“So, Abby? How’s the new controls feeling?” LabRat asked, smirking proudly as if he already knew the answer.
Abby looked down at LabRat on the little computer screen by the console. She had a genuine smile on her lips. “It’s amazing LabRat. I take back everything I said about boys and their toys. It’s both faster and more agile than the old GRS. And it functions just as well in the air as underground.”
The GRS-2 traveled thru the subway tunnel. Its headlights shinning the path ahead. Abby sat in the driver seat. Next to her was Naomi, riding shotgun. The younger girl seemed pretty tense but Abby figured it was just natural for a new recruit on her first mission. Abby looked over her shoulder to where Chester was sitting. “You holding up back there, Chester?”
“No, I’m not used to these kind of g-forces.” Chester whined, clutching his stomach.
“You survived a falling satellite. Pull yourself together, you sissy.” Abby teased.
“Guys? Is that it?” Naomi pointed straight ahead.
Abby saw it too and decelerated the GRS-2 to a gentle stop. “Yep, that’s a giant colon all right.”
The colon was right in front of them. It was pink and white. Bodily fluids leaked out of its walls as it pulsated and growing in length. It was as wide as the tunnel itself.
“It looks just like the one we saw in school a couple of years ago.” Abby said.
“Why is it pulsating like that?” Chester asked, raising a disturbed eyebrow. “Is it about to um…defecate?”
“I…don’t think so.” Abby replied. “It think it’s because it’s still growing?”
“Growing?” Chester asked puzzled.
The image of LabRat on screen was replaced with a map of the tunnel. Part of it was colored red to show were the colon was supposed to be. “If you’ve already reached the colon then it has grown exponentially since anyone reported on it.”
“It’s already more than twice the size of the one he tried to grow in our school.” Abby let out a sigh as she stretched herself over the seat. “I hate it whenever villains tries to outdo themselves. I wish they would just give up and try to do something else.”
“We’re gonna have to drive right into that thing, don’t we?” Naomi reluctantly asked.
Abby took a hold of the control stick and smirked at Naomi. “Don’t tell me you’re not excited.”
The GRS-2 slowly drove into the colon. As it left the gruff stone floor and the metallic rails for the slimy, rubbery mat of tissue, Abby felt the vehicle slow down even more. The GRS-2’s treads worked against the chewy tissue. “Chester, I want you to analyze the colon.”
“Huh?” Chester got confused.
“Activate the scanner.” Abby clarified.
“Um, right?” Chester scratched his neck and studied the keyboard and screen in front of him. “Um, let’s see…scan?”
LabRat showed up on a screen in front of Chester’s keyboard. “You know what? I do it remotely.”
A small scanning device surfaced on the roof of the GRS-2 and started projecting a green light. As the device started twisting, the light started scanning the nearby surroundings.
The image of LabRat disappeared and was replaced with incoming data. “Wow.” Chester read off the screen. “When you said this doctor was making giant colons I thought you meant he made like artificial, non-organic replicas or something but this is real human tissue. It got goblet cells and enterocytes and everything. It’s like a real colon except gigantic and somehow doesn’t need to be inside a human body.”
“Yes. Dr. Colon might be nuttier than an overfed squirrel but he is a genius at bio-engineering.” Abby stated. “He can grow human organs from scratch and make them even larger than normal.”
“That’s amazing.” Chester exclaimed. “Doesn’t he know how many people he can help with this kind of science? He could save everyone that’s in need of an organ transplant.”
“True but some people are selfish and wasteful with their gifts and only uses them to hurt others.” Abby replied.
Chester looked at his hands as he clenched them, no doubt think about his own ‘gifts’. He looked at the screen again. “There’s also seem too be a lot of water inside the walls of the colon.”
“No wonder.” Naomi said. “The colon’s most important function is to drain humidity from fecal matter.”
Abby and Chester stared at her, dumbfounded.
“What?” Naomi asked puzzled. “I’m not completely scientifically ignorant.” At that moment, a laud clonk was heard. “What was that?” Naomi asked, anxiously.
“Don’t know. Sounded like something hit the GRS.” Abby said. Then another clonk was heard and this time it shacked the GRS-2.
Slowly, Naomi tilted her head up and stared right into the open mouth of a horrifying pale white creature, sticking to the cockpit. Naomi shrieked in fear. “What is that thing!?”
Acting swiftly, Abby got off her seat, opened the door, leaned out and aimed her goopshooter at the animal on the roof. It was an almost 6 feet long, white worm, sucking on the glass of the cockpit. Abby aimed at its head and fired. Immediately upon being shot, the worm lost its footing and fell to the ground. Abby then heard more sucking sounds. She looked back and saw two other worms, identical to the one she’d shoot, sucking at the hull of the GRS-2. They didn’t seem to be doing any damage thou. Abby fired at them and the two worms scurried into the shadows. She then closed the door and went back to the driving seat.
