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About Photography / Hobbyist Kayla24/Female/United States Recent Activity
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Distant Shore
I wish for it to rain softly
to feel droplets on my skin
as I sleep eternally under the sky
There is neither hope nor reason
to cross to that distant shore
"I will not give up."
I recall these words
yet continuing seems impossible
One step into the water
and pain devours me
I feel the erosion and decay
My vision blurs with tears
Another step forward
My life I do fear
The water grows deep
deeper and deeper
My life is submerged
I hold my breath
close my eyes
My breath doesn't hold
and my eyes grow curious
I open them both
There is a winged figure
His head hangs with shame
yet he reaches for my hand
His eyes are trusting
"Would you like to move on
or return from whence you came?"
Two choices
but my mind is set on one
The water rushes in
pressing me
pushing me
My lungs threaten
but I would not drown
I made my decision
I reach the surface
gasping and free
I gaze upon the shore
the kin I've wished to see
:iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 0 0
Nothing Interesting in Here
"Karen! Hurry up with those damn papers!"
His demands were heard loud and clear from down the hall. Karen slammed her coffee cup down in the midst of filling it.
"I am so tired of his shit."
She continued grumbling as she cleared up the spilt coffee. When her temper subsided enough to make a safe reappearance, she refilled her cup and exited the break room.
She took her time returning to her office, which is an insult; a tiny white-walled room with no windows and no room for decorations. It made her claustrophobic as hell. As she reached the door, she noticed a new addition. A bold, black sign with white text that read “Nothing Interesting in Here.”
Karen took a moment to sip her coffee. Her mind raced, trying to figure out who would pull such a petty prank. After a minute of hard-thinking, she came to a final conclusion.
She didn’t care.
Being careful not to spill the scalding cup in her hands, she continued down the hall toward her boss’ office. Karen knocked
:iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 0 0
There have been many moments in my life where I have chosen to be still and silent when something most certainly needed to be said, and those moments never really ended for me. They still replay in my head, over and over again, each with a different ending than the one that actually played out.
I'm haunted by the frustration of wishing that I had done something differently, wishing that I wasn't so afraid of the consequence. Of course there's nothing I can do to change that, nothing short of going back in time. Instead all I can do is take those memories and learn everything I can from them.
One thing I've learned is that there can never be enough time to think and everything held against you can be used as a driving force, especially if you can think outside of the box.
:iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 0 0
The Day They Left High School
He hadn't seen her since the day they left high school. The day of graduation came and went. His entire class showed up in green robes and tasseled green hats. There were tears in the girls' eyes, now fully fledged women. The boys were especially rambunctious. He didn't doubt they were trying to cover up their fear of the future. He was afraid too.
But she never showed up.
It was several weeks after that and he still hadn't heard from her. It was like she had completely erased herself from everyone's lives and he felt like he was the only one that noticed.
He sighed as laughter interrupted his thoughts.
"What's up with you, Skylar?"
His friend Jesse slugged him in the shoulder. His girlfriends started giggling with their ignorant star-struck eyes. "You're not getting lame on me, are you?"
Skylar watched as Jesse retracted his arm and wrapped it around the fourteen year old girl hooked to his waist while the other girl watched longingly from across the picnic table.
:iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 0 2
Grimm Head by KairiaShade Grimm Head :iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 0 0 Give me your food, human. by KairiaShade Give me your food, human. :iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 1 1 Nap Cuddles v2 by KairiaShade Nap Cuddles v2 :iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 0 0 Nap Cuddles by KairiaShade Nap Cuddles :iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 1 0 Damn that Grimm. by KairiaShade Damn that Grimm. :iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 1 0 Lazy Cat by KairiaShade Lazy Cat :iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 1 0 Window Napping v2 by KairiaShade Window Napping v2 :iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 1 0 Window Napping by KairiaShade Window Napping :iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 0 0 On Top of the World v2 by KairiaShade On Top of the World v2 :iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 0 0 On Top of the World by KairiaShade On Top of the World :iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 0 0 Playset Napping v2 by KairiaShade Playset Napping v2 :iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 0 0 Playset Napping by KairiaShade Playset Napping :iconkairiashade:KairiaShade 4 0

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I'm Sorry
I finally realized that my traumatic past has been catching up to me. My unresolved fears and pain of abandonment as a child by my parents has seeped into my adult life. It triggers extreme reactions in me that drives people close to me away.
I like to pretend to be strong. That whatever comes at me in life, I'll just pull myself up again and get over it. I'd like to believe that what doesn't kill me makes me stronger. I'd like to pretend that if I somehow draw out pain, and put it on canvas, that the pain will be contained on canvas, and not deep inside me. But that's not true.
When I'm knocked down and broken, and left to pick up the pieces of myself, I lose a bit more of myself each time. Not everything can be glued back together again. And never stronger than before. I can't trust again. I'm afraid of people. I'm afraid of being close to anyone.
It's hard to get up each morning. I feel hopeless and helpless. It doesn't matter that everyone tells me otherwise. I don't feel that
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Artist | Hobbyist | Photography
United States
I am now in a new place, a new state, a new state of mind. I am getting older, and wiser, and more experienced with every passing day.



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Eligius57 Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Hey! Thanks a lot for the :+fav: and the :+devwatch:!
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2017  Professional Writer
Hi there,

Thanks for watching me. I hope you'll always come by to enjoy my poetry ^^

Also I do a ton of stuff on YouTube, so you can always swing by and enjoy some of that too :'D

- Chennie
yuuike Featured By Owner Aug 15, 2017  Student Digital Artist
Ahhhh thank you so much for the watch!:iconmuahplz: I really appreciate it <333

If you like my art feel free to check me out on InstagramTwitterTumblr, or YouTube :iconasdfghbeeplz: //shamelessly advertises LOL
kit-kit-kit Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2017   Digital Artist
Thanks for the watch!
Pajunen Featured By Owner May 16, 2017
Thank you for the Watch!
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