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About Varied / Hobbyist Kyle MathesonMale/United States Recent Activity
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Literature
Anxiety
It's different for everyone.
To some, it's an itch
Just under the skin.
Others, a jittery, restless energy,
An inability to stay still
Others yet say it's like the walls.
Closing in around them,
The ceiling pressing down from above.
And then there's the
   fear
Irrational
Illogical
Unpredictable
Unprovoked
Unexpected
The true
   terror
That seeps into your bones
Makes you freeze
Like a caged animal
   staring down the barrel of death
You can hear your heart stop
   then start
Blood racing through your veins
But you still stay,
Unable to move,
Unable to halt the
Thunderous beat of your pulse,
   like a stampede,
Thoughts running through your mind,
   quick as lightning,
And just as unstoppable.
It ripples across your skin,
   like electricity,
Washes over you
   like a tidal wave,
Pulls you under,
Tears you from reality
   like a riptide
Unrepentant
Unforgiving
Unrelenting
Ines
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California Sunset 1 by KyMatheson California Sunset 1 :iconkymatheson:KyMatheson 3 0
Literature
The Cloud is Your Friend
There's always
  a cloud
Sometimes more
Sometimes rain
Sometimes it's all you see
  that endless gray
Sometimes it's black
Sometimes lighter
  and barely visible
And it's always there
Following
Clinging
A shadow that never
  disappears
But when the sun breaks through,
It's amazing
It's gorgeous
Even when it's
  too much
Blinding, burning, overwhelming,
It's still
  so beautiful
You can't take it.
You can't have it.
You shouldn't feel it.
After everything,
You're just going to be
  happy?
And the cloud comes in closer,
It grows dark again,
Blocking it,
Choking it,
Shutting it out,
Keeping it from sight.
You can't be happy,
  it reminds you.
You don't deserve that
  it hisses
It would die. You would poison it.
And
  you can't argue with it
  because you know it's right
So you hide
Underneath the cloud,
Pull yourself into it's shadow,
Curl up in the rain,
Your best friend,
Safe
F
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Literature
Untitled
Motivation
A drive fueled by the desire to achieve something.
But achievement is
 so much
 work
It's not being lazy
It's not slacking off
It's not
It's not
It's not

It's
 not having the energy,
 not being able to
Get up
Get ready
Get going
Get things done
Get
 out of bed
 dressed
 move
 anything
It's not even enough to
   end
And all you can do is
 breathe
   and
 nothing else
It's
 a lot of things
It's
 a lack of things
It's
 no motivation
   to do
     anything
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Clouds on a Sunny Day by KyMatheson Clouds on a Sunny Day :iconkymatheson:KyMatheson 2 0
Literature
Nothing
You are
Nothing
No one
Nowhere
At all
A
 Void
Waiting to be filled?
Waiting to be found?
Waiting for meaning?
What
 Has meaning?
Life?
Death?
They are nothing to you
Nothing important
At all
 Like you
They are ideas
Abstract
Intangible
Nothing at all
Like you
Your existence
 Is not
You can't be waiting
Nothingness cannot
 Wait
For something
You are
 Nothing
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Inktober 2018, Day 23: Muddy by KyMatheson Inktober 2018, Day 23: Muddy :iconkymatheson:KyMatheson 2 0
Literature
Yellow
The color of
Being happy
They say
Shining equal to
The sun
After a lifetime of
 Gray
A soft joy
A carefree jubilance
A smile on a friendly face
A light of
Hope
It's
Overwhelming
Too much
Too bright
That endless
Yellow
(bring back the gray)
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Literature
Gray
The darkness
 consumes.
It doesn't turn everything black,
Doesn't make you blind.
Colors fade, desaturating until
It's all grays.
Gray holds no joy,
Not when everything,
Everyone,
Everywhere,
Is made of gray.
Even the old colors,
The ones that you've always seen,
The colors you know,
They're gray,
 Too.
And you're empty,
An unfinished
Something,
Left abandoned,
Unwanted,
Devoid of anything but
 Gray.
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Crown of Light by KyMatheson Crown of Light :iconkymatheson:KyMatheson 1 0
Literature
Roses - a Valentine's Day poem
Red are the roses
We give to our loves,
But they come in more colors
Than just the one above
A white one so pure,
Like that of a dress
One might bring to her wedding
Where she says "I do, yes"
Pink of both light
And its darker hues
Can mean sympathy, admiration,
And even "thank you"
Yellow roses,
Bold and bright as the sun,
Are to be given to friends,
Those most cherished ones
There are so many more:
Purple, blue, black, even green,
And with so many colors,
There's even more to mean
So you see, roses are varied,
And like the people we know,
All become differently beautiful,
The more that they grow
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:iconkymatheson:KyMatheson 0 0
Inktober 2018, Day 1: Poisonous by KyMatheson Inktober 2018, Day 1: Poisonous :iconkymatheson:KyMatheson 0 0 Meteor - Watercolor by KyMatheson Meteor - Watercolor :iconkymatheson:KyMatheson 0 0 Wave (remake) - Acrylic and/or Oil by KyMatheson Wave (remake) - Acrylic and/or Oil :iconkymatheson:KyMatheson 0 0 Wave - Watercolor by KyMatheson Wave - Watercolor :iconkymatheson:KyMatheson 2 2 because Y.O.U. M.A.T.T.E.R. T.O. M.E. by KyMatheson because Y.O.U. M.A.T.T.E.R. T.O. M.E. :iconkymatheson:KyMatheson 1 0