Naomi and Chester stared out the window, at the worm that had fallen off the roof. It oriented a bit by turning its head around before quickly crawling into hiding. “What was that?” Naomi asked.
“It looked like a hookworm.” Chester stated.
“A what?” Naomi asked.
At that moment, Abby pressed down on the gas paddle, pushed the control stick forward and the GRS-2 speeded away, causing Naomi and Chester to fall backwards. Naomi was lucky enough to fall into her seat but Chester ended up on the floor.
“Sorry, I should probably I have told you to get back in your seats.” Abby apologized.
“No problem.” Chester groaned as he struggled to get back into his seat. He sighed with relief once he finally managed to get his butt in the seat.
“What were you going to say, Chester?” Naomi asked.
“I said those creatures looked like hookworms. Bloodsucking parasites that live in the intestines.”
“I think you’re right, Chester. Those things probably were hookworms.” Abby said.
“Yeah, but it’s weird. Hookworms usually infect the small intestine, not the colon.” Chester stated.
“Oh yeah, that’s what’s really weird about this. Not that they’re the size of alligators or that we’re driving inside a huge colon!” Naomi exclaimed sarcastically.
Abby couldn’t help but smile a bit. “You know, I had actually forgot that most people find these kinds of things surprising.”
Suddenly, a man stumbled into the GRS-2’s headlights. “Whoow!” Abby exclaimed before hitting the breaks. The GRS-2 stopped right in front of him. Soon more people emerged from the darkness and gathered around the man. There were dozens of them. They all looked filthy, tired and scared.
“Those must be the passengers from the missing train.” Naomi stated.
“Come on, let’s go meet them.” Abby said as she rose from her seat. Naomi and Chester followed her out of the GRS-2.
The moment Naomi got outside she covered her nose with her hand. “Aww, this place stinks worse than the inside of Fartzilla.”
“I know, the stench has like a heat behind it.” Chester retorted. “But what can one expect when you’re inside a colon?”
“Too true.” Naomi nodded.
Abby walked up to the people. Some of them actually backed away when she approached them. She could tell by the look in their eyes that they were horrified. What had they been thru these last couple of hours? “We’re from the bureau of Grossology. We’re here to get you out of here.”
No one said anything. One middle age woman stumbled towards Abby. She fell on her knees in front of Abby and clung to her legs. “Thank you, thank you! Just get us out of here!”
Abby was a bit taken aback by this desperate woman’s pleading but tried to keep a level head. She bent down and took the woman’s hands in hers. “Everything is going to be fine.” She then looked at the rest of the people. “Is this everyone?”
One man stepped forth. Abby could tell he was the train operator by his uniform. “Yes, everyone is here.” He spoke as calmly as he could.
“We have been attacked all day!” Another man in the crowd screamed.
“Attacked?” Chester stepped forward. “Attacked by what?”
“THOSE THINGS!” One of the passengers screamed and pointed to what was coming towards them. It was an entire pack of hookworms. Some of them sliding across the slippery ground, others crawled on the walls of the colon. All of them sported their trademark hooked fangs, ready to strike.
“This isn’t good.” Abby commented and pulled out her goopshooter. “Chester, Naomi, get your weapons ready. The rest of you take cover behind the vehicle.” The former train passengers followed Abby’s orders and ran to take cover (what little there was) behind the GRS-2. Chester pulled out his goopshooter and aimed at the worms.
Naomi pulled out her goopshooter, the orange My First Goopshooter. “DON’T WORRY, THIS WON’T BE TRICKY. WE’RE OFF TO FIGHT SOMETHING ICKY. YAY!” Naomi sighed. “I must have grabbed this one by mistake.”
The hookworms got into position and waited to strike while the Grossologists took a firmer hold of their weapons.
They then heard a malicious chuckling along with ominous footsteps coming closer. Dr. Colon walked out of the shadows, cupping his hands behind his back while chuckling. He looked pretty much the same as he did two years ago but his clothing was different. Instead of a white lab coat with typical office attire underneath, he now wore a black and white speedsuit with a white T printed atop the chest. He still wore his cardinal rubber gloves thou. “Well, well. Isn’t it the Grossologists? I knew I would have to deal with your lot sooner or later. My name is Doctor Cornelius Colon.”
No one said anything.
“Really? Nothing?” Dr. Colon was surprised. “People usually laugh at me when I tell them my name but you we’re polite not to. Thank you. I kind of feel sorry about having to kill you now.”
