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About Literature / Hobbyist EloiseFemale/United Kingdom Recent Activity
Deviant for 12 Years
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Newest Deviations

Mature content
Fever :iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 0 0
Mature content
Queen of Cups :iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 1 0
Mature content
A Prayer for the Hungry :iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 0 0
Mature content
Spring :iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 0 0
Literature
homecoming
nearly home. nearly home. a space and time away from where you want to be: belonging to yourself. there is a midnight garden somewhere inside my lungs, black and tarry from the darkness i am siphoning from your lips to mine, trying to let the light in, trying to stop the hurt becoming a euphemism for two vertical red lines drawn in a bathtub. you have turned me inside out. raw, vulnerable; the silence is an agony.  
you have wormed your way inside and I have agreed to be your golem, a clay replacement for the affections of the woman who bedded herself beneath your skin and rearranged your spine. even so, let me give til i am a dry husk, let me pour what’s in my veins over you to wash you back to shore
no lion has eyes like yours, cut from the very fabric of the ocean, you are between dawns and you are limitless in dusk. you are too much a night creature to be good for those who dwell in the day, sitting in the cave of your bed, waiting for the foolish wanderings of curious b
:iconLlywenlla:Llywenlla
:iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 1 0
Literature
Threads and fibres
Prologue
hold back the screams
the low wail of pain, the wounded howl.  
The agony of tattered, muddled hearts  
falling in shadows, dappled on skin.  
decision's gristle don't go down easy
my womb weeping scarlet:  
slow  
shedding  
of self.  
movement aching
the fascia wound taut.
Pt. 1
invaded and altered  
I stand in a wilderness,  
savaging myself with thoughts of you.  
count the last times the way I once counted the firsts
hourglass dwindling
walls splintering.  
suddenly comprised of  
hairline fractures  
scared of moving these brittle bones.  
armchair demon
shotgun destruction  
fallen sword.  
Pt. 2
still haunted by the word 'go'
knowing you are so much better off.  
chanting a failed spell
jar of salt in hand
ready to part the sea  
to change my heart  
but it is wild and stubborn  
I don't understand the tongues it whispers in:
soul divided by a common language  
all
:iconLlywenlla:Llywenlla
:iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 0 0
Literature
Swish-swimming
Honesty never decides to arrive on time.
1. Without fail, drinking alcohol robs me of the ability to feel gratitude for waking up the next day.
2. My apathy will probably kill me, if the shadow doesn’t first.
3. I’m afraid.
4. I like to read for too long in the bathtub, thinking I might be able to dissolve and emerge in the pages of a story better than my own.
5. Sometimes the daydreams are asphyxiating.
6. Farmer’s markets are a source of unending joy.
7. The effect coffee has on my mood is unholy.
8. I often think about being run over.
9. Confession terrifies me.
10. I’ve never been in a fight but I think I’d really, really enjoy it.
11. The good days in Edinburgh were some of the best.
12. Corsica left a hole I’ve not managed to fill. A fabulous ‘could have been better’.
13. Manipulation is me, synonymous with breathing.
14. There’s foundation that says ‘I am good’. I don’t know where mine went.
15. I’m go
:iconLlywenlla:Llywenlla
:iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 0 0
Literature
Hideous Kinky
Give me something more to go on,
lying spread-eagled on the floor and
loving the bump and grind that’s
so at odds with the midnight queen playlist.
The promise of the two-hour-orgasm,
pouring wine from my mouth to yours.
More than the sunset tattoos of bruises,
red hand marks on my flesh.
A different delineation.
A new kind of thrill.
Give me something more to go on:
more than my own desires.
The curling of my toes, held fast on the edge,
blood-basted and sticky.
Slick with the urge to eviscerate my essence
shark-circles slow like southern paddle fans.
And then you say something
along the same vibrating lines
promise me desire and delight
formerly found in the pages of my novels.
Give me something more to go on,
better than my own battered heart.
The streets of Dublin and the armour-piercing
beauty of your hope combine
to undo me, standing in black lace
feeling like a weathervane.
Whilst you smooth yourself over my callouses
embracing the darkest parts
of my tangled salty soul.
:iconLlywenlla:Llywenlla
:iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 2 0
Mature content
Public Speaking :iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 1 0
Literature
Horns
If I was a better person I’d probably not
fantasise
about my boss being dispatched
by the four
horsemen of the apocalypse, Sam Hill
come to claim his due.
Stirred by the sacrifice
of my white teeth:
