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Bioshock Backstage

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Just a little joke for ending of the Bioshock fanart series.

Jack [link]
Atlas [link]
Frank Fontaine: [link]
Yi Suchong [link]
Julie Langford [link]
Brigid Tenenbaum [link]
Jasmine Jolene [link]
Sander Cohen [link]
Andrew Ryan [link]
Dr. Steinman [link]
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© 2012 - 2021 LenkaSimeckova
Comments19
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SuperSpyro7956's avatar
I take it Fontaine likes that ass he's looking at.

(Of God what did I just write)
TehTadpoleJackson's avatar
Aw, don't yell at Mr. Bubbles! You'll hurt his feelings ;n;
TheWildWestPyro's avatar
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!

Also, I have a crazy fan theory that later, in an alternate universe where Jack saved Rapture and raised the Little Sisters, his adventures were turned into a play, which was a hit with Rapture's theaters. Oh, and Baby Jane became a star.

Oh, and Cohen's directing, and he's hyper. So...

*New Year's Eve scene*
"CUT! SPLICERS! COME ON FIVE MINUTES LATER!"
"CUT! MORE FAKE BLOOD!"1
*Plane Crash*
"CUT! SFX DEPARTMENT! YOU'VE DESTROYED THE LIGHTHOUSE! THE PLANE'S SUPPOSED TO CRASH INTO THE OCEAN!"
*Jack fights Splicers*
"CUT! BABY JANE! COSTUMING DEPARTMENT! MORE BLOOD ON HER DRESS! LADY SMITH! DRINK SOME WATER! TOASTY! STOP HITTING ON ELEANOR!"
*Jack visits Cohen*
*Cue Cohen driving everyone insane as he wants his favourite scene to be as perfect as possible. For example:*
"CUT! MUSIC DEPARTMENT! PIANO SOUNDS OFF! CUT! SET BUILDERS! READJUST THE SCENE! CUT! MY MASTERPIECE LOOKS OFF! CUT, etc."
*Jack fights Steinman*
"CUT! YOU WHO'S TOO SYMMETRICAL! STOP TWITCHING!"
"CUT! STEINMAN! YOU DON'T OPERATE ON THE CORPSE NOW!"
"CUT! CUT CUT CUT! WHY IS EVERYTHING FALLING OVER?" 
*Jack fights Big Daddy*
"CUT! I WANT SLOW, SAD, MUSIC FOR THE DEATH OF MR. B! NOT THE FUNERAL MARCH!"
"CUT! DON'T CRY YET! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO 
*Jack realizes Jolene is his mother*
"CUT! ANDREW! YOU DON'T STRANGLE HER! USE THE LEAD PIPE!"
"CUT! JACK! DON'T STARE IN SHOCK, DROP TO YOUR KNEES AND START SOBBING!"
*Atlas reveals himself*
"CUT! RIP OFF YOUR WIG! CUT! DO NOT DO YOUR EVIL LAUGH IN YOUR IRISH ACCENT!"
*Atlas dies*
"CUT! THE FONTAINE ROBOT'S STOPPED WORKING! FIX IT!"

But it was a good play overall.
Inferna-Firesword's avatar
I can't stop laughing at this comment. Nice job XD
TheWildWestPyro's avatar
Cohen's kind of OOC here, as I got overexcited, but thank you!
Inferna-Firesword's avatar
Considering how critical he was of Fitzpatrick's recital, I don't think he was that OOC xD

You're welcome. ^^
Danny1210's avatar
ChimpanTv's avatar
is that the puppy from the audio logs in the back XD
Myredhulk's avatar
Turns out he's a high pitched barker. No puppies were harmed in the making of this vidia game. :lol:
McFluffy412's avatar
Oh my... really nice xD
Willowwolf23's avatar
Haha this is perfect! :w00t!: :XD: Great way to end the series! :clap:
radishson's avatar
Is Fontaine staring at Tenenbaums ass..? LOL
LenkaSimeckova's avatar
Bingo:D He said about Tenenbaum "She just needs some supplies to get the ball rolling... and a friend to watch her back." in his audiodiary. And with his voice it sounds really perverse:D
TheWildWestPyro's avatar
And if you've read "Bioshock-Rapture" it makes more sense in a really disgusting way.
peterhirschberg's avatar
HHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!! :party:
TheIrishAngel's avatar
What a way to end the series! LOL
BettyFontaine's avatar
LOL, that was good xD
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