Naomi scowled and clenched a fist. Last time she met Dr. Colon she was just a scared little girl that he could kidnap and do away with. But that was then and now she was a Grossologist. “Whatever you’re planning Colon, we will stop you! Just like last time!”
Dr. Colon blinked puzzled. “What do you mean last time? This is the first time we’ve met.”
Now it was Naomi that blinked puzzled. Abby leaned closer to her and whispered. “We weren’t wearing our grossgoggles last time so he can’t recognize us.”
“Oh.” Naomi realized. “Sorry, I was thinking about somebody else.”
“Who? Who could you possible confuse me with?” Dr. Colon asked.
“Um…Doctor Small Intestine?” Naomi said, having to come up with a lie on the spot.
“So you want me to believe there is another villain out there with nearly the exact same gimmick as me?” Dr. Colon asked.
“Um…yeah.” Naomi replied.
“Darn it! I knew I shouldn’t have waited till third season to make my comeback. Now some other guy is stealing my shtick.” The mad proctologist exclaimed, irritated.
“Why are you doing all this?” Chester asked, still aiming his goopshooter at the doctor and the giant hookworms.
“You wanna know why? I tell you why?” Dr. Colon exclaimed. “When I was a young lad…”
‘O boy, here he goes with the tired old villain-origin-speech.’ Abby thought to herself while rolling her eyes. ‘It’s unbelievable how boring these get when you already know the story.’
‘I guess I can relate to this guy but I don’t understand why he doesn’t just change his name? And overthrowing the world with a giant colon just sounds… stupid.’ Chester thought.
Meanwhile, Naomi was thinking, ‘This slimesuits is way too tight. I can feel it getting lodged up my crotch.’
“…and once I’m done, everyone will fear the awesome power of the colon!” Dr. Colon finally finished his speech and laughed maniacally.
“Are you done?” Abby asked, getting impatient.
“Yes, I’m done. Hookworms, get them! Drain their blood!” Dr. Colon ordered and the hookworms rushed into action, charging at the Grossologists and the civilians.
Chester took aim at a hookworm that was heading towards him. He fired but the hookworm ducked at the last second, slithered right up to Chester and devoured his goopshooter and jabbed one of its fangs into Chester’s arm. Chester screamed in pain. His fear involuntarily activated his powers and the rot destroyed the fang that was cutting into his arm. The hookworm jerked back in pain and slithered away, swollowing Chester’s goopshooter when it did. Chester was hyperventilated before looking over his arm. He was relieved to find that the damage was superficial. Only his slimesuit and a bit of his skin had been cut. “Without a goopshooter…I need to rely on my powers.” He said to himself.
Three hookworm’s charged at Abby. Abby aimed her goopshooter at them, held in the trigger and button for a moment before firing a large shot of slime. Two of the hookworm’s got stuck in the big glob and was pasted to each other. The third hookworm was almost upon Abby. The Grossologist summersaulted sideways and got into a crouching position. The hookworm made a quick turn and was once again over her. Abby’s spring-loaded body sprinted and her fist collided with the hookworm’s lower jaw. The worm’s entire boneless head vibrated at the blow. Disorientated and hurt, the parasite retreated.
A hookworm went after a couple of passengers. The woman shrieked as her husband tried to protect her by standing between her and the approaching worm. Naomi saw them and aimed My First Goopshooter at the predator. Her shot went right over the hookworm’s head and hit the wall. “YOU’RE NOT IMPROVING. PLEASE KEEP ON SHOOTING.”
“This thing is gonna drive me crazy!” Naomi shouted, fuming with irritation. The hookworm forgot about the passengers and turned its attention to Naomi. In an instant, it was upon her. Naomi leaped out of the way just in time and took new aim at the worm but what she hadn’t realized was two other hookworms, sneaking up on her from behind.
“Naomi, look out!” Chester shouted. He ignited his hands with dark energy and aimed them against Naomi’s attackers. ‘I should be able to blast these creatures with my rot powers, just like Kid rot.’ Suddenly, another hookworm attacked him from behind and pinned him to the mucus covered floor. The worm slithered around him like a giant snake, trying to find the perfect place to stab its fangs into the boy’s body. Chester started to panic, not just for his own sake but for Naomi’s. He had to get out of there immediately. He did not know if it was the pressure from the parasite atop of him or the emotions building up inside of him but in the next moment Chester’s body ignited with dark energy and he rose up with a deafening, primeval roar. His powers turned the worm into dust and continued upward into the ceiling of the colon.
Abby had seen it all and was terrified. “Oh no.”
For a moment, everything was silent. It was like time had stopped for a second.