coffee stained and looking a little used.
If I was a better person I’d probably not
write
about my wants, twist the knife only to
snatch back the words
before they fall out
of my mouth, cosmetics collecting
in the corners
of my lips,
wine-lined and feeling a little empty.
If I was a better person I’d probably not
cry
to try and make things better. Fix you breakfast and
scramble my sense of normalcy.
Tiptoeing Janus-like through life
hating my shadows and my scars
The loathsome parts of me,
soulless and tasting a little bitter.
If I was a better person I’d probably
let you go.
Sentence myself to solitary.
And deal with my demons
Alone.
:iconLlywenlla:Llywenlla
:iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 3 1
Mature content
Baby, come with me to New Orleans. :iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 0 0
Literature
Locust Princess
There is power here.
I feel it coursing through my veins, pooling in my joints.
Embroidering my irises with its frozen fire.
Violin strings and Gregorian hymns lift the potential in this mane of hair,
the cello is a lullaby resounding.
Music is sometimes the only way for me to articulate the butterflies valiantly flapping in my throat.
Something about the endless heartbeat of the drum
the pulse of the world and of my mothers
and my sisters
and those who came before me.
Endless.
It is the rhythm of our feet, one dogged step after another.
When I walked the desert, dust in my ears, in my mouth and in my eyes I knew this drumbeat, I knew this rhythm.
When the nomads banished me from the camp for bleeding, I knew this rhythm.
When I rose against the walls of Jericho, I knew this rhythm.
When I pulled down Babel, I knew this rhythm.
When I was cast from Eden, I knew this rhythm.
Do not stand there in the face of my flesh and deny me goddess.
Do not stand before me and be unable to bear my b
:iconLlywenlla:Llywenlla
:iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 3 4
Mature content
Sugar :iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 3 0
Literature
Corduroy
If hope is a quantifiable, tangible thing, then I think it would be measured in specific coffee-cups. The vessels vary. Most days I find my hope at the bottom of brown cardboard corduroy cups. Other times I partake of it via osmosis, sipping kāfēi with Maggie Cheung from the milk-glass lip, or from turquoise glazed stoneware in nineties sitcoms whose wardrobes I still aspire to (looking at you, Willow Rosenberg. Season 5!)
Today is a corduroy-coffee kind of day, punctuated with two croissants in the morning, like a colon: a pause before the frenzy of nothing begins. Monotony in the sounds of the keyboard clacking pebbles on a stony beach tickled by waves. It soothes as much as it suffocates, Gibran gently reminding me that the lust for comfort murders the passions of my soul.
So maybe I measure my soul in coffee cups, too. Searching for things hidden in caffeine-stimulated creativity and the soft veils that swathe whatever truths I try to write here. Passion. Hope. Noble caus
:iconLlywenlla:Llywenlla
:iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 0 0
Literature
Buzz
Shakespeare devils sit high-cheekboned in the corner of campus, leering and laughing, loud. Too loud, for some, for some not enough to drown the sound of grief. He died at ten forty-five, that’s a quarter before eleven, a quarter minute to make the call and a half second to realise that someone’s left the world. I’ve been waiting for it all weekend.
Insidious the cancer shivered, weaved itself into a tapestry of life and lung and liver. Riddled, not pleasantly, with it - and also questions why it happened and why it wouldn’t stop. But even the best intentions pave the way, so Milton said: there was a path to hell, even from the gates of heaven. He never partook of unleavened bread so according to the Mighty One on High there can be no resurrection.
He went to the office until the day he died. Retired at eighty three, from all he’d ever been. Range-rover lover, fan of corned beef and sardine eggs, beach walks and silver smoke cigarillos. He taught me how to
:iconLlywenlla:Llywenlla
:iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 0 0
Literature
Forty five
Herein soaked the tears I cried over my Grandfathers’ deaths.
When the lions left the pride I laced my face in carpet, rough and needing hoovered.
Spilled salt water on the occasional furniture.
I lost my virginity in that bedroom.
on that floor.
With a guy who had soft hands and rough skin.
And shouted so loud the evangelicals came over to ask if I’d finally found God.
I rubbed that little spot on my coccyx raw with a new bad habit.
Let the red wine stain my teeth
and that one spot on the walls where my fingers slipped.
Setting myself on fire in the kitchen
letting the flames lick my soul
like I’m kindling.
Burning candles and midnight oil,
threw up three times:
no mean feat for an emetophobe.
It’s just four walls,
just bricks and dust, ashes and insects.
A shrine and a temple and a cage and a hovel and
at the heart of it,
was home.
:iconLlywenlla:Llywenlla
:iconllywenlla:Llywenlla 1 5

