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This is the first half of a Gothic Horror story I am writing. I actually do have a title for it, but I am being mysterious and holding off on revealing that until I finish the piece. Bwahaha.
I am a little miffed that DA doesn't handle runes very well, so the pictures I added are like 100 times bigger than the actual runes are in the text. Ah well, such is life.
Anyway, I don't often (ever) write straight relationships, so I decided to step out of my sapphic comfort zone and do a few things differently in this piece. Also, though I kind of feel like I am being as subtle as a brick through a window, if it isn't obvious, there are Trans* characters in the story (and it's not even about their trans*ness. Shocking!)
So, I hope you enjoy
I am a little miffed that DA doesn't handle runes very well, so the pictures I added are like 100 times bigger than the actual runes are in the text. Ah well, such is life.
Anyway, I don't often (ever) write straight relationships, so I decided to step out of my sapphic comfort zone and do a few things differently in this piece. Also, though I kind of feel like I am being as subtle as a brick through a window, if it isn't obvious, there are Trans* characters in the story (and it's not even about their trans*ness. Shocking!)
So, I hope you enjoy
© 2014 - 2024 Kythkyn
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Overall Vision
Originality Technique ImpactYou had me instantly hooked! I loved reading it and I'm very much looking forward to reading more of your works! I can't wait until you finish the second half.
Overall, I have to say you did very well in the writing itself. Your grammar is fairly good, but there are a couple of small things that stand out to me, such as your use of 'olde' as opposed to 'old.' Although it manages to fit with the imagery you craft in the story, it's still somewhat unusual and it was enough to pull me back from the story a few times.
You have a lot of foreshadowing (or at least what feels like foreshadowing) that really leaves me wanting more. I'm curious, what were the pills that Sierra needed in the beginning? Do their former neighbors have anything to do with what's happening now? These are all questions that are just begging to be answered. I'm definitely going to keep my eyes open for the second part.