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Literature
Diary of an Introvert - Art and artists
Art is something most of us have been seeing ever since we were born, especially if you're an artist or a generally creative person. So I'd like to dedicate this entry to looking back at the events from my past where I interacted with art and artists, both good and bad, and how it influenced me.
As far as my life went, I've always been the type of person that LOVED to create something. And I'm not just talking about writing or drawing. I always enjoyed leaving some sort of mark behind me. Everywhere I went, I would try something where I could turn things into a work of art and then show it to anyone who'd be willing to stop and look. In kindergarten, I tried working with clay and creating all kinds of things, including bowls, animals, random monsters, etc. However, I always lacked the talent for it. Even the teacher told me that I wasn't very good at it. And because that kinda threw my motivation under the bus, I stopped doing that rather quickly. But that was only one type of artistic
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Literature
Blog 3: Nameless
Today we have a sacrifice from Christopher Keene, a chapter from a future, currently nameless book. He is a fantasy/science-fiction author with a book series involving a rather lethal species of trees.Paragraph 1, sentence 1&2.I strolled through my suburban neighborhood, its streets deserted with Saturday night curfew in full effect. Although anxious to get home, rushing would only attract further attention.Let us start with the phrase ‘in full effect,’ which is unnecessary from a comprehension standpoint. ‘Deserted’ conveys the same information—that there’s no one on the streets except for our rebellious bad boy here. But, it may improve the rhythm, rounding out the sentence so it attains a comfortable length in our heads. This is entirely subjective, and I vacillate constantly between readings, but ultimately am inclined to delete as the disruption to rhythm is only potential and, if real, minor.This brings us to the second sentence which (in only 50% hyperbole) fills me with despair. I like the way this sentence reads, but can’t quite ignore the fact it is grammatically incorrect. The reason for my despair? The solution murders this sentence. The easiest solution is to add an ‘I was’ to the beginning, or an “I knew” after the comma, which is mildly more palatable. This, again, comes to author preference, whether they are a strict adherent to grammar’s tyranny or a vile secessionist. An argument can be made to leave this sentence as is. Yes, it is grammatically incorrect, but it is understandable on every level, feels controlled and (just as importantly) has one of the two cheat codes: it’s first person, which operates under some of the liberties granted to dialogue in that character’s don’t have to be grammatically correct so long as they’re understandable.I have one last comment for this paragraph, centered around the words ‘further’ which conveys a very particular element that seems at odds with the narrative so far, and ‘get’. (How awesome is this opening that you can say that after TWO sentences, see how much information the author conveyed just through word choice and narrative structure WITHOUT having to take you out of the story? Anyway, back to further...) Here, ‘further’ says—more than there already was— indicating that this character already has attention focused on him while being out after curfew. This is either more world building, or a misplaced adjective, and it is hard to distinguish which at this point, and needs mentioning in case it is the second. Concerning ‘get,’ I would consider swapping it to ‘return’ as I think that reads a little better. (You will find that certain words just never read well, such as ‘commence,’ which is almost impossible to use eloquently in writing or speech without sounding pompous and forced.)Edits applied.I strolled through my suburban neighborhood, its streets deserted with Saturday night curfew. Although anxious to return home, rushing would only attract further attention.Paragraph 2, sentence 1-3From tomorrow onward, the curfew would no longer impair me. Just one of the many perks of working for the Terriam conglomerate. Even from here, I could see the Terriam Tower, a monument to their domination over the city. I have two issues with the first sentence, the first being that our main character doesn’t seem particularly impaired by the curfew currently. It’s a minor detail, and undoubtedly nit-picky, but it does matter. The immediate explanation is that he just signed the papers tonight, but even in that case, the sentence is factually wrong because he is no longer impaired by