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Activity


It's different for everyone.

To some, it's an itch
Just under the skin.
Others, a jittery, restless energy,
An inability to stay still
Others yet say it's like the walls.
Closing in around them,
The ceiling pressing down from above.

And then there's the
   fear

Irrational
Illogical
Unpredictable
Unprovoked
Unexpected


The true
   terror
That seeps into your bones
Makes you freeze
Like a caged animal
   staring down the barrel of death

You can hear your heart stop
   then start
Blood racing through your veins
But you still stay,
Unable to move,
Unable to halt the
Thunderous beat of your pulse,
   like a stampede,
Thoughts running through your mind,
   quick as lightning,
And just as unstoppable.

It ripples across your skin,
   like electricity,
Washes over you
   like a tidal wave,
Pulls you under,
Tears you from reality
   like a riptide
Unrepentant
Unforgiving
Unrelenting
Inescapable


And then —

   a breath

   (sometimes more)


And you're back
Like
   nothing happened
     at all



It sticks with you, though,
Like a cough leftover from a cold,
Shivers down your spine
   just remembering
Hoping that it doesn't come back,
That you never feel it again.



But it whispers against the back of your mind:



   I never left.
California Sunset 1
A sunset viewed from the San Francisco Bay Area.

Photograph taken by me.
Please do not repost or use without permission beforehand.
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There's always
  a cloud
Sometimes more
Sometimes rain
Sometimes it's all you see
  that endless gray
Sometimes it's black
Sometimes lighter
  and barely visible
And it's always there
Following
Clinging
A shadow that never
  disappears

But when the sun breaks through,
It's amazing
It's gorgeous
Even when it's
  too much
Blinding, burning, overwhelming,
It's still
  so beautiful

You can't take it.
You can't have it.
You shouldn't feel it.
After everything,
You're just going to be
  happy?

And the cloud comes in closer,
It grows dark again,
Blocking it,
Choking it,
Shutting it out,
Keeping it from sight.
You can't be happy,
  it reminds you.
You don't deserve that
  it hisses
It would die. You would poison it.


And

  you can't argue with it

  because you know it's right


So you hide
Underneath the cloud,
Pull yourself into it's shadow,
Curl up in the rain,
Your best friend,
Safe
From the
    happiness
Motivation
A drive fueled by the desire to achieve something.

But achievement is
 so much
 work

It's not being lazy
It's not slacking off
It's not
It's not
It's not


It's
 not having the energy,
 not being able to
Get up
Get ready
Get going
Get things done
Get
 out of bed
 dressed
 move
 anything

It's not even enough to
   end

And all you can do is
 breathe
   and
 nothing else

It's
 a lot of things
It's
 a lack of things
It's
 no motivation
   to do

     anything

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KyMatheson
Kyle Matheson
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
United States
I've actually been here since 2007, but made a new account for my new self. I hope to be moving my older works to this account eventually, (and leaving my old accounts empty for personal safety reasons), but I don't know how long that will take.
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:iconbefore-october:
Before-October Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2018  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you for the fave and the watch! I love your poems! :3
Reply
:iconkymatheson:
KyMatheson Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2018  Hobbyist General Artist
It's no problem at all; you're really good! And thank you very much! I don't often get inspiration for poetry, but they're always a great way to vent about injustices in the world, and it makes me feel better once I've written them down.
Have a great day, and remember: stay awesome!~ ★
Reply
:iconbefore-october:
Before-October Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2018  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you so much! And yeah I know what you mean. I am horrid at peotry yet I still write some to unbottle my feelings. I use drawing the same way sometimes.
Reply