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Digging beneath dappled shade,
And a chorus of applauding trees.
Crunch.
A sharp-spade chewing sound,
Metal hum like plucked wire.
Aching back, muddy smears,
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It's exploding in my mind, between my teeth, on the tip of my tongue. Waiting to be freed, this cry for attention, love, affection.
I knew you so well; your dreams, flaws, and virtues. I knew the way you looked;what time you woke up in the morning; the way you kissed when you were happy. I could write a book on the way light fell on you and the way you held a hand—my hand. But you closed the book, and here I am, left with the unspoken.
I remember every part of you. I know you; I love you. I can make you the happiest man alive. All you need to do is speak.
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not that you're
it's not like you're killing me or anything
no, just holed up in this little room
and the last words I heard were goodbye
I bite my nails, I scratch my skin
but all I want is to tear out my body
from inside and start over
where I am point a and you were never point b
it's not like you took it away from me
no, just believing what I heard
and finally for once I had it
I clench my fists, I pull my hair
but all I've ever wanted is comfort
from the one who cares
where nobody else can find me
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justdelighted.blogspot.com/

eloise

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Llywenlla
Eloise
Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United Kingdom
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Comments


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:iconllywenlla:
Llywenlla Featured By Owner Aug 30, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
no worries, and thanks! take some photos for me, and don't forget to wear feathers. i'll join you in my vegas showpiece in 5.
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:iconrobot23:
robot23 Featured By Owner Aug 31, 2010
wicked
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:iconburied-thoughts:
Buried-thoughts Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Yay an awesome poet from the uk ive been lookin everywhere (sorry bout that im kinda strange)
i have to say your work is incredible and inspiring
well done
Reply
:iconllywenlla:
Llywenlla Featured By Owner Jun 16, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you! I'm so glad you think so, hopefully I can keep inspiring. I like a lot of your work too, especially your ID!!
Reply
:iconburied-thoughts:
Buried-thoughts Featured By Owner Jun 16, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
your very welcome and thank you
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:iconllywenlla:
Llywenlla Featured By Owner Jul 1, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
a pleasure, i assure you dude!
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconsara-with-a-gun:
sara-with-a-gun Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2010  Hobbyist Photographer
thank you.
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:iconllywenlla:
Llywenlla Featured By Owner Jun 10, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
pleasure
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:iconheather-chrysalis:
Heather-Chrysalis Featured By Owner Feb 9, 2010
Thank-you so much for your beautiful comment, Eloise. It means so much to me to have your admiration and to have impressed you, since you are one of my favorite artists on Deviantart.

Thank-you for visiting my gallery too and for favoring "TEALITE MOMENTS".

You've touched my heart so many times with your poems, I'm glad I was able to do the same for you. Blessed Be.

I wrote this comment on "Tealite Moments" but I forgot to click the reply button first so I don't think you would've received it. My apologies if you're getting this twice. You left me such a beautiful comment that I just wanted to make sure you received my reply.
Reply
:iconllywenlla:
Llywenlla Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Haha, not to worry, thank you for taking the time to comment on my page anyway. Your words are very, very beautiful, very provocative, and I imagine that if they were read aloud, they would entrance people.

They've certainly entranced me.
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