the curfew TONIGHT, not tomorrow.My second qualm is that it does not flow right from the first paragraph. I can’t quite tell if it’s on a word, rhythm, or thought level, but something just does not work. It’s not pleasing to start this second paragraph. Unfortunately I can’t see a real solution to it, I think mostly because I can’t pinpoint what’s causing the discord.On another note, this sentence can be restructure to “Tomorrow would liberate me from the curfew” which cuts several words and is streamlined without sacrificing word potency, but too short on its own. It would need padding or to be married to an ensuing sentence such as... “Tomorrow would liberate me from the curfew, just one of many perks from working for the Terriam conglomerate.” (‘conglomerate’ may need to be capped.)You’ll notice creative liberties with the second sentence, all of these were taken to remove the ‘the’ from ‘one of the many’ and to ensure a pleasing rhythm. In run-down: I deleted the ‘the,’ and swapped the ‘of working’ to ‘for working’ to avoid the echoing ‘of.’ One could also exchange the ‘for’ to ‘under’ potentially, to remove another glue word.Thus we begin the third sentence. There is some rhythm discord here from the second to third sentence, which I attribute to the shift in focus. The first two sentence (four if you count the first paragraph) speak of the curfew, then here we abruptly shift gears to our main character’s view and a distant tower. A segue would help, but might also alter the sentence against the author’s intent. For instance, the easiest segue is “whose tower...” but that necessitates cutting the tower’s name and, because of that, it’s importance. We can restore the importance by adding ‘central’ or ‘regional’ before tower. After that, we would still have to devise an action that simultaneously conveys its oppressive prominence without infringing on sentence’s second half. But, the discord is relatively minor, and more so if you preserve the paragraph’s original structure. So, it’s up to the author to decide which path.This third sentence also suffers from a common trope/parasite in writing, the need to focus a piece of description from a character view, “I could see.” Even without this, we would automatically attribute anything described here as something the character sees. It is not a misstep in of itself, but often unnecessary.The final two changes I would make to this sentence are converting ‘domination’ to ‘dominion’ (purely for rhythm and sound) and ‘the city’ to ‘this city,’ which is more personal, locating the character (and thus readers) directly into its purview, making its oppression ever so slightly more personal.Edits appliedTomorrow would liberate me from the curfew, just one of many perks from working for the Terriam conglomerate. Even from here, I could see the Terriam Tower, a monument to their dominion over this city.Paragraph 3, sentence 1-3Footsteps echoed on the pavement, and a woman in a white jacket appeared on the other side of the road. Auburn-haired and olive-skinned, her beauty was striking, and despite the hour, she did not appear to be hurrying. Her glance met mine, but I swiftly broke eye contact, not wanting to be identified as another delinquent out so late.I like this first sentence, it adds sound into the descriptive mix, and flows well with distinctive words. The final phrase struggles, though, “on the other side of the road” is clunky and bogged down with glue words, sapping her appearance and the prose of momentum. The easiest solution is to replace it with “across the road,” which seems to work from both a comprehensibility and rhythm standpoint, but may add an element of ambiguity.For the second sentence, we have a brief, concise physical description (the second-to-best king,) and a touch of relevant description (the best kind.) The phrase is “she did not appear to be hurrying” which is clunky, but, because of the author’s world and narrative building, carries a prominent threat without him having to lift a finger otherwise. (A threat our main character exudes as well.) We just have to clean it up somehow. The core problem(s) are “did not” and “to be,” which are weak, cluttering, and unpleasing. The first change that occurred to me was “she evinced no haste,” though “displayed no haste/hurry/concern” might work better. I think that change works, but it might be too stilted. A better ending word would be ‘urgency,’ which is a more accurate description of what I think the author wants to convey. ‘Hurry/haste’ can derive from a number of sources, ‘urgency’ (given the context) indicates an element of fear, so the lack of urgency indicates an absence of fear, augmenting this character’s danger signs. I also think, it helps my edit “...and despite the hour, displayed no urgency.” I think that works, but author’s choice. (Mutters menacingly, “Dang authors always getting in the way of my world conquest...)Now, the final sentence, with just a few cuts. I want to delete ‘eye’ because it read’s better, and I think I can get away with it, so I will. We can also delete (ish) ‘another’ and ‘out so late.’ ‘Another’ needs to be replaced with ‘a,’ and the reason is that I don’t know if ‘another’ is saying anything that ‘a’ doesn’t. You might say it conveys the reality of other delinquents, but that information is self-evident, stripping ‘another’ of purpose and rendering it into an iteration. So unless it’s saying something else, which then needs to be expounded upon, swap to ‘a’ which is not an iteration. We’re deleting ‘out so late’ because it’s an unnecessary qualifier, most people will make that connection automatically as it is the only crime we’ve seen our main character commit.With edits applied.Footsteps echoed on the pavement, and a woman in a white jacket appeared across the road. Auburn-haired and olive-skinned, her beauty was striking, and despite the hour, she displayed no urgency. Her glance met mine, but I swiftly broke contact, not wanting to be identified as a delinquent.Complete edited segment.I strolled through my suburban neighborhood, its streets deserted with Saturday night curfew. Although anxious to return home, rushing would only attract further attention.Tomorrow would liberate me from the curfew, just one of many perks from working for the Terriam conglomerate. Even from here, I could see the Terriam Tower, a monument to their dominion over this city.Footsteps echoed on the pavement, and a woman in a white jacket appeared on the other side of the road. Auburn-haired and olive-skinned, her beauty was striking, and despite the hour, she did not appear to be hurrying. Her glance met mine, but I swiftly broke eye contact, not wanting to be identified as another delinquent out so late.That’ll be all for today. If you serenading sasquatches like our content, please consider subscribing to our main site https://writingdeconstructed.com. And, if you like what you’ve read here, check out some of the author’s other content. https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/15561371.Christopher_Keene.
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Literature
On va switcher
Switcher : inverser les rôles, basculer d’un côté et de l’autre. Explorer le Yin et le Yang, visiter le passif et l’actif, le contrôle par la domination et le lâcher-prise par la soumission. Je suis switche, sur tous les plans finalement : le genre, la sexualité, le jeu.
https://ladyerell.com/on-va-switcher-sur-une-etoile-ou-sur-un-oreiller/
#switch #sexploration #bdsm #jeux
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Literature
Planet: Lagnostius
Lagnostius
Planet's name: Lagnostius (Retheria IV)
Star System: Retheria
Astrological Sign: Libra
Population: 3.8 billion
Major population groups: Humans, Senmeth Sidhe elfs and Darakh Sidhe elfs
Number of independent nations: 68
Largest Nation (surface): Ingra Ellea 7365 km2
Largest Nation (population) Akkaraga – 568 millions inhibitors
Largest city: Seteria, capital of Akkaraga – 9 million inhibitors
Polulative origins: Humans derived from Earth, Hercolubus and Gaea, Elves derived from Sartiora, Nibiru, Arnakarn and Earth (the last emigrating Earth elves left for Lagnostius in 1362). Dwarves: Obrion (extinct/emigrated)
Main religions: Troikas, atheists/unregistred, Awarians (sum worshippers), Semn philosophy, Dragosenes (elves)  
Equator Radius: 5836 kilometers (3626 miles)
Density:  5.830 grams per cubic centimeter
Highest Point: Monti Serniarda (Mountain of the gods) 10345 metres (33940 feet)
Aphelion: 193.200.000 km
Perihelion 137.095.000 km
Semi-major axis:
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Literature
myself
I was ten years old the first time I fell in love. I’m not sure I understood what it meant to be in love, nor what it meant for the rest of my life. She was sweet, and all I ever wanted was to hold her hand. I remember us, just ten years old, waiting for our parents in the gazebo at the Renaissance Festival, and it felt like no time would ever pass us by as we sat side by side and hand in hand together.
It, of course, did not last, as most childhood love never really does, except for in daydream-like memories. What did last was the realization that I would never be acceptable to the world the way I was born.
I was 12 years old the first time I told my mother I loved girls. To me, this was the greatest revelation of my entire life. To her, I may as well have told her I was turning to a life of crime. Sometimes I feel as though she would have preferred I told her that.
