30 Days of Pride Challenge - Day 2

3 min read

Deviation Actions

JocelynSamara's avatar

Continuing the 30 Days of Pride Challenge. #30DaysOfPride

2. How old were you when you first discovered you were LGBTQ?
Honestly, as far as the whole "being trans" thing goes, I've basically known since my earliest memory (like age 3 or 4). From pretty much day one, I knew I didn't feel right as a boy. I didn't know terminology or anything until we got the internet in my house in my early teens, mind you. The catch is that I was put under the impression very early on that how I felt was "weird" or taboo or whatever. So, I knew how I felt, but I was too afraid to say or do anything about it for most of my life.

Orientation-wise, things were a bit easier for me. I mean, I grew up pretending to be a boy (and I admit I wasn't very good at it), but I always liked girls. Not really much in the way of discovery there. And accepting that I still liked girls through transition wasn't really an issue. I don't know. That just wasn't a problem for me.

That said, I will add that I only started noticing an occasional attraction to men since starting hormone therapy. I don't know if one thing has any connection to the other, but that's when I noticed it. It IS rare though, and although I consider myself panromantic now, my attraction towards men seems to usually be limited to guys who are a bit more femme. (It's also moot since I'm monogamous and happily married to a woman.) XD

Finally, I did NOT pick up on my asexuality until like two years ago. Looking back, the signs were all there, but I think there was some kind of confusion on what the term really meant and perhaps a little bit of denial. XD

© 2016 - 2023 JocelynSamara
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
I started to suspect I might be bisexual when I started recalling childhood memories after turning 18 in 2006. I remembered looking at and noticing boys, and how I'd felt differently around my best friend, but disregarded it as "too rare to happen to me" until 2009 when I was talking to my then-girlfriend and she asked me if I was into guys as well. I ended up saying yes as I couldn't just claim otherwise. I've come to realize I was attracted to my best friend since we first met; I just didn't acknowledge what that meant.

Since then, I gradually came out to more and more people until now I'm more or less openly bi. My current girlfriend is both trans and ace, by the way, and for her she just knew she was a girl from the start and never thought of herself as male.