T
literature

Tanka Series

Daily Deviation
Laurence55's avatar
By Laurence55   |   Watch
95 105 3K (1 Today)
Published: November 4, 2007
1.

dry leaves-
I remember
the perfect spiral
of my worn
pigskin

2.

asking her out
by email
I proofread every word
then-
delete

3.

flipping
to the free space
in my journal-
but how can five lines
hold autumn dusk?

4.

sorority bake sale
the girl I dumped
last year
serves me
a cold brownie

5.

Thanksgiving-
above the
dinner prayer
the howl
of a stray dog

6.

fall carnival
the tarot woman's hand
warm
against my own

7.

even in the cool
of night air
the rose
climbing
her ankle
Recommended Literature
f
for to fall on your deaf ears
You glisten in my throat, baby,        and glow across my pores -    but for our love to be         effective, you've gotta start shimmering, too.   You, though, will remain dull and we will                 be like either side of          a glazed vase - sparkling Side A                                vs. cold, unfinished clay.   I had been content to play Dagny Taggart                       to your Hank Reardon,        or Hades, on fire with patience                        to have my time with                                  the Persephone in you.             But now I'm out of analogies,       cyclically suffer
S
Snow
Months grouped together like careless footsteps stroll upon the lashings accorded to me by the sun. In January I am caressed by ghosts or something as cold and invisible. They intrude upon hair, clothes; books dampen with monstrous hand prints.    Are these shells of half-dead creatures    holding themselves, ancient in a cavern somewhere    or tethered to the earth by thought? Bits of cloud, the flesh of heaven picked off like a soft disease nestle on my shoulder as if pulled from my sweater. they emerge quietly like droplets of blood. Whisper:          we are the teeth of ancient things. White drift presses upon the house
V
Vagrant Hearts
Ah... the reflection in your eyes Play across your skin As your shivering hand reaches out... Love fades into the sky Another broken window Another strip of film But every night I still see you there Lying in the tide Foam rolling silently up legs bare Are you wishing it pulls you away...? Now you become the silken sand Now you are the waves tenderly drowning Under my stars, forever Bated breaths into our fire we feed Singeing flesh, sinking deep Vagrant hearts Wandering through ashen night Sweat glistened memories Or desires that one day might... Possessed of us, behind closed doors I'll be under your thoughts, forever T
© 2007 - 2019 Laurence55
This is just a short series of some my Tanka style poetry. I will be adding one piece daily for a final total of seven. Enjoy :D By the way, this is not a sequence, just individual works.
Recommended Literature
f
for to fall on your deaf ears
You glisten in my throat, baby,        and glow across my pores -    but for our love to be         effective, you've gotta start shimmering, too.   You, though, will remain dull and we will                 be like either side of          a glazed vase - sparkling Side A                                vs. cold, unfinished clay.   I had been content to play Dagny Taggart                       to your Hank Reardon,        or Hades, on fire with patience                        to have my time with                                  the Persephone in you.             But now I'm out of analogies,       cyclically suffer
S
Snow
Months grouped together like careless footsteps stroll upon the lashings accorded to me by the sun. In January I am caressed by ghosts or something as cold and invisible. They intrude upon hair, clothes; books dampen with monstrous hand prints.    Are these shells of half-dead creatures    holding themselves, ancient in a cavern somewhere    or tethered to the earth by thought? Bits of cloud, the flesh of heaven picked off like a soft disease nestle on my shoulder as if pulled from my sweater. they emerge quietly like droplets of blood. Whisper:          we are the teeth of ancient things. White drift presses upon the house
V
Vagrant Hearts
Ah... the reflection in your eyes Play across your skin As your shivering hand reaches out... Love fades into the sky Another broken window Another strip of film But every night I still see you there Lying in the tide Foam rolling silently up legs bare Are you wishing it pulls you away...? Now you become the silken sand Now you are the waves tenderly drowning Under my stars, forever Bated breaths into our fire we feed Singeing flesh, sinking deep Vagrant hearts Wandering through ashen night Sweat glistened memories Or desires that one day might... Possessed of us, behind closed doors I'll be under your thoughts, forever T
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Comments (97)
Soldierandrew123's avatar
Wait ... Isn't Tanka poem should be like 5/7/5/7/7...
I don't really want to point at every problem like for example for the first one it is just 2/4/5/3/2... It is still good but idk...
Reply  ·  
Laurence55's avatar
Please research contemporary tanka before making such comments on my work. There are many journals online as well as essays. Thank you.
Reply  ·  
Soldierandrew123's avatar
Well sorry but I was just confuse on why is the poem is different than the one I usually read
Just showing an example on a website that may explain
www.edu.pe.ca/stjean/playing%2…
Reply  ·  
Laurence55's avatar
That is understandable, but you really should study before making assumptions. There are several excellent haikai journals online. I would be happy to point you to a few.
Reply  ·  
HaikuKitty's avatar
HaikuKitty|Hobbyist Writer
Did you know....

