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the man's hair was black and very thick, without a trace of gray-although it was somehow immediately clear that he was not a young man. the lines on his face were harsh and strong. His eyes were black, his gaze powerful. He had a proud look to him, as though he thought he owned all the land on which his gaze fell. his shadow, Kes saw, with a strange lack of astonishment, was not the shadow of a man... ~ Lord Of The Changing Winds - Griffin mage book one - Rachel Neumeier

Hora looked up into the sky. His mighty beak glistened in the burning hot sun. The dry Egyptian desert was hard to live in but Griffins found the desert a great home. Camels their favourite prey. His eyes sharp looked from right to left. He knew something wasn't right. He felt uneasy. He had prayed to God for a sign of what this meant but this was not revelled yet, though this did not bother him as he was patient. Hora was ninety-six years of age. That was still young as Griffins could live as long as six hundred years old. Still young. His golden feathers and lion pelt moved as fluid as he walked. The flat sand moved as he took each step printing a mixture of lion paws and bird foot prints. The sand was hot and burning but yet was quite warm under his feet. A flame lit in his bright orange eyes sparkled like glass in the sun. He headed for the flock that was just be hind a tall sand dune.
 As he walked into the flock Dusk, Athena and Mau flew past low. Sisters and friends. Athena a sister of Mau and Dusk a friend. Mau was the oldest at eighty-three and Athena the youngest at thirty six. Dusk was forty. Their red feathers and pelts glowing in the sun though Mau had bits of blond in hers that really caught the sun almost blinding as it flashed.  They were all teen Griffins except for Mau that was now an adult. He was good with kids. He smiled as they flew around him then off to their mothers. Bastet was the Queen and mother of Athena and Mau. Ife the mother of Dusk and friend of Bastet. Bastet was a shy Queen and a great one. Her fire powers were unbeaten. Athena was showing fire talent herself. The King on the other hand Bomani was unbeaten in his flying skills just as Mau, at a young age, was showing.
 Hora took his place on a rock. Bomani walked to him. His fine black feathers like coal and his eyes burning red. As evil as he looked he was kind and trusting.
Hora. My fine friend. Are you well? He asked sitting before the Golden griffin.
I am well Bomani. Though in my heart something unsettles me. The lord has not yet answered why though I am feeling now I wish him not to, Hora replied. His eyes showed his unease. Bomani shook his head.
What ever he reviles we will face. His will be done as they day, Bomani told him. His eyes shifted his face unreadable, though it was clear that he was thinking. Hora nodded. He knew this well. The sun slowly set in the distance. A hot red ember burning in the distance. As red as blood sometimes. Hora watched as it set. Life was good. As the stars slowly come out he watched as the young griffins settled down next to their mums. He rested his head on his claws. Not knowing what tomorrow horrors would come.

 Hora woke suddenly as the ground shook. Sand floated into the air. The air rushed around. It was hot. Hotter than normal. He blinked. Looking into the distance he saw more Griffins. Griffins made of fire. He stood up to react but it was to late. The Griffins were already there. Slashing, biting, burning. Hora looked around for the little ones and found Athena and Dusk.
Quick under my wind! He cried to them. He saw Cadr. His friend.
Cadr quick, this way. Take Dusk! he called. Cadr picked dusk up in his beak. They flew just as a fire made Griffin landed to pick a fight. The fighting was fierce. There was too many.
My sister. Where's my sister! Athena cried as they landed. Hora bowed his head as Cadr was digging into the sand to make a hid. They followed him in. Cadr built the sand back up again to hid the entrance.
 They waited and listened. A fire Griffin stood out side their hid. It sounded like burning wood. Dusk was shaking in fear. The waited three hours before it left. Holding their breath. Standing as still as they could. They took a shallow breath and dug their way out. Athena Climbed the dune. She looked around. Dead Griffins lay in her view. Mau was not there. She let out a pain shaken cry. Hora looked to the sky. His eyes full of anger. His only family was now lying dead before him. He screeched in anger. How could this happen. Why did it happen.
We must go… These lands… they are gone, He told Cadr eyes blazing. His feathers enlighten with fire. Cadr nodded and collected the girls. They padded off towards the sun. Just following their feet hoping something any thing, but knowing this was not finished. Not yet. Their violence was to come back.
This is the first chapter of my story. Enspired by the griffin mage trilogy (in which the first text in italics was taken from) and Egypt.

If any one likes it i'll continue. Sorry about spelling

Chapter two [link]
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MillieBee Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
I like the ending! :D

Your writing has definitely improved since I last read a story by you. You seem a lote more confident - and you should be, you're a great storyteller! The only thing that had me here was the amount of gryphons I was suddenly introduced to. It's going to be hard remembering all those names! :noes:
Little-leopard Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
i've ended up writing most of my Assignments into stories and will be posting them up when i finish my course XD
Russockshitha Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
This is pretty interesting. I like the way you started out with life-as-usual and then introduced the violent attack at night. It shows just how sudden things can change in life. It is also a good example of the power of juxtaposition. I think that if you add a bit more description to both, and added more of a sense of the innocence of a peaceful life and chaos and fear to the attack, you could improve both this chapter and the whole story.
Little-leopard Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
thank you very much for your advise. I do not plan on Publishing this story. I will uses your advise to other books I am planing to do though. I love to experiment with storeys.

I will try and ad in more description into the other chapters.
Little-leopard Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Though saying that i would like to publish something similar
ConnallRobotnik8 Featured By Owner Jan 15, 2011  Student General Artist
Nice prologe!
Little-leopard Featured By Owner Jan 15, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
its not a prologe lol.
ConnallRobotnik8 Featured By Owner Jan 15, 2011  Student General Artist
Well, whatever they're called, your's is good.
TheWarrior123 Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2011
wow! you need to carry that on
Little-leopard Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
oh and take this text as your own and i'll find you and kick your ass!
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