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Emerald Skies Nuzlocke 33 by LizDoodlez Emerald Skies Nuzlocke 33 by LizDoodlez
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:iconrtjgsketch:
RTJGSketch Featured By Owner May 23, 2013  Professional Digital Artist
Brendan's got some unorthodox tactics; why he broke the fury cutter chain after it having hit twice is beyond me. Oh well; his fight, his tactics.
I'm gonna try my hand at this critique thing again. I apologize in advance

In the first panel, I feel that the elektrike isn't showing how menacing it can be; it's almost like he's using his powers casually. If you want to showcase how powerful the electricity is, perhaps have the effort show on his body; front paws spread fairly wide, back paws slightly less so, head down, brow furled slightly, mouth open in a roar, things like that. Similar things could be done in panel 6, such as arching it's back like a cat, have it's feet spread slightly, and having it's head tucked farther down; almost as if it's staring directly at the ground.

Next up, Panel 2. It looks more like Grovyle's coughing, instead of being in pain. Quite frankly, the pose is very nice, but it's the neck and head that creating the 'coughing' idea. Instead of positioning them downward, arch the neck up and back, while having it's snout angle upward and it's head face the right side of it's body. For good effect, perhaps have it's jaw and teeth clenched?
Panel 7, I find having grovyle slump forward would showcase it's condition; back arched forward, neck sticking out and down, shoulders slumped, arms limp and hanging, head looking up, and perhaps an eye twitching in pain.
Panel 8, just transition from the last position.

My favourite part in this comic was, by far, panel 4. I love the strength grovyle is exhibiting, and I love the effects of the attack. Great work on that!
Hope to see you improve even more in the future!Brendan's got some unorthodox tactics; why he broke the fury cutter chain after it having hit twice is beyond me. Oh well; his fight, his tactics.
I'm gonna try my hand at this critique thing again. I apologize in advance

In the first panel, I feel that the elektrike isn't showing how menacing it can be; it's almost like he's using his powers casually. If you want to showcase how powerful the electricity is, perhaps have the effort show on his body; front paws spread fairly wide, back paws slightly less so, head down, brow furled slightly, mouth open in a roar, things like that. Similar things could be done in panel 6, such as arching it's back like a cat, have it's feet spread slightly, and having it's head tucked farther down; almost as if it's staring directly at the ground.

Next up, Panel 2. It looks more like Grovyle's coughing, instead of being in pain. Quite frankly, the pose is very nice, but it's the neck and head that creating the 'coughing' idea. Instead of positioning them downward, arch the neck up and back, while having it's snout angle upward and it's head face the right side of it's body. For good effect, perhaps have it's jaw and teeth clenched?
Panel 7, I find having grovyle slump forward would showcase it's condition; back arched forward, neck sticking out and down, shoulders slumped, arms limp and hanging, head looking up, and perhaps an eye twitching in pain.
Panel 8, just transition from the last position.

My favourite part in this comic was, by far, panel 4. I love the strength grovyle is exhibiting, and I love the effects of the attack. Great work on that!
Hope to see you improve even more in the future!
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:iconlizdoodlez:
LizDoodlez Featured By Owner May 23, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Thanks for the comment. I'll keep everything in mind for later pages.
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:iconazure-23:
Azure-23 Featured By Owner May 23, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I love how you color Grovyle. :3
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:iconlizdoodlez:
LizDoodlez Featured By Owner May 23, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Thanks. :)
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:iconazure-23:
Azure-23 Featured By Owner May 23, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Erp. Not color, Draw. xD
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:iconsureenink:
SureenInk Featured By Owner May 23, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Not to be mean, but just as a thought...people don't get notifications when you reply to your own comment. If you need to amend a previous comment, it's best to reply directly to the deviation again.
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:iconazure-23:
Azure-23 Featured By Owner May 23, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
It was mostly for my sake. xD It bothered me when I saw that.

Thanks for letting me know though. :3 I will be sure to do that in future. ^^
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Submitted on
May 23, 2013
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