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About Literature / Artist half of whatever you areFemale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 11 Years
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of hands and pants
my hands will always be open
you know you can always hold them
except those times
when i shove them
into the pockets
of these too-tight jeans
that i only bought for you
and those times
when they're holding my coffee
only needed
because of my fear
of falling asleep
and dreaming of you
and, of course
when they're adjusting the volume
on the headphones
that i thought you'd liek
that i sort of bought
to drown you out
and the rest of the time
when i clasp them together
for hope
of it feeling like you.
i guess now
my hands are off limits
sorry, there's no room for you.
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 1 1
slowly, i'm easing myself over you.
i'll always still wish
what we had was still there
but really.
why aim for something  that you'll never have again?
why hate yourself when you could stop it?
you're not worth it
you're perfect
but not for me.
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 2 1
as if you're anything alone
you don't realize how much you need me
i'll forgive these fake smiles
if you notice how far they go
eyebrows raised, as if to say
"i'm better than you."
which i'm sure you believe
i'm sure you also think
you could live without me.
i'd like to see you try.
tell me, who would you go to?
who else would you call?
who else would lie and tell you you're someone?
face it, you can't manage
without someone like me
guiding you, sculpting you
letting you be yourself
but even when you are
you're just little bits of others
you say i'm nothing without you
you're nothing without me
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 2 3
more cliche poetry
you are the essence
of all of my clichéd poetry
your beautiful and stupid insights
could never mean more
why is it
that we never love what's best
we always want so much more
so we go for what's worst
so now i know
that you'll never let me heal
and your perfect and vapid smile
will never shine on me
i'll never never understand
why you can't let someone go
i know i'm finally over us
but i can't get over you
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 1 1
noticing the cutouts
shove me down
and maybe i'll knock down the walls
those cardboard cutouts, standardized
because when you're like me
you notice the flaws
and you notice the way
nothing fits together quite right
and you notice that you're the only one
who can knock the walls down
because nobody notices they're fake
and maybe if i shove harder
someone else will notice
and do the same
and maybe if i shove harder still
we'll all notice the cracks
and everything will fall
and if i give it my life
you'll notice that they're fake
all but me
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 1 4
What happened?
When I get mad at someone, I just cry.  
                                                                                  There's nothing wrong with crying.
I'm overweight.
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 2 0
losing me
that way you stare
and that way you smile
like you know everything
but you don't know
how i still need to see you
and feel you next to me
and hear you breathe
and lose myself
and forget who i was
and accidentally abandon
any part of me
that you would ever accept
but i guess
that means you care enough
to notice
so i guess that's alright
but not really
since you're the only reason
i ever disappeared.
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 2 0
who i am
i don't mean to be pushy
i don't mean to be cold
it's just sometimes
around you
it feels justified
and it feels good
and i don't mind
and i hope you don't mind
because i can't be this way anywhere else
and so with you
i lose my inhibitions
and whisper stupid things
but after
i feel like me
that girl who nobody really knows
the one who can't justify it
the one who can't feel good
who i am.
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 0 3
grasping your fingers
it makes me happy
but in a moment
or maybe just tonight
i might forget how “happy” feels
and fall back into this ditch
and let go of your hand
because it’s starting to hurt
and you’re squeezing to tight
and i don’t want to let go
but i have to
because when i’m with you
perspective disappears
and I forget
that you’re the reason
i never forgot
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 1 4
one girl circus
Come over here
So I can see your eyes
The ones that freeze to ice
And hurt me every time
Right this way
See the one girl show
The one consisting of nothing but tears
And constant screaming
Step right up
Don't let her go
A once in a lifetime opportunity
That you will obviously pass up.
Ladies and gents
Come see the main attraction
And hope the music
Won't drive you insane
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 1 1
nobody writes about me
i love the way she only smiles inside
with that twisted misperception of reality and lies
the way she grabs a hold of you
and manages to sculpt you too
the way she tries to separate
the ways that make her make mistakes
how every time she screws life up
she stares it in the face
the way she says she doesn't care
what anybody thinks
how desperately she wants approval
as she hides right on the brink
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 0 3
as she said goodbye
looking at her
as she said goodbye
i can't forget
the look in her eyes
sizing her up
did she think she was mine?
that i had just hurt her?
she had seemed to be fine.
glancing back
i still wonder why
she searched for my approval
as i tried not to cry
staring her down
she smiled right back
i told her i loved her
and it all went black.
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 1 0
Take What's Left
you once called her beautiful
now all that's left is what her shell could protect
that faction of inner beauty
that fraction of herself
the part of her deaf to your lies
what she held on to
what you left
you tried to build her up
she tried too hard and fell
are you enough for both of you
or must you take what's left?
she's not broken, just ravaged
trying to piece together
what you didn't destroy
you left her there and you were replaced
you could have been her world
but you couldn't bear her burdens
were you that surpised?
you didn't want more pain inside
so you left her there
so someone else could take what was left
you once said "i love you"
now all that's left is what can't be erased
that faction of peace
that fraction of your love
the part of you that nobody saw
please don't hold on to her
so i can take what's left
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 2 2
please don't look at me like that
it's just an echo of what we had
i don't want you to fake it
i don't want you to pretend
but i don't want to acknowledge
that we have come to an end
please don't love me in that way
because to me it's just not the same
i don't want to drift away
i don't want this to hurt you
but i'm just incapable of
continuing to hurt me too
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 0 2
Drawing A Blank
I’m drawing a blank
As to why you don’t care
Did I do something wrong?
Or was there just nothing there?
You can’t see
What I look like inside
But it’s you that I thought of
Every time that I cried
My body won’t let me
Feel any more pain
So the emotions I show
Are the ones that I feign
Because there is nothing
You didn’t destroy
My heart’s not a plaything
And it’s not a toy
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 3 5
one hundred word count
looking at the scars decorating my wrists
i wonder what i did to you
god knows, i didn't hurt you, dear
or not the way you hurt me, too.
every time you take a step
my mind can't take you in
and every time you break my heart
a razor breaks my skin.
i guess you'll never comprehend
because you never read my poems
at least not knowing they're for you
and my newfound shattered home.
i'd rather be an empty frame
than a photograph slashed through
i wish you had the decency
to know that it was you.
:iconkeepwishing:keepwishing 0 4

