My uncle was a pretty cool guy. He's not dead or anything, but I guess you could say he's no longer with us in a way. "Us", being my family.
A little background:
Every time there was a big Iowa College football game he'd come over to my house and watch it with my Mom. He was very passionate about the sport, not afraid to drop F-bombs in excitement or anger around us, but in the moment that didn't quite matter. As far as I can recall, the two loved to hang out with each other. Brother and Sister. He was so much fun to be around, always brightening my day when he had the chance to visit. For visiting monthly, I never really got the chance to go to his place often. That might've be because it seemed he was moving houses every time I visited him. Though there is an important feature I distinctly remember about Uncle R. He loved the Beatles. I guess you could say he was my very first introduction to them, although I didn't start to like them until around 2016 and this was YEARS before that. I recall going into his basement and seeing various posters of the Beatles sprung up all about the walls. I thought to myself, Who are those Amish guys?. Silly young me. He was a huge fan of classic rock, and eventually I became one too. He always had something cool to talk to us about or show us.
Uncle R. was someone I greatly enjoyed to be around.
A few years ago, Uncle R. fell in love with a woman. Let's call her Trish. Trish was from China. I don't know exactly know how Uncle R. met up with Trish, but whatever the circumstances may be, they met up, and it changed his life. They dated for quite a while, we got to meet up with her at our home when he came to visit. We got to know her a little bit more. She even once Face-timed us when she was visiting her parents back in China. Months later, their love blossomed further into marriage, and the two, well, got married. I remember the day quite well. At the Church to see the bridegroom kiss the bride, and at his (yet again, newly moved into) house to celebrate. The party was mostly held in the basement, it was quite a sight to see. Various decorations from Trish's culture were hung from the walls, alongside with standard wedding stuff. She had a beautiful red wedding dress on. It was a great day. I recall my mother being happy for him, nowadays though I can't help but feel unsure about that anymore.
Reason being, a few months later, Uncle R. moved again. This time, he was gone for good. He'd gone off with Trish to Des Moines. He also cut off most, or all contact with us. Cell phones, emails, all gone. The day I heard about I was very confused, and my mother wasn't doing too great about it. She was sad, confused, but mostly furious about the whole situation. I believe I tried asking her what happened, but she didn't give me many details besides those few. I still don't know what exactly happened that day. After that day, very rarely would I ever hear about him, but every time I did it was from my mother, who genuinely didn't care for him anymore. Since that day, she loathes him very much so. She doesn't want anything to do with him anymore.
The last times I ever saw him were two very separate occasions. He and Trish managed to come to my older brother's high school graduation party. I don't know if someone close to us told him about it, or if he just knew to come, but he showed up alright, much to the shock of most of my family. I thought it was pretty cool to see him and Trish again after all this time, but Mom and Dad were not pleased. Although they played it cool, I could tell they weren't very happy with him showing up to the party. He didn't stay for very long. The second time was when we were out in the city. I was in Best Buy with my parents when I hear them call me over, and look who was working there. Uncle R. We didn't even know he was working at the place, but goddamn we were not expecting to see him there. Both my parents and I talked to him for quite some time to see what he was up to, and I told him what I was doing. I told him about the whole Beatles thing and he greatly supported me on it. He even shared me his email so he could send me one of their albums in MP3 (which I am very glad for.) Yet again, Mom and Dad played it nice, but once we left the store it was back to the same carelessness as before.
Today (Mother's Day), my mom was going to visit her mother when she saw Uncle R.'s car in the driveway. She told me she couldn't stay there for more than three minutes. She wanted to stay a lot longer, but because of Uncle R.'s visit, she left early. She was very upset about it. "I pulled up to her driveway and I saw his fucking- ... his car there. I didn't stay."
I still don't know the full story about my Uncle. I never could understand why my mom is so hating of him. There must be a detail I'm missing out on, because I genuinely don't know the whole story of what happened to Uncle Rod. It makes me really sad when I think about it because I loved spending time with him. He was genuinely a really cool guy. Now he's practically taboo within my family name.
I miss him every now and then, even if my family doesn't.