literature

Runner's Curse, Part 2

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As I trudged through the same woods for the umpteenth time, my heavy bulk slowed me even more than it had even the few days before I had gone the same route.  There were even places where the trees came in close, that was actually a visibly closer fit for my girth than it has just weeks before.

This was my new life, ever since that old lady had cursed me, causing me to add hundreds of pounds of fat to my formerly lean runner’s body. Although it was very slow at first, after the third month I was gaining about 30 pounds every week. Those size 54 waist pants I’d bought didn’t even last the week that I bought them before they’d gotten too tight.

While I was definitely failing in my mission to find that old woman, something else was becoming clear. My “runs” in the woods were steadily being reduced to “trots” simply because of the weight I was carrying around. I knew from experience that if I didn’t keep up with my cardio, it could backslide. Soon enough I would be as out of breath just climbing a couple steps as anyone would expect a guy my size to be.

I began to try other means of getting my cardio in. Since I still was technically a student despite not attending any of my classes after the first few weeks, I had access to its facilities. I managed to find a fitness center that got little use, and started going there in the middle of the night. But nothing worked for cardio. I tried a reclining cycle machine, but my gut had gotten so big that it actually interfered with my pedaling. The elliptical cross trainer worked for a while, but soon enough the sticks started to bump against my belly, making even that impossible.

I was in danger of my heart never getting the workout it needed again. Then I had a realization - If I ever wanted to move fast enough to get my heart rate up, I would need to become strong enough to move this bulk around relatively quickly. I immediately set up a regimen of weight training.

Some muscles, such as my biceps and triceps, were easy enough to isolate using the regular exercises, since my bulk was generally out of the way for them. I similarly found I could do lat pull-downs  for my back muscles, and with my gut spreading out over my lap and soon enough the entire bench, I didn’t even have to hook my feet to keep myself down.

Some exercises had to be modified to accommodate my ever-increasing waistline. For instance, I ended up having to do the leg press one leg at a time with my gut off to one side or the other. But besides taking twice as long, it was pretty much the same exercise.

Regular pushups were already impossible, because I couldn’t lower myself much at all without my belly touching the floor. At a certain point it actually supported me, making any muscle resistance next to nothing.  But I solved that problem by putting my feet on one bench and my hands on another. That way I could do a full pushup while by belly hung between the benches. It actually turned out to be a good way to build my pectorals, because as each week went by it was like adding about 20 pounds to a bench press routine.

Sit-ups were totally out of the question, and I couldn’t think of a good way to isolate my abdominals without the vast majority of my fat getting in the way. Fortunately, my pushup routine also worked on strengthening my core – I could feel the burn down there as well as my pecs.

It turned out my potential to gain muscle was pretty good – after eight weeks of weight training, I could feel  myself getting stronger. Beneath all of this blubber I was well on my way to having Mr. Universe-level muscles. And a good thing too, as in that same eight weeks I must have gained another 240 pounds of fat or so. Although I couldn’t see any scale to verify, I estimated that I must have weighed over 600 pounds. Even the otherwise-impressive 15 pounds or so of new muscle was a drop in that huge bucket.

Although these workouts had allowed me to move faster when out for my “runs,” they also bought me some more time to actually be able to move around. I realized that, even if I managed to gain muscle at this elevated rate, eventually it would top off, and my fat gain showed no sign of slowing. It wouldn’t take too much longer before I couldn’t move around at all. Then how could I find that old woman?

Hefting myself up,  I went out yet again in an effort to find her.
A runner ends up with a curse that adds hundreds of pounds of fat to his body in a matter of months.

Sorry this took so long to get out. I wasn't sure what direction it was going to go, and various real-life things got in the way (as usual). Anyway, no promises on when Part 3 will come out, but I do already have a good idea where that will be going, so probably quicker than Part 2. ;)

Part 3

The Beginning
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Just wanted to say that I'm loving this story! I really like that it's almost a counter to the "unhealthy" gaining side of things (which I can never completely get myself behind). Looking forward to the next part(s) when you get to them!