Updates on personal life #2

11 min read

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Lintu47's avatar

Points i'll be covering:
:pointr: Follow up on the sternoclavicular joint pains
:pointr: Follow up on cholesterol
:pointr: Follow up on birth control
:pointr: Kidney surprise
:pointr: Memory loss
:pointr: Changes in my dA activity


I. Follow up on the sternoclavicular joint pains

I still haven't had the MRI done. The swelling is still there and so are the pains, which started to crawl on my collar bone up to my shoulder joint. Sometimes i feel i need an orthosis to support my hand since the pain sometimes is so intense that i cannot even let my hand hang freely without grinding my teeth in pain, so forget any type of effort with that hand. I followed once again a week of treatment with Arcoxia, but it only took the pain away for a few days. The real problem is that since last month i've got a new swelling in the joint of the second rib with my sternum (at the Louis angle). It hurts sometimes when i inhale deeply. I did blood tests and nothing relevant came up, except for a tiny bit VSH elevation (erythrocyte sedimentation rate; it was 20). No rheumatism factor, no nothing to point to a specific affection. My MF believes it might be the Tietze Syndrome, but this would only cover my second rib joint, but not the sternoclavicular one. Nonetheless, i need further investigations and a great Rheumatologist.

I hope i won't have to turn into House, addicted to pain killers because no one can figure out what causing the swelling and the pains.


II. Follow up on cholesterol

Last time i told you i have a borderline cholesterol (it varied over the years between 212 to 222). I am a bit worried about it since i try to eat as healthy as i can, but it still stays up. The good thing at least is that all the values are elevated: total cholesterol, HDL and LDL. I blame this on the stress. My cardiologist told me there's no need for medication since my BT is good and the cholesterol values are balanced, even if they are a bit high.


III. Follow up on birth control

The Yaz ac is doing its job: less pain (sometimes none!) and my organism got used to it, so no more side effects. I'm glad i found the right thing for me.


IV. Kidney surprise

A few weeks ago i was complaining in a poll about the pains of passing a little kidney stone. I must say, that pain was the worst i experienced, along with the flashing one in my head i had two years ago (which left me with a trigeminal neuralgia). Since i didn't want to be a farm for kidney stones, i had an echo done which revealed i have bilateral microlithiasis. I caught it early, so now i'm on a treatment that dissolves the micro stones and eliminate them without pains. I have to drink a lot of water though, which is weird for me since i only drank when i was thirsty.
In the same echo i had confirmed what a semi-incompetent doctor told me a long time ago about my gall bladder: i have an anatomical variation which sometimes makes me nauseaous in the morning. If i develop lithiasis in the future i will have to take it out, but for the moment it's clean, so yay for my twisted gallbladder.


V. Memory loss

I never talked about this in public before because i find it to be very personal and perhaps the worst thing i might have or already have. I've been struggling with memory loss for many years, but i've always blamed tiredness and sometimes depression. Lately i started considering an incipient neurological degeneration (really ironic for someone who needs their memory in great shape). I made some research and found out i've had in my family's past generations Dementia, Parkinson's and something else which i believe was also Dementia, but cannot be sure since there's not really much detail left about that person. Also i don't know if Alzheimer's degenerated into Dementia or it were the strokes who triggered it. I am not hypochondriac and i am too young for this, but i have a few symptoms that point towards early Alzheimer's and i want to share them with you. For the moment i fit into the Mild Cognitive Impairment category, which can and eventually often leads to Alzheimer's. Here's what i have to cope with every day:

:pointr: increasing memory loss (developed over the years, and i'm not the only one who noticed that. I really have to study harder than my colleagues to keep up the pace since i forget what i learn very fast. Let's not forget the fact that i watched whole series like House, The Mentalist and Criminal Minds and i didn't have a clue i did until i got to a special episode, a trigger that marked me back when i saw them the first time).
:pointr: shortened attention span (when i study i read one thing, i get the feeling that i already know it, but if you ask me about what i read i have no idea. I have real problems focusing and retaining new info)
:pointr: difficulty with language and writing (sometimes i have trouble finding the right words, or when translating i cannot express myself properly, although i have the required vocabulary knowledge and i know what i want to say - and i know this because i remember the words hours/days later. It's like a mental block. I know many experience this, but this happens to me on a daily basis; it's hard for me to have an elaborate conversation without taking awkward pauses to find the proper words)
:pointr: difficulty organizing thoughts and thinking logically (I lose my train of thoughts way too quickly, i cannot have an argument with someone without writing down the main points i have to cover. This doesn't really need further explanation; sometimes i feel i have no role in what happens to me because things just tend to happen without or before i make a decision - it's like looking at myself and at what i do through other person's eyes)
:pointr: trouble learning new things (i already covered this)
:pointr: restlessness, agitation, anxiety, tearfulness (thankfully they don't come all at once)
:pointr: repetitive statements (i sometimes ask people the same question in a short period of time and i don't realize i already did it and even got the answer. Sometimes i even get pissed because i'm under the impression they ignore me)
:pointr: irritability (it's not specific per se, but it's on the list of possible symptoms).

I haven't had the chance yet to address a doctor about this and i don't even know who to go to first: a psychiatrist since these can be because of repetitive episodes of depression, or a neurologist. I'd rather try the neurologist because last year i saw two psychiatrists regarding these problems, i had 6 months of medication - which got rid of the depression, but the rest are still there. And it's a vicious circle, because the depressions come back because the rest of the problems are still there and i keep thinking i will die a burden, hurting my loved ones and without knowing who i am or if i ever did anything worthy in my life. Or die alone.

Did any of you had similar experiences with family members or yourself and if so, what did you do? Do you have any idea what kind of tests should i take, aside the cognitive ones? I know i'm into medicine, but for now i just want to forget about it and act like a simple patient, because the info i have access to is... sinister and i don't want to start imagining symptoms just so i could fit into a disease i think i might have.


VI. Changes in my dA activity

I was considering this for more than one year already and today i finally made a decision after having difficulty reading some of my old journals: i will give up the small writing in my comments/journals/articles. Also, i am less active in the groups i'm in since i am stressed about my health and tired from University, so i don't have as much time as i usually had. I entered the final two years of my education and i need to focus more on that.


I cannot emphasize enough the importance of routine checkups and doctor visits when something unusual comes up, regardless of how unimportant it might seem to you at the moment. Please don't ignore your health, it's the most precious thing you were born with and you have to protect it.
I will be back with personal updates when i will have other news for you. I appreciate every message from you, your support means a lot to me. Meanwhile, take care of yourselves and enjoy life! :hug:

*sorry for typos/other mistakes, i am very tired and it took me more than two hours to write this journal*


Don't let the fact that you can say a lot of things on the internet without consequences take away your decency.
Stay safe! ♥

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hypermagical's avatar
:hug: I hope that things only improve from here.