BWAaaaah~ I dunno how much of a critique you're asking for here, so I'm just going to throw in here the same level of criticism my class and teacher throw at me to you oxo;;;;;;;;; please don't hate me~
downloaded the swf so I could study the frame by frame better o.O;;
I love the action that you're going for with Pookie's head shaking and arm waves. You've also did a nice job with keeping the line work smooth and clean.
My two main critiques are the popping frames and some anatomical proportions.
I think Pookie's arms could use just one or two more frames when they're coming up and as they go down, as they just seem to teleport from the initial pose of staying at the sides to suddenly being at the top and quickly down again. That maybe because of the lack of ease from the first pose of no movement going to the second pose. Pookie's face when she yells 'SENSE' has a much nicer flow (and oh man I love her face in that frame. So expressive)
Anatomical Proportions: The most prominent I saw was Pookie's forearms shortening rapidly as she bent them-they were proportionally at her waist at the start but were then went way above. Her left breast line is also making a tangent/connected to her bra strap at certain frames and then disconnects from it erratically at other times. There's a little bit of foreshortening issue with her right hand and I think it'd read easier drawn to the side as opposed to the front.
To me this a fun exercise that you've started out with on your own doing (something I ought to emulate as well), and I love the expressiveness of the poses and the details (seriously, manicured nails!? You are meticulous XD) and her expressions from frame to frame. All this really needs is more refining and it'll be fine.
Then of course, here's the more, nitpicky stuff that would, as my teacher calls it, make the animation 'more sexy':
-when Pookie's arms go to the top, don't just let it stop right on the get go. Give it more frames so it almost looks like there's a liiiitle drift of the hands going up, right before she lets loose with the SENSE and her arms drop right away.
-Breaking the motion: Both arms are going up at the same time, but it helps make the animation more alive when one arm actually goes up a frame or two Before the other one, and down as well. This prevent the 'twin-ing' or robotic effect. This can also be applied to the rest of her torso. When Pookie's bringing her shoulders and elbows down, keep her hands still close to the shoulder, then let it unfold:
So the order of the down motion is: Shoulders and elbows drop> forearm unfolds (hands just trailing, following the momentum)> forearms stop> hands overshoot a bit> as it snaps back up then goes into the spread out, open palm position.
-Smoothen the transitions: Her fingers when they go from spread out, to closed and spread out again are too rapid of a change per frame.
-More ease and overlay= more frames= more sexy.
If you need some clarifications over some things don't hesitate to ask/note me, and i'll be happy to reply.
Thank you very much to the people who've stuck around and the new faces who are interested in my stuff. I'm sure the world around us is causing apocalyptic levels of stress and anxieties right now so please be safe y'all and take care.
I agree with the *Demon-Lord-Dark that the coloring isn't bad at all. But to me, I think the biggest problem is that the body and background are following two different perspectives. I could tell because the flats of her feet are not parallel at all to the ground she's standing in, and the rest of her body is just drawn straight at us. Another problem is that the lack of overlapping between her torso and waist, and the right arm and leg, to help convey the message that she just got up and isn't fully awake yet. The shadows are a little confusing as well but it's a matter of defining where the light source is exactly.
If we were to follow the perspective of the bg, there needs to be a major overhaul of proportions and parts (eg, the feet, instead of being seen straight, would actually be seen from the top, showing the whole foot well), but if we were to follow the body instead, we'd simply lower the back wall and sidewall's vanishing point. I'll send you a pic to help clarify what I'm babbling about
I think Lucy's figure is fine. She's got the tone and built, but her waist (and girly lingerie) :teehee: do indicate her femininity. Of course it's a little tough to push that out when she's got that face and pose. Keep at it, straight shots are a pretty tricky thing to pull off but the important thing is you're pushing yourself trying all these different things 8D
Totally awesome. I'm seriously loving how grounded the whole pic looks like, 3 girls chilling and walking around a small commercial district. Clothes look great and the perspective too 8D I notice you follow the 7 head rule but proportionally-wise it's fine.
There's three things I want to point out: 1) the car: you did well on the illustration's 1 point perspective on everything but the car. Since a car usually drives parallel to the road, we should be seeing a bit of the back bumper of that vehicle. 2) Copic strokes: You still need practice coloring large areas with the markers, what some tutorials I've read suggest is really using the blending copic. Some people put the blending copic in first, others do it after each layer of color it's up to you. 3) Value: It's great to see the use of perspective to give depth to the setting, and the colors to make the girls stand out from the bg, but what would really strengthen the picture is a little bit more range with your light and shadows. It's fine to be lax in the background (since they're further from the viewer) but it'd make your characters stand out more and feel more in front. You probably could add 2 more layers of color in them to get some darker shades in, and or mix it up with cool colors.
It's been awhile since I've seen you made full illustrations with bg so I'm pretty glad to see this and I hope to see more in the future. 8D Keep on drawing!