts but it kills the fire
Breathing in and breathing out
I am born again, I can finally shout
As I spat my emotions I spat my heart
And when I look at it, I'm falling apart
Broken up, broken apart
We're right back at the start
Tearing up, swallowing pride
I said I was ok, guess I lied
We're right back at the start
Tearing up, swallowing pride
I said I was ok, guess I lied
High and low, up and down
Going around the Merry-Go-Round
The clock tick and tocks fast
Look it's time to remember the past
Wait a precious moment
Did you forget your torment?
Never forget, always remember
Inside your heart's burning in fire
You thought it was all powder
You thought it was all over
But inside there's still ember
And that's enough to start a fire
I believed the heat inside was passion
But the demon is the king of deception
I feel my insides filling up with water
The pressure hurts but it kills the fire
Breathing in and breathing out
I am born again, I can finally shout
As I spat my emotions I spat my heart
And when I look at it, I'm falling apart
Broken up, broken apart
We're right back at the start
Tearing up, swallowing pride
I said I was ok, guess I lied
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Untitled
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Blast Up
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Evolution Of A Crisis
Right, left, upside down
Running walking and flying
I'm making myself drown
Trying too hard on everything
My train of thoughts goes so fast
It has completely gone off track
I don't remember how felt the past
I need to slow down before I crack
Breathing in and breathing out
Why is this simple task so hard
Racing heart, quivering mouth
I'm writing so I won't fall apart
Closing my eyes shut, but not tight
Welcoming the dark, accepting it
Without a care for the lack of light
Just falling down in a comfortable pit
Letting my tears run down freely
Ignoring the beats of my heart
Disconnecting, finally being free
My soul is flying and making art
Running walking and flying
I'm making myself drown
Trying too hard on everything
My train of thoughts goes so fast
It has completely gone off track
I don't remember how felt the past
I need to slow down before I crack
Breathing in and breathing out
Why is this simple task so hard
Racing heart, quivering mouth
I'm writing so I won't fall apart
Closing my eyes shut, but not tight
Welcoming the dark, accepting it
Without a care for the lack of light
Just falling down in a comfortable pit
Letting my tears run down freely
Ignoring the beats of my heart
Disconnecting, finally being free
My soul is flying and making art
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This is a video project I worked on all semester on for my class called "8 Months And Counting".
A series of poetry readings and frame by frame digital animations, presented in chronology and thematic, reviewing my personal evolution through mental health struggles in an immersive online platform.
It was quite a project and I'm really happy with it!
eightmonthsandcounting.tumblr.…
A series of poetry readings and frame by frame digital animations, presented in chronology and thematic, reviewing my personal evolution through mental health struggles in an immersive online platform.
It was quite a project and I'm really happy with it!
eightmonthsandcounting.tumblr.…
deviantID
lolnyny
Fanny Lortie
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
Canada
|
Hello! I'm a multimedia artist, nowadays I'm more into video art (though with an extended practice which includes programming, performance, animation, installation and more!), which you can see on my Youtube channel (EmberCoal, link below), but otherwise on here what I like to share is mainly photography and poetry. I'm also exploring 3d printing whilst the technology is accessible at school at least, but I want to really integrate it in my practice. On Youtube: www.youtube.com/channel/UCsX6q… On Twitter: twitter.com/Lolnyny On Tumblr (the artsy one): lolnyny.tumblr.com/ On Tumblr (the derpy one): thatmahblog.tumblr.com/ On FA: www.furaffinity.net/user/ember… On elsewhere: @ lolnyny / @ EmberCoal (I hang in a lot of places online, who knows where you might find me!  )Picture Credits: Photography: Sajad Zand Fursona art:  'Neko' Me art:  |
Activity
Journal History
- Apr 23, 2019 New online-based Video installation
- Dec 22, 2018 Hidden Layers + Bits And Pieces (New Video Art!)
- Dec 4, 2018 THE LOG OFF TUMBLR PROTEST
- Apr 9, 2016 Photography Session Vlog
- Mar 9, 2016 Poetry in film
- Feb 6, 2016 Photoshoots on youtube!
- Dec 15, 2015 Tag (Christmas 2K15)
- Aug 7, 2015 DeviantART 15th birthday questionnaire
- Aug 13, 2014 Photoshoots on youtube!
- Sep 8, 2013 Thank you!!
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news:Do you wish to find me outside dA go
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my profile pageHave a nice day!
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