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Gothic Lolita Catherine by kawaiikitteny Gothic Lolita Catherine :iconkawaiikitteny:kawaiikitteny 101 18
Unsave Me
U n s a v e   m e
Steal away the softness from my eyes.
I want your fingerprints on my thighs,
The rainbows you leave there
When I taste your blood on my lips.
Cruel savior-
Make me beg.
Starve me-
Feed me the emptiness I crave,
Please- kiss me with your teeth.
Fill my head with your throat-sounds,
To chase away the void.
I cannot stand your gentle hands.
They stroke so tenderly,
And though I ache for you
To score with pointed fingertips
The smooth skin of my hips,
You do not.
Bruise away my bitter deeds
Like I long of you.
Tarnish me
Sweet prince,
Rid me of damned innocence,
Flay me with my longing
So hollow-
My raspy yes is barbed within my throat.
Red welts on ivory skin,
Black oceans of bliss
Your name, carved deep enough to scar.
These things I want-
For you to make me nothing,
Free me from myself,
Blind me so that I may see you,
Choke me so that I may breathe.
U n s a v e   m e.
:iconfragile-burn:fragile-burn 178 152
Losing You...
Why are you so different?
You're not who you used to be
And why am I so lonely,
When you're right infront of me?
Something isn't right,
I can see it in your eyes
I'm just trying to find
A truth behind the lies
You act like we're so close
But we couldn't be more far apart
And right now I can't handle
Someone playing with my heart
Tell me that I'm dreaming,
Tell me our love's still strong,
Tell me you're not leaving,
Please tell me that I'm wrong
Tell me that everything
Is going to be just fine
Tell me you love me
And you'll always be mine
Constantly, we're fighting
It gets worse everyday
And I don't want to stay
Just to watch you slip away
I only want to make you smile
But I only make you frown
I just want to make you happy
Seems all I do is bring you down
I've never felt so far away from you
And I need you here so bad
But I feel like we've already lost
Everything we ever had
Please tell me that I'm dreaming,
Tell me our love's still true,
Tell me you're not leaving,
I'd give up anythin
:iconash-interrupted:ash-interrupted 520 395
Make It Hurt
I don’t wanna be sad and lonely
I just wanna feel something honey
I don’t want the kind of love everyone walks on
I wanna be the moon to your earth
Wanna make you rise and fall
I don’t want puppy dogs and rainbows
I need something more than that.
Let me feel your body next to mine,
Just let me feel you in me
I’m begging you
Come on baby just
Make it hurt.
I wanna feel the blade
As it drags across my skin
The pain makes me feel like I’m alive
Feeling the cold steel
Dig into my wrists
This life has made me numb
So come on baby,
Just make it hurt
Don’t look down on me
For liking the pain
Don’t feel sad for me
Just for wanting something better than this
Don’t you fucking pity me
For feeling this way
I just want you to make it hurt
The pain makes me feel alive
Come on honey,
Make me feel alive
:iconultimaterockgoddess:ultimaterockgoddess 2 6
Jump by Hotaru-ai Jump :iconhotaru-ai:Hotaru-ai 10 8
Wait for me
I can't breathe anymore, but it feels like one of your kisses taking my breath away.
My body's starting to go numb, but it feels like the after glow of one of our nights together.
My vision's going dark, but it feels like the relief when I know you're alright.
                                           Wait for me...
:iconhotaru-ai:Hotaru-ai 2 7
humbert, lolita
lolita looks on with humbert mentality,
humbert, of course, with loli's brutality.
together, the two, they make such a pair,
pretend to be happy while passers-by stare,
hands intertwined, feign content for so long,
but alone, you see, it's gone terribly wrong.
:icondinacorn:dinacorn 16 16
red light district by dinacorn red light district :icondinacorn:dinacorn 5 6 bleck by dinacorn bleck :icondinacorn:dinacorn 2 6



half of whatever you are
Artist | Literature
United States
Current Residence: Small world, small state, small town
Favourite genre of music: Alternative
Operating System: Windows XP
MP3 player of choice: iPod
Favourite cartoon character: batman.
Personal Quote: Love's not all sunshine and rainbows. Unless you're gay. Then it's got some rainbows.


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Effamay Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2007
Thank you for faving! :D :rose:
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