Have you ever felt so in to someone that the very presence of them around you can make you forget all your problems? That by just the sound of their voice they can mesmerize you? That you can lose yourself in their eyes every time? That their touch can make you feel the most amazing sensations? That the thought of them makes you want to better yourself and grow into the kind of person they could love?
Have you ever wanted someone so badly that you always imagine the two of you in various circumstances and doing various activities? Like going for walks in the park or taking pictures, laughing together, going to the movies and holding hands? Like helping each other in each other's work, making everything sound easy and making up new games? Like painting the town red going from club to club or from bar to bar? Like imagining how you would make love to them for hours and how it would feel waking up next to them the following morning?
Have you ever felt all that? You must have at least once. It's that feeling that gives you butterflies in your stomach, that makes you blush when you see them, that arouses you at every physical touch.
You can call it madness. You can call it innocence or naivety. You can blame it on pheromones or chemistry. You can call it whatever you wish but the feeling remains the same.
It isn't love. Love requires more from us to exist. It is infatuation. It is attraction. It is a burning desire. It is your body compelling you to be closer to him or her. It is a chemical reaction, reminiscent of our primal selves, filling our brain with endorphins and dopamine (the pleasure hormone and, respectively, the addiction).
And the feeling of infatuation does not disappear when you are away from the object of your infatuation. You feel the need for the drug again. You feel the need to be with them again.
Then you're with them, unable to contain your desire, your lust for them. Your hands begin to touch, discovering each other's bodies and what areas are more arousing than others, stirring up each other's passion. Your lips begin to kiss, fingernails digging into flesh, breaths mingle together frantically and you want more and more and more
This is the most dangerous. Infatuation is very dangerous through one simple fact: it is an excessive need. Of course, living in the moment and doing only what you have wanted for days, weeks or more is not wrong
but you must learn to control it. In the haze caused by their pheromones and your own brain squirting out hormones, you can overlook vital pieces of information that may spell your own doom. You may forget that the one you are attracted to is a complex person just like you with dreams, fears, joys and sorrows.
If you are feeling that right now, I only have one piece of advice for you: stop and think for a bit first.
Why? Because infatuation and first impressions are one thing
but compatibility, understanding and trust are a completely different problem.
Listening to: Brad Paisley & Alison Krauss - Whiskey Lullaby
Watching: Lie to Me