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I'm more than half Native American, Blackfoot mostly with some Cherokee mixed in; I'm also German. I have twenty tattoo's, three of which are around my neck, I have fourteen piercings, two of them are hidden by bra and underwear. I have lived the life of a wife with three small children, I have also lived the life of a single mother of three. I have had many lovers, of both sex and even a tranny, I have experience in most all sexual situations. I have had the misfortune to know what it is like to have my children taken from me and placed in foster care (very bleak time in my life) Because of losing my children I've become a recovering addict with still borderline alcoholism. I have a DUI and a drug charge on my record. I served a few months in jail and the one thing I think I may have expertise on is the fact that I shot a guy in 2009, in the crotch area (I put the bullet through the original hole) with a 9mm Kaltek Hollow Point. He was trying to rape my then 7year old daughter. I can still remember that day very clearly and can even describe the smell of the gun going off, the splatter of the blood.
Literature
Fading Reflection
Staring out my window, through the glass into the night
While the world is staring back like it’s reading me in light
Every flicker, every figure, every face that passes by
Feels like they can trace the secrets swimming in my mind
Tracing every reflection, every question I repeat
Am I more than what I’m showing… or just what they believe?
Do they see a little girl, heart brittle, hands shaking?
Or a woman built from every single chance she’s taken?
Written in the stardust, scattered through the dark…
Am I just the shadow… or am I the spark?
Mirror, mirror, let me see
What the world reflects of me
Do you see my innocence or a hidden sin?
Do you see the war I fight underneath my skin?
Am I light, am I dark, am I both in between?
Am I everything you want… or just a fading dream?
Tell me what you see when you look my way…
Is it love… or something that will fade?
Back inside the shadows where the silence starts to speak
Every thought’s a wave and it keeps crashing over me
Every version,
Literature
Sneak peak of: Between the static and the Stars
Iris had always been drawn to silence.
Not the peaceful kind — not the soft hush before snowfall or the warm quiet of an early morning — but a strange, heavy silence she carried with her like a second heartbeat. As a kid, she thought everyone heard it: a faint hum behind the world, like a television left on in an empty room.
But Iris learned fast that no one else did.
Her parents brushed it off as imagination. Her teachers said she daydreamed too much. But the Static… it didn’t care who believed in it. It stayed with her, crackling at the edges of her senses, whispering like wind sliding through broken wires.
She didn’t know then that the Static had a name.
And a purpose.
And a history drenched in nightmares.
Literature
The Flicker
In the quiet corners of the mind,
shadows stretch, intertwining,
like vines wrapping around hope.
A heavy fog settles in,
each breath a weight,
each step a question,
where does the path lead,
when the sun seems to forget its warmth?
Days bleed into nights,
colors fade,
the world outside bustling,
but I am still,
a solitary figure lost in a maze,
where whispers of laughter echo,
but reach not my ears,
where smiles are worn like masks,
but I can't find one that fits.
I gather fallen stars,
traces of light,
that flicker and flicker,
but dim with the passing time.
I walk through forests of memory,
finding solace in the silence,
the heartache becomes a companion,
familiar, haunting, shared.
Yet, in this darkness,
a flicker remains,
a fragile spark that trembles,
like a child's first breath,
whispering that dawn can break,
that the path can twist,
leading to a clearing,
where shadows dance with light,
and the journey, though painful,
holds the promise of renewal.
So, I tread
Featured in Groups
Wife, Single Mother, Addict, Alcoholic, Jail Bird, Wanton Woman, Shooter....
© 2014 - 2026 ladyshadowrage
Comments7
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I could use your guidance towards the Alcoholism. One of my characters is currently going through it (or rather in the stages of developing it though I've not gotten all the way there yet and thus am only in the planning phase) though as they don't drive it's not like a DUI (or crash due to such) is going to show them that they need to get better. (Sorry I don't know my words right now D: )
Basically I would like your guidance on:
1. Treatment? I currently don't know anyone IRL in which to ask unfortunately and I am not sure where to begin.
2. When does it begin to officially count as alcoholism? Does it blur into the sober half?
3. Common symptoms/maybe less common symptoms/what you currently experienced.
4. Cliches/offensive stuff to avoid.
(PS. Sorry if I've said anything offensive here it's not my intention! I'd just like to know more as I would like to accurately portray what I'm planning)
Basically I would like your guidance on:
1. Treatment? I currently don't know anyone IRL in which to ask unfortunately and I am not sure where to begin.
2. When does it begin to officially count as alcoholism? Does it blur into the sober half?
3. Common symptoms/maybe less common symptoms/what you currently experienced.
4. Cliches/offensive stuff to avoid.
(PS. Sorry if I've said anything offensive here it's not my intention! I'd just like to know more as I would like to accurately portray what I'm planning)