searching,
I type in "tanka"
and here is this piece,
most popular of all time! :heart:
Reply  ·  
Laurence55's avatar
:blushes: Thanks Loretta! Its been a long time since I've looked at this set :heart:
Reply  ·  
orgnyzdk-os's avatar
nice work
please do check out mine
Reply  ·  
Laurence55's avatar
Thank you! I certainly will!
Reply  ·  
SOLARTS's avatar
Wow -

just re-reading these - what an amazing set!!!

#3 makes me jealous even - I wish I had of written it!!!

:)
Reply  ·  
Laurence55's avatar
Ah, thanks man! Yeah, lately I have been reading over some of my favorite poets in other styles, such as abstract. I may post a few longer works, but I am definitely a short form poet at heart. :D
Reply  ·  
SOLARTS's avatar
I find longer works really hard to connect with these days - usually because they have an intent I don't enjoy. mostly they are too concerned with expressing themselves, and forget that a good writer must forget themselves in the poem... poets I find have real trouble remembering that people will read the poem.

I do like Bukowski and William Carlos Williams though, so maybe there is some hope for the longer form.

Long live the short form!!!

;)
Reply  ·  
Laurence55's avatar
Yeah, I have some that I enjoy greatly! I may type some up and send them to you. I'm nervous man...Friday is my black belt test...
Reply  ·  
ocean--floor's avatar
I know you said these are not a sequence, but they do fit together so well. They flow together like memories, in a way. I think #3 is my favorite, but overall this is an incredible piece.
Reply  ·  
Laurence55's avatar
Thank you, I appreciate that!! :D Yes, tanka (in my opinion) should maintain fluidity and overt emphasis of emotion! :nod:
Reply  ·  
ocean--floor's avatar
you're very welcome. :)
Reply  ·  
sukkiGoh's avatar
sukkiGoh|Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks ~:star:
Reply  ·  
Laurence55's avatar
you're welcome!
Reply  ·  
SOLARTS's avatar
#4 is excellent also!!!

a great person/al-image (rather than natural-image, not that I support an absolute distinction between them). we feel that in one kind of poem there is a person attempting to understand nature, and in the other, a person tries to understand a person (here, the ex-girlfriend).

wonderful image.
Reply  ·  
Laurence55's avatar
Cool, thanks!!! I love the way you have analyzed this!!
Reply  ·  
Keraness's avatar
Congrats on the DD! :party:
Reply  ·  
Laurence55's avatar
Thanks Kera!! :D
Reply  ·  
DNAngela's avatar
I can see the scenes melting into the next...
Seems like some kind of emotive jock's story..

I wanna look into "tanka," but it's like haiku, right?
Reply  ·  
Laurence55's avatar
Tanka is actually a style that predates haiku...it usually consiss of five lines, and is (in my opinion) a little more fluid than haiku. i post educational journals about the various eastern styles. Feel free to go to my page and browse my previous journals...try out the style!! Its great :D
Reply  ·  
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