Then the rot took effect. It spread thru out the colon, like dark infection. When it reached the roof, the colon became soft and dry before finally crumbling. People screamed as they as well as the hookworms tried to avoid the falling debris.
“NO!” Dr. Colon shouted, arms stretched towards the ceiling. “Not my precious col-*WHAM*. The proctologist’s sentence was cut short when a piece of the colon fell on top of him.
In a few seconds the cave-in was over. Most people had been lucky enough to avoid the debris but some had been buried under the rotten masses. The hookworms seems to have all gone.
Chester couldn’t move. He couldn’t stop shacking. He just stood there, staring blankly at all the destruction he’d caused.
“Chester, come help me.” Abby shouted as she tried to get a man out from under some of the fallen debris.
Her voice became nothing but background noise to Chester as he kept staring at his mistake. Kid Rot turned up by his side, cackling like a maniac. “Oh man, Chester. Look at all this? You’ve caused more chaos accidentally than I’ve done on purpose. Maybe it’s time to forget about this entire hero stuff and do more of what I do. I mean, you’re clearly better at it.”
Chester did not know why but something in Kid Rot’s voice struck a core. He shook his head before running as fast as he could towards the wreckage. He crouched down and stared helping a woman out from under the rotten mass. “I’m so sorry about this, this is all my fault. I didn’t think before I acted.”
Chester got her up on her feet. “Just get me out of here.” The woman answered tiredly.
Naomi opened up her eyes. She had been buried under some of the rotting colon when it collapsed. She felt something breathing on her face. Once her sight cleared, she saw that it was a giant hookworm that had been buried with her. Its body wiggled a little but it seemed unable to move otherwise. Strangely, Naomi didn’t feel scared. She felt My First Goopshooter was still in her hands. She slowly brought it up and stuck the barrel in the hookworm’s open mouth. “This time I won’t miss.” She fired two times, completely clogging up the mouth of the hookworm. The hookworm thrashed in desperation and actually managed to throw the piece of the debris off of them. It then slithered out of sight. With its mouth clogged up, Naomi figured it was no longer a threat.
“I’M SO PROUD OF YOU! YOU FINALLY MADE A BREAKTHROUGH!” My First Goopshooter said.
Naomi wiped off some mucus from her goggles and sighed. “Please, shut up.”
A gloved hand sprung out from the wreckage of rotten human-tissue and proceeded to push the fallen debris of the evil man under it. “What the heck was that? Is that kid a demon or something?” Dr. Colon then saw Abby and the other Grossologists as the civilians gathered around them.
“Is everyone accounted for?” Abby asked.
“Yeah, no one else were buried underneath that molted rubble.” The train operator replied.
With the Grossologists occupied, Dr. Colon figured he might be able to slip away. He turned around and started running deeper into the colon. Unfortunately for him, Abby heard him running. She spun around, took aim and fired her goopshooter. The green slime hit Dr. Colon’s feet, plastering them together and the proctologist fell face-first to the floor. He lifted his head up, growling irritated. “Hookworms! Attack!” He shouted.
“Sorry, Colon. The hookworms fled when the colon um, caved in.” Abby stated as she casually walked up to the floored villain.
Dr. Colon sighed. “You spend all that time growing them, raising them and starving them to make them more bloodthirsty and how do they repay you? By running away.”
Abby fired her goopshooter again, this time gluing together the proctologist’s hands. She then forced him onto his legs and pressed her goopshooter against his back. “Now, skip.” Reluctantly, Dr. Colon started jumping like an Easter bunny to the GRS-2 and the others. “Question, is anyone here sick or injured?” Abby asked.
“I am sick…of this place.” Someone in the crowd called out.
“Let me clarify, does anyone have any lacerations, broken bones or a feeling of nausea or fever?” Abby asked again.
A series of mumbles and headshakes went thru the crowd of former passengers. “No, it doesn’t seem like anyone’s injured.” The operator said.
“Okay, then this is how we’re gonna do it.” Abby exclaimed before gesturing to Naomi and Chester. “My colleges here will take point. They’ll lead the way out of this giant colon. Meanwhile, I will follow you in the GRS-2. That way I can protect you from any hookworms that may sneak up from behind. Also, the good doctor here,” she nudged Dr. Colon with the goopshooter, “will keep me company, so he won’t get any ideas of escaping. Everyone okay with that?”
“I’m not going anywhere with him!” One woman proclaimed and pointed accusingly at Chester, who flinched.
“Me neither. He caused the avalanche.” A man stated.
“True, we saw it! He’s some kind of mutant or something.” Another man said.