Years later, she told me in shallow words at our kitchen table how she had always known. I didn’t come to th
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Literature
tdw - rose and quail advancements
Rose Tide |
Training, that had quite literally been all they had been doing. Other than hunting, eating, and resting of course. The two tabbies stood several fox lengths away from each other in a clearing of the marshlands, soft peat moss below their paws. "So, still practicing Peek-a-Boo, right?" The rose-toned dame called to her brother, tipping her head. She'd been so focused on their new lifestyle, so focused on proving those who doubted them wrong... That she'd hardly had time to think about home. About her mother, father, siblings... Even Finch Feather.
Quail Pool ||
 Anything to get his mind off of the events that unfolded to get them here... anything. This included training, and that's what the siblings had been doing. Quail Pool gave a nod at her question. "Yeah!" He told her. He'd gotten the skill down a while back, but he was more than happy to help Rose Tide figure hers out. "Is there anything about it that's giving you trouble? We can take i
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Literature
Energie et chakra
Mais pour la première fois depuis que l’on se connaît, je ne sens plus sa chaleur, celle que j’aime précisément. Que se passe-t-il ? c’est tellement flagrant pour moi, il est complètement froid.
https://ladyerell.com/energie-chakras-ouverture-fermeture-alignement/
#chakra #énergie #relation #couple #chi
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Literature
Perpetuels coups de foudre
Quand nous avons pu enfin passer une après-midi ensemble, je savais que tu n’irais pas plus loin que des caresses. Tu me trouvais encore trop jeune pour me dépuceler. On en avait parlé librement.
https://ladyerell.com/perpetuels-coups-de-foudre/
#coupdefoudre #rencontre #amour #relation #couple
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Literature
La photographe par Paul G
Je me laisse découvrir des yeux son extrême
sensualité, ou plutôt l’animalité qu’elle dégage. Sa féminité marquée (déjà à travers les formes de son corps) autant que son versant masculin, directif, dominant (…). Elle sent le sexe, elle est le
sexe !!…
https://ladyerell.com/la-photographe-par-paul-g/
#shooting #rencontre #PaulG #pudeur #sexploration #fantasme
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Literature
La derniere seance
Dans la salle d’attente où il me reste cinq minutes à patienter, une fois n’est pas coutume, je n’ouvre pas mon téléphone et tombe sur un petit livre qui attire mon attention. “Journal intime d’une femme…” quelque chose comme ça.
https://ladyerell.com/la-derniere-seance/
#emprise #violence #femme #psy #thérapie #manipulateur #pn
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Literature
Le blessure du rejet activee par le couple
Le temps et l’espace sont propices à tous les délices, ce à quoi nous allons nous livrer pendant les prochaines 30 heures. Tout va très vite, le charme s’opère, nous nous plaisons, bien que j’ai un doute sur ce qu’elle pense.
https://ladyerell.com/la-blessure-du-rejet-activee-par-le-trouple/
#blessure #âme #couple #trouple #rencontre
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Literature
Nigelopia 91-The Girl Whose Butt Laid Waste To Us!
Rachel: Open wiiiiiiide! *Feeds Nozomi a piece of sushi!*
Nozomi: Ouumph! *Chew chew chew* Mm, mmmm~… *Kicks her legs*
Reina here! How are you, sweetie? The FINAL chapter of Rachel, Mathias and Ricky’s Kagaku Story is here. Last time, the curvy yet cruel female robot Jeannie used her charms to manipulate Mathias and Takashi 3.0 into fighting over her in the night skies of Kagaku City! Meanwhile, Rachel was enjoying a romantic date with Nozomi, and after plenty of healthy sex-
Nozomi: *Climaxing!!!* AUAUUUU, RACHELLLLLL~!! *Face contorts with release!*
….And after plenty of healthy sex, they’re sitting on the edge of the top of the Suzaku Building, enjoying the gorgeous neon buildings and skyline of the city, while sharing the 5 pounds of “onarazushi” (mispronounced by Rachel) that Rachel purchased from Good Food before the date, because she was hungry!
Rachie: *Watches Nozomi eat!* I bet you’re glad I bought it now, aren’t you? *Grins!*
N
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