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I woke up,
sweating, cursing, crying, kicking
my head
against the brick wall
that tastes like nicotine,

i dreamed of her
again and again and again.
fuck this,
     said the merchant, and tore off some flesh
i do not need this any more.

a raging erection
kills my brain cells
i get into the shower, hot water burns my body.
fuck this,
     said Hamlet, when daddy came and visited him
i do not need this anymore.

i was dreaming of a better life
empty life
i was writing, sitting in an empty
better room.
she came, naked
her flesh was pink
like a manifesto of pain
her flesh was from hell.
fuck this,
     said Charles Bovary and started reading the letters
i do not need this anymore.

She sat on the table,
She spread her legs,
She kissed my hand,

once more, i can feel (taste, touch, smell, think)
her pink inside
i would throw up,
but i was ecstatic.
fuck this,
     said Charles Dexter Ward as he stumbled into insanity
i do not need this anymore.

industrial cunnilingus destroys
the smile of my face
scars on my back
remind me of my fall
fuck this.
sometimes, dreams can be quite bitchy...
Add a Comment:
 
:iconerelshale:
Erelshale Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2010
wow...nemam rijeci
Reply
:iconjohnkeats:
JohnKeats Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2010
:)

nadam se da je to dobar znak :)
Reply
:iconleathea:
Leathea Featured By Owner Jun 1, 2007
Sviđa mi se. Vjerojatno zbog toga što u biti prikazuje surovost emocija, unutarnji bijes, nešto...borbu. Nešto kaj je istovremeno toliko nedefinirano i toliko jasno da bi mene dovelo do implozije. Nekako mi se čini kao da dio sebe mogu pronaći u tim motivima, iako dugo nisam napisala niš sličnog.

Kaj se tiče pisanja kao takvog, meni odlično dođe ko ventil. I u biti su mi najbolje stvari nastale onda kad je bila prevelika količina emocija nagomilana negdje... ili sam počela razmišljati o nečem kompleksnom što me opterećivalo i što je uzrokovalo bujicu asocijacija i sjećanja jednako bolnog intenziteta... i sve to je nekako moralo i htjelo ići van. Dakle, podupirem pisanje u svakom slučaju :)
A ono... normalno je da si kritičan sam prema sebi, meni se svaka napisana stvar kad je čitam čini sve gora i gora, bez obzira što ljudi rekli. Uvijek je to stvar onoga što tebi sve to znači jer uz ono što pišeš u glavi imaš još mali milijun detalja koji se na to nadovezuju.



Eto, moj dojam. :)
Reply
:iconcookies-bleed:
cookies-bleed Featured By Owner May 6, 2006
Hmm.

Obrazovan si. :nod:

A i pjesma je oke. Kraj je malo... ali to je meni malo spigano, samo zato kaj sam nedoraslo dijete. Ali cijelokupna slika koju predstavljaš, ne, je vrlo impresivna. Rekla bi Baudelaire, ali se ne usudim. Onda kažem pa, Čarli i ti ste si slični. Na neki način.

Ovaj, da. Jako je kasno. Na mom planetu. O_O

Ali svejedno, favam ovo. O da. Naša mladost je naša nada, i sve to.

Au. Pala sam sa stolca. Laku noć, pozdrav zdravo. :salute:
Reply
:iconjohnkeats:
JohnKeats Featured By Owner May 7, 2006
hmm....

pa sad.. da je pjesma ok.. nije...
fali joj ritam, gubi dosljednost, i nekako ne zvuci bash dobro kad ju se krene citati.

a i ostale pjesme pate od istog problema.
u biti neznam napisat pjesmu. previse odlutam od pocetne ideje.... treba mi jos puno vjezbe.
ali hvala na komentaru.

i hvala na favu.
inace, ovo mi je najdraza pjesmica od svih koje sam pokusao napisati.
Reply
:iconizzidorius:
izzidorius Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
hehe,dobar si :)
Reply
:iconjohnkeats:
JohnKeats Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2006
:nod: :D
Reply
:iconadesina:
AdeSinA Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2006
u doticaju s emocijama, povrijeđen možda...lijepo...i zanimljivi osvrti s onim "fuck this"..stvarno kao da nema zivotne situacije za koju to ne mozes reci.:nod:

e i.."industrial cunnilingus"...jel to razmisljanje o vremenu opcenito ili tom konkretnom dozivljaju???:O_o:
Reply
:iconjohnkeats:
JohnKeats Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2006
industrial...
jedno i drugo.. valjda. sve sto nas okruzuje se na neki nacin preslikava na nas same.


i da... povrijeđen.... but it was quite some time ago.

hvala na komentaru.
Reply
:iconjohnkeats:
JohnKeats Featured By Owner Jan 22, 2006
mah.... vjerojatno i bi zvucalo bolje...

ali [link].domacem.

nije da nisam pokusao...
jesam, ali to zvuci jebeno presmjesno.

a u engleskom imam ponesto ograniceniji vokabular, a i nije mi domaci jezik, pa postoji jedna izvjesna distanca oko svega toga.
Reply
:iconmarthalights:
MarthaLights Featured By Owner Jan 22, 2006  Professional Interface Designer
manifesto of pain... uaaaa! zakon.

mislim da bi nekako bolje zvučala na materinjem. mislim. a to što ja mislim, to ti je rekla-kazala...
Reply
:iconvenusmantrap:
venusmantrap Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2005  Hobbyist General Artist
It's very very good. Strong and heavy.
Paper endures all..
Reply
:iconjohnkeats:
JohnKeats Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2005
indeed...

but you know what.
after i wrote this, a lot of my pain dissapeard.
thats why i posted it.

that rambling somehow helped me to put some things behind my back.
strange but true.

Jk.
Reply
:iconvenusmantrap:
venusmantrap Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2005  Hobbyist General Artist
Writing helps. Sometimes it's the only thing keeping you on this side of sanity.
Reply
:iconthevisiongirl:
TheVisionGirl Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2005
i like it..tensed but nicely written.
mixes many feelings.
love/regret/lust/anger
Reply
:iconjohnkeats:
JohnKeats Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2005
thank you...

that is exactely how i felt when i woke up, and wrote that rambling :)

btw... yuo have an eccelent gallery. very nice work.
adn i shall post more things in engleish, so feel free to stop by anytime.

Jk.
Reply
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November 10, 2005
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