Abby scowled. “Chester made a mistake. He didn’t mean cause trouble.” She crossed her arms over her chest. “Besides, last time I checked, everyone were just fine.” Naomi meanwhile, tried to comfort Chester by placing a hand on his arm and giving him a reassuring smile. It helped a bit.
“That doesn’t mean he’s not dangerous!” One woman screamed.
“Yeah, someone with powers like that shouldn’t exist. I mean, who knows what he will do next.” Another passenger said.
“Why is the bureau even using guys like that?” Another one asked.
Abby started to get angry. “Now listen here you-
“CAN EVERYONE SHUT-UP?!” Dr. Colon shouted at the top of his lungs and everyone fell silent, staring at him. “Everything that has happened here is because of me! I built this giant colon you’re now standing in, I grew and trained those hookworms that tried to suck your blood! I even had plans on rounding you all up and turn you into feces! I am the villain here, not him! That boy is just a moronic klutz with superpowers that accidentally wrecked my diabolical creation!” Dr. Colon went down on his knees and loudly begged. “I am the bad guy! Hate me, hate me, hate me!”
One passenger rubbed his eyes. “Listen, I will come with you but only if that blonde kid stays in the armored car or whatever it is.”
Abby rolled her eyes. “If you want to get out of here I don’t see how you can have a choice in the matter.”
“No Abby, if it makes everyone feel safe, I’ll ride with you in the GRS-2.” Chester said, taking a step forward.
Abby considered it for a moment. “Naomi, you okay with working alone?”
Naomi hesitated for a moment before nodding.
“Alright then. Gets moving people, it includes you too doc.” Abby exclaimed. The people started following Naomi in the direction that the Grossologists had come from while Abby pushed Dr. Colon into the GRS-2. Chester followed her in. Once inside, Abby forced Dr. Colon onto his knees. “Stay put.”
“Yeah, yeah. No reason to be forceful.” Dr. Colon whined. Abby sat down and swiveled around in the driver seat. The green and aqua vehicle turned around and slowly rolled after the former passengers and Naomi.
Chester sat down in one of the seats, his eyes obscured by his hair and his lips frowning. “Abby, maybe-maybe I’m not cut out for this Grossology stuff.”
Abby looked at him. “Chester, you defeated Kid Rot, not to mention a giant dinosaur-robot. I don’t think you should give-up after just one setback.”
Chester understood what Abby meant and it cheered him up a bit but he still had doubt. “I tried to think about the things you told me back at the gaglab but at the moment it was hard to focus on them.”
“Well, of course. Like most things it takes time and practice to learn.” Abby smiled a little. “But you can practice now if you want to.”
“I can see you’re still distressed. I would be to after the way those people treated you.”
“They were right in being scared of me. No one can blame them.” Chester argued.
Abby couldn’t help but smile at him. “Sometimes I think you’re too nice for your own good.”
Chester smiled too. There was something about Abby’s way of talking that made him feel really good.
Dr. Colon was confused. He looked at Chester’s silly smile and then at Abby, smiling back at him. It was way too syrupy. “Odd, I don’t feel sick yet I feel I have to hurl.”
“Shut up!” Abby shushed him. “Chester, train your meditation while keeping an eye on him.”
“Sure, Abby.” Chester nodded.
“I’ll call Ty.” Abby said and called her brother on her grossometer.
“Hey there Abby, I was just about to call you.” Ty greeted, he seemed very happy for some reason.
“I got good news, Ty.” Abby said.
“Bet they’re not as good as mine.” Her brother teased.
“Oh really, tell me.” Abby leaned back in her seat, her smile widen a little.
“Nah, you go first.” Ty insisted, smirking just like his sister.
“Okay. Ty, we captured Dr. Colon.” Abby exclaimed.
Ty looked shocked for some reason. “Um…that’s impossible.”
Abby blinked puzzled. “What do you mean impossible? You don’t think the three of us can take down Dr. Colon? He’s a c-list villain at best.”
“Hey!” Dr. Colon cried out, offended.
“Still, it’s impossible for you to catch Colon.” Ty insisted with a confused expression.
“Why?” Abby asked, getting a bit peeved.
“Because…we caught Dr. Colon.” Ty said and tilted the screen so Abby could see over his shoulder. Abby’s eyes widen in shock. There, sitting immobilized on the ground behind Ty was Dr. Colon.
Abby blinked, dumbfounded. She looked at Dr. Colon on the floor and then looked at the Dr. Colon on screen and then back at Dr. Colon on the floor. They looked exactly the same, except the one on screen had a D instead of a T on his speedsuit. Abby couldn’t understand what was going on.Dr. Colon smirked. “It’s a real mind-twister, isn’t it?”