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I’m going to try my best in recounting the events that had transpired almost a decade ago in my life. I hope I don’t take too much of your time in reading this. Apologies in advance if there are any inaccuracies I may have made. In my early high school years around 2008-2011, I faced depression and suicidal thoughts on and off again. To illustrate, in my Earth Science class, I had gotten my report card back after slacking off on my homework assignments and my quizzes and tests. At that time I had gotten either a D or an E which worried me because before that time whenever I got a bad grade on my report card, my parents would scold and be disappointed in me for focusing my energies on TV and video games all day long. I was afraid that they would be disappointed and upset at me once more for not doing my job. Wanting not to be a burden upon my family and my teachers I had a plan of offing myself in order to relieve some of the weight. Which at the time, I felt would solve the problem but let's face it, years later, I learned that some problems in life are temporary and can be resolved using different methods. After my declaration, I had a series of chats with my teachers, my parents, and God at school and at home respectively. When I got home I decided to watch some TV in which I stumbled upon an episode of a show that you might probably hear of ‘Attack of the Show’. It was around the time when Kevin Pereira and Olivia Munn hosted the program in their usual routine, they shared internet vids, do crazy stunts and skits. During the episodes, they displayed good chemistry, good wit just to name a few. Consequently while watching the episodes, the show made me laugh and smile which gave me a much-needed distraction from my then ongoing depression/suicidal thoughts. In an alternate saying, they indirectly saved my life from suicide and depression at least a couple of times. (Keep in mind that this instance isn’t the first time overall in watching the show in my life and in the years after, I watched til the very end of the G4 era. Candace Bailey was an awesome host as well don't get me wrong) Afterwards, whenever I have the time in my schedule I try to watch their show in the evenings (on TV and/or online) and even though I watched in the middle of their tenure, they made at least a small difference in my life, like I said indirectly. (Which partially explains the predominance of Kev & Liv in my Attack fan art) Looking back years later, my parents just wanted me to do my best and succeed in school and in life. In addition, I learned that I have a learning disability in which I often take a longer time of processing the information that was given to me in my various classes.

Throughout my high school career, I have to admit, I had faced depression for a variety of reasons (namely a lack of friends, barely having the chance to do social outings other than with my family, letting people down unintentionally among others) and attempted various methods of suicide in the process whenever I’m down. After each failed attempt, I try my best to think about the big picture. If I had offed myself during that time, I wouldn't be able to graduate from high school, wouldn’t have great job experience, not having the opportunity to meet some of the greatest people in my life and most importantly, my family’s lives would be different if I’m gone. Furthermore, I wouldn’t be able to continue to be a nerd/geek and follow excellent careers in TV, Movies, Comics, Gaming, Cosplay etc etc etc. I decided to tell my story of being a suicide attempt survivor after so many years because I hope to maybe inspire people that there’s always light at the end of a dark tunnel. Excuse the cliche but the saying is true. In addition, regardless of whether or not it is from TV/Film, Comics, Video games etc entertainment can (and will at least in my case) save a person at least indirectly from depression/suicide. A lot of people including your friends, families, neighbors, classmates, teachers among others care about you and love you. And there's only one you in existence and you're unique for the role.

For my family, teachers past/present & (some of my) friends, once again, thank you for being there for me in my life and helping me to be a better man in life. As for my friends on social media and whatnot, thanks for putting up with me in spite of us not meeting up in person (yet). Enjoyed chatting with ya guys and making my day in the process.

As for Kevin Pereira & Olivia Munn, I know you probably won't read this if you do, I wanna let you know how thankful and grateful I am for making at least a small difference in my life. As I've said before (and I'll continue to say) you guys have excellent careers in TV/ the internet & in movies respectively and for being Kevin Pereira & Olivia Munn. The both of you helped pave the way for new nerdy/geeky personalities on the internet, TV, and/or film. If it wasn't for Attack of the Show, my life would be different and once again, thanks for the laughs and entertainment and likewise to the crew who helped made the show possible. As always, keep being you and keep having fun at what you do in your careers. And of course, Keep Smiling <3

P.S. One more thing before I forget, thank you Alex Corea, Evanne Friedmann, & Erin Steeby along with the rest of the Attack crew past/present for helping to continue the legacy. The personalities come and go over the years but the goal to make people's days more awesome continue. As I've said before and I'll say it again, I'm honored to be a part of the experience. Who knows, in the current generation maybe Alex & Evanne/Steebs would (indirectly) save a life whether its taped or live just like Kev & Liv did to mine.<3
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Submitted on
March 25, 2017


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