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I just called to say I love you.
Well, despite a major setback in my life and colossal disappointment last week, I think I've licked my wounds enough to pick myself up and keep moving. At the very least, I have to try something, since what I'm doing in life right now isn't working for me. I'm still really upset about essentially not getting my way of things, and yes, I feel like a spoiled child for it, and to counter that, I'm going to stop moping about it and do something. I needed some time to heal at least enough to function, and I think I'm at that point... now, we're moving on.
I've decided I'm probably going to go back to school in Spring 2019 to finish up my degree, and if my calculations are correct, I've saved up enough money in order to support myself while I do it and not work as many hours. I want to go back because it's a matter that I want to say I did it, and plus, I really am pretty dang smart, but the trouble I have with that is that I can't prove it on paper. I want that piece of paper; it lends my intelligence some degree (pardon the pun) of legitimacy. Yes, it'll help me further my career, I know, but the really big pull for me to do this is that I want my degree that says I stuck it out for X number of years and learned something. I'm pretty nervous, but I picked up a course booklet and am looking through stuff I may need, so I have some idea what to say to the career counselor when I schedule a meeting with one.
Trying to look on the bright side, though it feels like I need to create a bright side in this case, as one doesn't seemingly exist. Oh, well... I know how to do that. It's a pain in my asses, (all of 'em), but I CAN do it.
Been working on a better diet and more exercise in my life for a few weeks now and it's paid off exponentially. A coworker took notice of it a few days ago and exclaimed how great I looked -- my ego ate itself over that. While I'm in a low point in life, I have to say, I really feel a lot more comfortable in my own body, for whatever that means. I don't feel so lethargic, is probably a more apt way to explain it. Part of it was a recent medication adjustment/addition, I think, but I'm really glad I stuck to this deal of trimming down. Yeah, I hit a trough in life, but I could feel a whole lot worse, assuming I hadn't made the lifestyle changes I have as of late. Things are hard right now, but not impossible, and at least I have a method of coping with it in my walks throughout my neighborhood to clear my mind.
Nothing much of interest going on at the moment. Just trudging though, trying to figure out my new, adjusted future plans and where the pieces fit.
Hope life is treating you well.
God love you like I do,